Brilliant! Univision Will Have You Pay to Become a Walking Billboard Promoting Its Brand

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You can say whatever you want about Univision, but you cannot deny the company’s marketing team is genius.

Starting today, Univision viewers will be able to visit La Tienda Univision to purchase all sorts of tacky stuff, from El Gordo y la Flaca-themed T-shirts ($25.95) and mugs ($14.95) to pet’s gear featuring the Despierta América logo ($18.95.)

It is still early to tell if Univision’s venture into merchandising will become an important source of revenue for the cash-starved media company. But one thing is for sure: it certainly deals a serious blow to the recently launched Spanish-language version of Sky Mall.

Ay, Chihuahua!

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Ah… the wonders of marketing!

Honor Your Heritage. Eat Pizza. Drink Pepsi. Be Fat

2004.10.01.obese_childrenHispanic Heritage Month is in full swing now, and because there is never a better time to celebrate our heritage, Pizza Patrón has partnered with Pepsi Co. to bring us “!Viva Latino! Pizza Patron y Pepsi Festejan el Mes Patrio” [sic]

Notwithstanding the lack of proper punctuation, the special promotion has been “specifically designed to honor Latin culture” by having us indulge in unhealthy amounts of fast-food and soda.

According to a story in QSR:

With any 2-liter purchase of Pepsi products through September 30, customers will receive a free phone egrip Non-Slip Strip. The egrip […] features the Pizza Patron and Pepsi logos, as well as Pizza Patron’s slogan, “Latin Life, Enjoy.”

Latin Life, Enjoy?

What ever happened to Dr. Manny Alvarez and his Hot Latin Diet?

Newt Gingrich Launches Ghetto-Language Website

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It seems our favorite conservative politician, Newt Gingrich, has had a change of heart.

Not long ago, he regaled us with the now infamous quote about Spanish being the language of “living in a ghetto.” And now, the former House Speaker is using that same language to make sure Hispanics implement morals and values in our ghettos homes.

Mr. Gingrich this week launched The Americano, a bilingual site “offering a fair and balance perspective on the subjects that touch Hispanic Americans. A place where people can express themselves and learn all about traditional values.”

Ay, ay, ay! Happy Heritage Month, amigos!

Mariachis, Goya Food-Sponsored Señoritas Give ‘Los Mets’ a Hispanic Lift Against ‘Los Bravos’

LosMetsLargeNot to be outdone by Los Yankees and their legally-non-blond Latina, the New York Mets tonight decided to wear their “Los Mets” jerseys as they face the Atlanta Braves (or shall I say Los Bravos de Atlanta?).

Because unless you’ve been living under a rock (or don’t receive Hispanic Google alerts) we are right in the middle of Hispanic Heritage Month, baby!

My friend Henry is at Citi Field as we speak, and assures me there is a Mariachi band playing between innings…

All this, of course, spiced up with the sexy moves of some Goya Foods-sponsored señoritas.

Guess Who Will be Pitching This Weekend at Yankee Stadium?

amd_sonia_sotomayorVery rarely Every now and then Hispanic Heritage Month gives us some pleasant surprises, like this coming Saturday, when Justice Sonia Sotomayor will come off the bench… and onto the Yankees field to toss the ceremonial first pitch at Yankee Stadium, before the New York Yankees take on the Boston Red Sox.

“Having Justice Sotomayor, a South Bronx native, participate in our yearly Hispanic Heritage Month celebration is very exciting, as she is an inspiration to so many,” the Yankees’ director of Latino Affairs, told the local media.

We wish Ms. Sotomayor a safe pitch and hope she will have the time to enjoy some of the “Latin delicacies” the venue has to offer, including $5 empanadas at Goya’s Salsa on the Go food stand.

Yumi!

Attention Hispanic Shoppers: Buying Expensive, Useless Stuff Now Available in Spanish!

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I don’t know you, but these days the only pleasure I find while flying around the U.S. consists of browsing the pages of SkyMall, the quarterly in-flight magazine where you can find everything, from a life-size zombie statue and Retro Ice treat makers to potty-training devices for dogs.

