Via: Hola USA
Category: Language
Amazon Is Under the Impression there is a ‘Hispanic Flag’
I don’t want to rain on your Hispanic Heritage Month parade, but I felt this urge to let you know there is a Hispanic-Flag-themed thing going on on the Internet.
I will NOT name the culprit (OK, it’s Amazon.com) but there are these T Shirts currently on sale promising to mix your “Americanness” with a flag of your choice, including of course the Hispanic Flag. Because, Why-The-Hell-Not?
The only good news is that these beauties (most likely Made in China or Made in El Salvador) are only $19.99, and RETURNS ARE FREE.
See for yourself…
Mexicans Mock Avocado Shortage with Hilarious Memes
OK, you know the drill. No matter how tragic a situation will get, Mexicans will always see the funny side of the whole thing.
And the avocado shortage of late is no exception.
In case you have no idea what’s going on, prices of avocado have risen by more than 90 percent since the end of 2015, mostly because Mexico’s biggest ever harvest is coming to an end and a new one is not yet ready. On top of that, the shortage has coincided with a sharp fall in U.S. production caused by heatwave in California, hitting the the Fourth of July weekend, the second largest avocado consumption event of the year in the U.S. after the Super Bowl.
You might think an avocado shortage in a place like Mexico would be no laughing matter, but then again, you do not know Mexicans.
Here are some of my faves, explained for the monolingual crowd.
GET ONE KILO OF AVOCADO: SIX MONTHS WITHOUT INTEREST
2. WHEN YOU WANT AVOCADO IN YOUR TORTA, BUT YOU ARE POOR
3. SHOULD I BUY A KILO OF AVOCADO OR AN IPHONE 6?
JUST THROW SOME EXTRA AVOCADO TO THE AVOCADOS
CARLOS SLIM LOSES HALF HIS FORTUNE AFTER ORDERING ENCHILADAS WITH EXTRA AVOCADO
MARRY ME; I’M LOADED
Today in Mexican to English Translations…
I can only hope Fiesta Inn Hotels in Guadalajara, Mexico pays its employees well enough to go Google Translate stuff. For the gringos, you know?
Hat tip: Roberto Morán
Everything is Better in Spanish, Including ‘Orange Is the New Black’ [Feat. Soraya Montenegro]
The rumors were true — and the wait is over.
Soraya Montenegro, the evil stepmother of Mexican telenovela María la del Barrio, has finally ended up where she belongs: In prison.
More specifically, Litchfield Penitentiary.
¡Sí, señor! Montenegro (played many years ago by the great Itatí Cantoral) is the star of a new Netflix campaign to promote the fourth season of Orange Is the New Black in Latin America.
So far so good, but Netflix would be well advised to extend a big GRACIAS to Cristian Vazquez, an 18-year-old from Danbury, Connecticut, who is credited with catapulting Soraya to viral fame by posting screenshots and videos of her on his Tumblr page.
“I first saw a picture with the same caption of another actress, Victoria Ruffo, and then thought it would be funny to do the same,” Vazquez told the Daily Dot. “After posting the first photo of Soraya Crying in Spanish it became very popular because of a video of her acting in the telenovela Maria La Del Barrio, in which she, the villain, tries to kill three people. The majority of the people on Tumblr have never seen a telenovela and are not familiar with the exaggerated acting style, and so they found it hilarious.”
Yes, Soraya is awesome and Netflix’ promo video is hilarious. Watch it below but — more importantly — don’t forget to thank Cristian Vazquez.
‘Latinas for Trump’ Want to Trade their President for Trump –or Something
Yes, there is a group called Latinas for Trump and, yes, they like to look red hot and seriously think America can be made great again. OK, that’s great, but, as the group readies an important gathering in –where else? — South Florida, they will be well-advised to proofread their Spanish-language messages.
Last time I checked, the Spanish translation of Trump for President was “Trump para presidente,” and not “por.” But perhaps as my smart pants Twitter buddy Colin Docherty says, they might just want to trade their president for Trump. For some reason.
Who knows?
See? Even the GOP Knows Mexicans Speak Perfect English Before Crossing the U.S. Border
Mike Pape, a Republican dude running for Kentucky’s first Congressional district, has released a new TV ad featuring what he thinks are Latino immigrants, complete with Mario Bros.-like mustaches and fake accents.
In the :30 TV spot (below) three men, presumably undocumented immigrants attempting to cross the border into the U.S., are running to a fence and cutting through it when they reveal their very specific political plans: To help stop Donald Trump and Ted Cruz but also Pape himself, because he’s going to help those two build a wall and repeal Obamacare and stuff.
The whole thing is so hilarious it’s hard to be offended. In fact, my favorite part of this whole thing are the English subtitles, because — in case you haven’t noticed — these guys are actually SPEAKING ENGLISH!
So, WTF Señor Pape? Get your caca together, man!
