Month: July 2015

This Latino Car Dealership in California Wants you to Buy a Nissan, Bash Donald Trump

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Tómala, Tómala....
Tómala, Tómala….

The world’s awesomest car dealership has produced the world’s awesomest commercial, in which we see the dealership’s general manager bashing a Donald Trump piñata, after which he declares:

“Aquí en Van Nuys Nissan, los latinos mandan.” (“Here at Van Nuys Nissan, Latinos rule.”)

This blogger thinks this commercial should win a Lion at Cannes or something. Alas, the corporate suits over at Nissan Motor Co. have decided to distance the company from the ad, because… corporations.

So, boooooo, Nissan. Don’t be surprised if the next piñata my people come up with is one of your own Carlos Ghosn.

Ridley Scott to Make Movie About El Chapo, Of Course

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ChapoSimpsons

Well, that was fast.

According to The Internet, Hollywood director Ridley Scott is teaming up with studio giant Fox to produce a novel paralleling the life of escaped Mexican drug lord Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzman.

Details are still sketchy, but Mexican twitteratti are already full of awesome ideas.

The Mexican Flag Flies in Paris, and NOT Because I’m Here

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MexicanFlagsinParis

… But because moronic French President François Holland had the “brilliant” idea of inviting Enrique Peña Nieto as guest of honor at the military parade and other ceremonies marking France’s July 14 national holiday.

I don’t know you but I feel like throwing a month-old baguette on the heads of Holland, Peña Nieto, his wife and their 490+ entourage, who landed on this country just to eclipse this blogger’s visit.

Merde!

 

Via: France 24

One has to be Pretty ‘Desperado’ to Drink this Thing

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La Beer + Le Tequila = Le Guácala
Beer + Tequila = Le Guácala

The French might have some of the best wines in the world, but when it comes to packaged cocktails, they are not exactly Le top.

I found the French youth to be particularly fond of Desperados, a tequila, beer, lemon, cactus (yep) concoction that is for sale pretty much everywhere.

I love the French, especially because of this, so I won’t be on their case.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Dijon, France 2015

 

French Café Google Translates Menu. Hilarity Ensues

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MenusFranciaThe owners of the Café Cordial in Paris’ Opera District are very nice people. Not only do they make sure to mumble some English words for the crowds of American visitors who show up there everyday without speaking a word of French; but they even go out of their way to translate their menu not in one but in two languages.

While some of the English translations in their menu is OK (I just said “OK,”) it is clear that they got lost in the [Google] Spanish translation.

Here are some hilarious examples.

BLOGGER’S NOTE: Apologies to the monolingual crowd; this is funny only if you understand both English and Spanish.

1. Croissant = The thing that grows

There’s the translation for croissant as “1 que crece” (literally: one thing that grows) and toast as “brindis,” as in the toast to happiness….

1quecrece

2. Smoked Salmon = The salmon who had too much to smoke

SalmonFumado

3. The Horny Goat that is served over a salutation

CabraCalor

There are several more yet to be highlighted… Be my guest and find them yourselves, will you? I’m too busy dealing with the country’s Happy Hours.

Photos: Laura Martínez, Paris 2015

‘Le Burrito’ at this French Joint Will Give you ‘Le Diarrhée’

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CuisineMexicaine

Fresh Burritos, a “fine” establishment in the heart of Lille, France, promises (in French) to serve you 100% Fresh Burritos (in English) and will prepare everything in front of your eyes! (yes, with an exclamation point!)

I was tempted for a minute, but then I realized Le menu looks suspiciously similar to any bad Mexican faire á l’américaine: I’m afraid the 4.90 euro combo of La boisson, les patatas, le cookie and le mini burrito will properly give me Le diarrhée.

… And don’t get me started on the non-descript orange sauce-like thing in the background.

So… merci, but non merci!

LeMenu1Photo: Laura Martínez, Lille, France 2015