So I was crushed delighted to find out SkyMall is now available in Spanish. This way, Hispanics, too, will be able to enjoy the pleasures of spending the money they don’t have in stuff they don’t need, like the $25 Fernando the Chihuahua statue (above) which -SkyMall editors inform us- will be a hit on your dining room…. (and hopefully will go nicely with that decorative plate featuring the Kennedy’s.)

Ay Chihuahua!

Statue Honoring ‘Los Temerarios’ in New Jersey has Residents [and This Blogger] Very Upset

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In the latest riff between a dwindling black community and a growing Mexican population in Passeic, New Jersey, a group of residents are fuming over the placing of a statue of Los Temerarios in some housing complex.

According to The Record of Bergen County:

“Some members of Passaic’s dwindling black population see the statue of Los Temerarios as a cultural affront to non-Mexicans.”

I don’t know about the black community in Passaic, but this blogger is a non, non-Mexican who thinks Los Temerarios are a cultural affront to culture. In Passeic or else.

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And Now… Tortilla + Lime + Salt Chocolate

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Marketing minds never stop working; so it is marketers we shall thank for the upcoming snack craze: Exotic chocolates (or shall I say “chockolates”?) featuring Ramen Noodle, French Toast and Tortilla lime+ salt flavors.

This super idea, someone tells me, comes from Komforte Chockolates, a company I know nothing about but to which I’d love to pitch the following flavors. How ’bout:

1. Chockolate pibil

2. Chockotinga

3. Chorilate

4. Mochapeño

5. Choco-chilaquiles

Will they make this blogger very happy and release some of these by September 16?

El Army Wishes Hispanics in Baghdad a Very Happy Heritage Month

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Don’t be fooled by this picture. Hispanics in the military are a happy bunch… Or at least, they are just about to be.

Starting Sept. 15, Hispanic soldiers in Iraq will be joining the Latino marketing cultural extravaganza known as Hispanic Heritage Month, as the company that took them to Iraq in the first place is preparing a series of events to honor their Heritage.

These include -of course- plenty of “Latin food” and salsa dancing, because that’s what you want to do when you live in a place surrounded by mortal danger and far away from your abuela.

Thalia Has a Passion for Shotguns. I Wonder if She Can See Alaska from Her Park Avenue Condo

It seems like when she is not talking to blabbering puppets or marrying music moguls, Mexican pop singer Thalía loves to hit the shooting range. So much so that she has her own Tullio Fabbri shotgun custom-made to fit her allegedly rib-less figure. And it’s not just the fashion thing.

As she tells WSJ.com reporter William Snyder, she’s nuts about shooting things.

“Once you start you get hooked up,” she says.

(Click on the photo below to watch her shoot)

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Oliver Stone Totally Hearts Chávez; Fears His New Movie Will not be Shown in U.S. [I Wonder Why]

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There is one thing that has Americans even more pissed than Obama speaking to their precious little brats children, and that is the fact that their very own, U.S.-born, Oscar-winning director Oliver Stone is now, like Hugo Chávez’ BFF.

Stone’s latest documentary, South of the Border premiered on Monday at the Venice Film Festival, to the chagrin of many and with a happy-looking Chávez walking the red carpet.

This blogger has not yet seen the film, so it will be best to refrain from making any further comments. Watch the trailer below and let me know what you think.

Are we ready to have Stone join the Axis of Evil yet?

Police Arrest Hispanic Man for Being Anti-Hispanic

Picture 4I couldn’t make this stuff up even if I tried. Turns out the guy who tossed a bottle and left a hate-filled note against Hispanics at a church in Long Island is, well, Hispanic. According to press reports:

Christian Mungia Garcia, 25, was arrested Friday night after hurling a wooden log and a glass bottle at a congregant of the Iglesia Evangélica Refugio de Salvacion in Patchogue. Cops later accused Garcia of leaving the hate-filled note Wednesday at the church.


Photo: The Daily News