WATCH. CRINGE. DO NOT REPEAT.
Via: Think Progress
Tostitos Telenovela Features Catalina Creel, and Lots of Shirtlessness
Among this blogger’s favorite: An English-speaking version of eye-patched villain Catalina Creel, accusing her (always shirtless) son Enrique of double-dipping in the brand’s new Chunky Habanero Salsa. “¡Doble-dippeaste!”
This thing is so hilarious that I’m sort of forgiving Tostitos for their past transgressions.
The series and a trailer are featured on Tostitos.com and the brand’s YouTube channel.
Peru Sex Worker Vows to Put Order in the Brothel that is Congress
Angela Villón, a Peruvian sex worker, has been very active of late trying to snatch a seat in the country’s congress.
A native of Lima, Villón is running for El Frente Amplio, a coalition of leftist parties and movements, in Peru’s general and legislative elections this month. She is one of more than 2,600 candidates for 130 seats in Peru’s legislative chamber.
I am not sure if she will make it, but voters would be well-advised to pay attention. As Villón says in one of her awesome video campaign ads [below]: She is “a decent whore, determined to make Congress a respectable brothel.” (Una puta decente que hará del congreso un burdel respetable).
[Rimshot]
Hat tip: Iván Cordalupo
I Don’t Know you, but I’ll be Meeting with La Migra in April
Awww, New York City! — home of Mariachi Santas, Dominican sushi and life-size cardboard mariachis — is now proud to introduce you to La Migra, a Mexico-based norteño band that promises to rock your world on Friday April 8 in The Bronx.
According to a promo that has been plastered all over my neighborhood, La Migra will be soon playing at El Palenque, and the venue promises to let everybody in. Yes, EVERYBODY WILL BE ALLOWED TO COME IN.
Are you listening, Border Patrol?
Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem 2016
Obama Talks to Pánfilo: It’s not Que Bolá, It’s Qué Bolá. Qué Lío
Oh yes!
Before his historic (and hysterical) trip to Havana, Cuba, President Obama called Luis Silvia (aka Pánfilo), a retired, not-too-bright Cuban man who plays a (subtle) satire of how Cuban people often have to use their wits to escape the poverty and absurdity of life in modern communist Cuba.
In a video of the skit posted by the U.S. Embassy in Havana, Pánfilo ends up getting connected directly to Obama in the Oval Office only to be tangled up in the whole Qué bolá (or is it Qué bóla?) thing.
Watch, anyway, and let’s discuss this tomorrow. This blogger is too “Bolá” to make any more sense tonight.
Obama Goes to Cuba; Cubans Brace for the Dunkin’ Donuts Cuban Sandwich
It’s all over now.
President Barack Obama is set to arrive Sunday, March 20 in Cuba, marking the first time a sitting U.S. president visits the island in nearly 90 years.
And this, my friends, only means one thing. It means the pickled Dijon-infused Dunkin Donuts Cuban Sandwich is now closer to real Cubans than ever before.
¡Pobres cubanos!
Bud Light Banner Ad in Spanish Features Amy Schumer, Seth Rogen and Bad Grammar
Dear people of Budweiser:
While I appreciate your efforts to peddle bad, watery beer to my people (i.e. The Hispanics,) your advertising agency would be well-advised to plunk down a few pesitos to hire ME some Spanish-speaking person to at least — AT LEAST — proofread your stuff.*
Perhaps the folks that worked on the above banner would want to use Google Translate instead, which I’m sure is what you guys did to translate this other thing (below).
*DM me for details
Bernie Sanders en Español: Progresivo [sic], Honesto… and the Spanish Subjunctive is a Bitch
Bernie Sanders this week launched a new campaign ad in which we hear the Senator speak some Spanish at the end.
While saying “Soy Bernie Sanders y apruebo este mensaje” is not a very difficult thing to say and have him practice, Bernie’s Hispanic campaign — and Bernie’s supporters — would be well advised to take a better look at their Spanish-language print and online copy.
Take the above promo by a Bernie Sanders advocacy group, which perfectly shows what many non-native Spanish speakers have known for years: The Spanish subjunctive is a bitch.
Oh… and DON’T get me started on “Progresivo” por favor.
UPDATE: This blog post was updated on Sunday February 21, 2016 to reflect the promo is not an official Bernie Sanders ad, but one created by advocacy group Women for Bernie.
Hillary Clinton Makes Good on Her Promise to Be our Abuela
Making good on her promise to be the savior of my people and assume the role of our abuelas, Grandma Clinton has released Brave, a new 60-second spot in which we see her reassuring a young girl who says her parents are going to be deported.
“My parents have a letter of deportation,” the girl says. “I’m scared they are going to be deported.” Clinton then calls the girl on stage and tells her that she’s going to do everything she can to help her.
WATCH and do not try to hold back tears, because I guess that’s what we’re supposed to do upon seeing this thing.
MI BLOG ES TU BLOG 