Somebody Should Have Consulted me Before Marketing This *Thing* to Children
Category: Language
Mexican Daily Jumps on the ‘White Supremacy’ Bandwagon, Because Nothing Makes Sense Anymore
Not Photoshop. Not an Internet meme. This is the actual front page of today’s sports section of Reforma, one of Mexico’s largest daily newspapers. In case you were wondering, the “white supremacy” (in this instance) is that of the Real Madrid after it beat Barcelona 2-0 on Wednesday night. They wear white uniforms, get it? Ha Ha Ha.
Anyway, I believe I don’t need to tell you how timely the above headline is as it comes on the heels of the deadly mass riots organized by white nationalists — and self-described Neo-nazis — in Charlottesville, Virginia this past weekend.
Good job, Reforma… [SIGH]
Hat tip: @jrisco
Greetings from the Land of ‘Fantacy,’ — a.k.a. La La Land
This blogger had to make a rush visit to check up on her fellow Mexicans on the West Coast. Which means you’ll probably be seeing more California-related postings than necessary.
Culver City, CA. 2017
Move Over, ‘Guardians of the Galaxy;’ Mexico Wants you to See ‘Guardianes de la Galatzia’ Instead
It is becoming increasingly difficult to keep blogging, when Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Stories et al keep beating me to the punch, like, by the second. But there are things that are just so beautiful that they deserve to be immortalized in this venerable, non-for-profit, read-by-nobody blog. And this is one of them.
So there. Enjoy. And repeat after me: “Mexicans: How can anyone not love us?”
Trump’s White House Tweets in what it Thinks is the Spanish Language
It’s been over five months since the tragic day President Donald Trump took over the White House, and yet it seems determined to keep ignoring Spanish speakers. Or at least that’s what one can surmise after reading the tweets coming out of @LaCasaBlanca, the White House’s Spanish twitter account, which is a mix of bad Spanish with even worse Spanglish.
The above annotations (by the editors of The Associated Press) are only a small fraction of the horror that this thing is, not to mention that many tweets were actually sent out in English, because why bother?
The @LaCasaBlanca Twitter handle was restored in February after having disappeared following Trump’s inauguration. The Spanish-language Twitter account that was active during the Obama years has moved to @LaCasaBlanca44 and is currently managed by the National Archives and Records Administration (NARA.)
Via: CNET en Español
Group Wants Immigrants to Speak English; Americans not Required to do the Same
The Center for Immigration Studies, a so-called think tank I’ve never heard of, has published a very long report that basically concludes immigrants are illiterate and that Hispanics, in particular, “lag far behind other migrant populations in the U.S. when it comes to developing proficiency in English.”
The study, of course, was widely cited in several conservative publications, notably the Drudge Report (duh) and even gathered enough steam to call for an end of political correctness and launch a national Speak English Initiative.
“The importance of English literacy cannot be overstated,” wrote Jason Richwine, the author of the study and yet another person unknown to this blogger. “Without language proficiency, immigrant families will find it difficult to succeed in the mainstream of American society, and high rates of English illiteracy may be a sign of poor immigrant assimilation.”
In other words, as Mrs. Palin has warned us repeatedly: If you, people, want to be here… let’s speak American!
TAKE IT AWAY, SARAH!
Today in Awesome English to Spanish Translations…
The above sign was spotted at a posh resort, but I’m pretty sure they did not use Google to translate the text into Spanish. I literally just pasted the English text into my Google Translate app, and it came up with a pretty decent Por favor, apague las duchas cuando haya terminado.
[See below]
So here’s a piece of advice for English-speaking hotel owners out there: If you must choose between your high-school Spanish and Google Translate… Go with the latter.
¡GRACIAS!
Tandurero = The Mexican Guy who Runs your Tandoori Oven
Photo: Carolina González
Parisian Eatery Features “Original French Tacos,” Because it’s 2017 and Nothing Makes Sense Anymore
Remember Paris real authentic Mexican restaurant or the super popular Le Guacamole version Grandé?
Well, Parisians have outdone themselves and are going all in with the whole We-Too-Can-Make-Original-Tacos.
Introducing O’Tacos, “Original French Tacos” that you get to make yourself, or so I can surmise from their logo featuring something that looks like La Pyramide de Louvre — or a tortilla chip, I’m really not sure.
Anyhow, as any pompous French would tell you: C’est quoi ce truc?
Photo: Europe Taco Correspondent, @KentGerman
Want to Brush up on your Spanish? CamSoda’s Hot Girls and Live Webcams Are here to Help
Working in tech has its perks, including getting outrageous pitches in your Inbox that will make you go WHAT?!
Enter, Camsoda, a new entertainment/webcam platform that prides itself of being “the first-ever adult language-learning service that combines multilingual cam models and cutting edge translation technology to make learning a new language fun and sensual.”
I am going to spare you the graphic details, but if you’re so inclined in taking up a super sensual language, say Spanish, you can head over here.
Oh, and by the way: What if we, the ladies, want to learn a language too? Where are the hot machos?
WARNING: NSFW
Univision Preps Series about El Chapo, Because Drug Lords Bring Good Ratings
It is not a secret that Univision ratings are tanking, and its telenovelas are no longer as popular as they once were. So the gigantic, media company is trying something a bit more risqué: A dramatic series about — what else? — El Chapo, Mexico’s most notorious drug lord, currently serving time (and learning English) in a Brooklyn prison.
The role of El Chapo will be played by Marco de la O, an actor this blogger had never heard of before and one that looks a bit more like a mustachioed version of Jim Carrey, if you asked me.
But I digress. The upcoming series is only the latest example of Hispanic television’s obsession with Latin American drug lords, which might be a pest to society, but provide TV outlets with sweet, coveted ratings.
El Chapo will premiere in the U.S. on Univision on April 23 and this blogger will be watching — of course.
Via: Univision
Reader Calls me Traitor, Asks me to Go Back to Mexico 😢
BONUS: This one is also a Martínez!
El Chapo Is Learning English, and I Have a Few Tips for Him
As you probably know by now, Mexico’s most notorious Bad Hombre, Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán, is finally serving time on this side of the border, more specifically in a New York City prison that has been described as Brooklyn’s Abu Ghraib.
But if you were the least worried about him, you should know that he’s not only doing well, but, according to Univision, he has even taken up English lessons.
I’m not even sure why anybody living in New York City needs to learn English (last time I checked, everyone around me was Mexican and everything was in damn Spanish!) Besides, I bet his captors/teachers are not precisely Shakespeare scholars, so if my paisano is really serious about this thing, there are a few methods that might help, including the lotería one or this other one by Unforgettable Languages.
However, if everything fails, this blogger would be happy to jump on the subway and personally bring him some additional reading material, starting — perhaps – with my favorite one. 👇🏽
You never know when you’re going to need the extra help, right?
Mexicans in this Disney-Pixar Trailer Sound a lot like Spaniards
With much fanfare, Disney-Pixar on Wednesday released the first teaser trailer of Coco, an upcoming animated film about “a 12-year-old aspiring Mexican musician, who embarks on a magical trip in the Land of the Dead.”
While many of the voices in the English-language movie will be done by Mexicans or Mexican American actors (including Gael García Bernal, Anthony Gonzalez and Benjamin Bratt) I couldn’t help but cringe at this other “Spanish” version I found on the Web, one apparently hailing from Spain, which makes all these Mexicans sound a lot like coming out of a Marisol movie.
Coco will hit theaters on November 22, 2017 and you’ll be well advised to watch the English-language trailer in this link and NOT the one below.
The ‘Spanish Feminist T-shirt’ Fails to Speak Proper Spanish
Human, an online retailer that “believes that every printed object can be a mechanism to declare identity and belonging,” would be well advised to double check their Spanish copy before plastering whatever on their t-shirts, mugs and other accessories.
Take the Spanish Feminist T-shirt, which features nonsensical Spanish copy which — I assume — is an attempt to translate the phrase: This is what a feminist looks like.
Seriously, guys? I mean, even Google Translate does a better job with simple phrases like that.
(Don’t know how to say it properly? Well, HIRE A TRANSLATOR!)
Hat tip: @conz
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