You Guys! It’s National Menudo Month in America

HAPPY MONTH… YOU!

Marketers are one restless bunch.

Not content with giving us National  Taco *and* Vodka Day, National Guacamole Day, Cinco de Mayo and all those wonderful faux culinary celebrations, a California brand of canned “Mexican food” informs me we’re in the midst of National Menudo Month.

Per Juanita’s Food:

Turns out there is so much to celebrate, that the brand in question is launching a national competition to find the BEST MENUDO RECIPE — and to crown the King/Queen of Menudo in two states!

According to the rules of this solemn competition, participants are being asked to bring their homemade menudo to one of the 6 regional menudo tasting events in Texas and California.

The homemade menudo winner in each city will get a $1,000 prize, which should be enough to buy the new iPhone X (without a protective case, that is) –or dozens of Juanita’s Food spicy canned menudo on Amazon.com.

So, now you know.

Enjoy National Menudo Month while I go hang myself.

Mexico Is in Mourning — Again — and Mexicans Have Come Together as One — As Always

September 19, 2017: The day Mexicans came together — again

On September 19, 1985, at around 7:19 a.m. a powerful earthquake struck Mexico City, toppling buildings and killing over 10,000 people in a matter of hours. I was 16, and had (almost miraculously) made it to 7:00 a.m. class for a biology partial exam. Needless to say, the exam never took place. The two-story building where my school was located began shaking pretty badly. We panicked. My teacher was crying hysterically. We were directed to evacuate immediately and move to a nearby park where we huddled up shaking, crying, following news updates on a transistor radio; listening to nothing but the somber voice of the venerable Jacobo Zabludovsky.

Thirty-two years later, on the morning of September 19, 2017, as Mexicans remembered that very awful day, tragedy struck again: A 7.1-magnitud earthquake struck near Mexico City, toppling many buildings and killing dozens of people (including little children,) unleashing chaos in an already chaotic capital.

My entire family lives in Mexico City, where I was born and raised and which was badly hit on both occasions, and while they’re all safe and sound (thank god,) so many others have not been so fortunate: At press time, many people were still trapped under crumbling buildings, and many, many others were unaccounted for.

I’m writing this from San Francisco, where I’m spending the week for work and feeling pretty helpless for not being able to be there physically, helping out. But if this new Mexican tragedy serves any purpose, let it be a reminder that Mexicans are a people with a huge heart that, in moments like this will come together as one, regardless what the so-called leader of the free-world would want you to believe.

If Mexicans are good at something is to know how to go about when the going gets tough — and, boy we’ve had it tough, like, forever.

As Twitter would say: #FuerzaMéxico

Mexican Independence: Too Many Fiestas, Too Little Time

I don’t know about you, but I do take national holidays very seriously, especially when it comes to drinking and eating like there’s no tomorrow.

So, in celebration of my relatively recent double-citizenship bonanza and the upcoming anniversary of Mexico’s Independence, this blogger will be pulling all her U.S.-based resources to list the very best stuff you can buy/do on THIS SIDE of the border so you feel as if you were on the OTHER side of the border.

Now… I’ll be posting some actual goodies later this week (I’m exhausted, you know?), but for now, I’d like to kick off this year’s festivities with the colorful invite (above) I just received from the Mexican Consulate in New York, which makes it clear our Ángel de la Independencia is as tall as the Empire State Building *and* the Freedom Tower themselves.

So there you go, suckers, ¡Viva México, cabrones!

Mexicans Engineer Giant Babies to Go Over Trump’s Wall

Make Mexicans Grandotes Again! #MMGA

The media might try to convince you that the above is the work of some obscure French artist protesting DACA and all. But according to my (very reliable) sources, this is actually part of an ongoing scientific Mexican experiment to breed giant babies that will go over Trump’s wall more easily.

See? We’ve been working on several alternatives for quite some time now…

Via: NPR

And now… ‘Chiles en Nogada’ in a Box: Because Nothing Is Sacred Anymore

What the hell is this?

Move over, tamales en bolsita…

Mexican “food” corporation Dysal S.A. de C.V. — which caters to clients including Walmart and Costco, of course — has come up with this abomination: Ready-to-microwave chiles en nogada… in a box, which I’m sure will be soon available on Amazon.com and the like.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll go hang myself.

This Woman Protesting the End of DACA Is My Spirit Animal

Chancla Power on Display

Americans from all walks of life took to the streets Tuesday, Sept. 5, 2017 to protest Donald Trump’s cruelest decision to date: To kill DACA, a program implemented by the Obama administration that granted undocumented children protection from deportation as well as permits to be able to work legally in the US.

The decision sparked nationwide protests, including one outside the Trump Tower in the heart of New York City where dozens of protesters were arrested. Among the brave — and most hilarious — protesters was the woman above, who had a clear message for Donald Trump (or rather his Twitter handle.)

Photo via: @NYSYLC

Having Solved its Most Pressing Issues, Mexico Prepares the World’s Largest Guacamole

How many Mexicans does it take to squash 25,000 avocados?…

I hope I’m not the only one who remembers the world’s largest taco and the unprecedented efforts to save marine life. My country is at it again, this time breaking all world records possible by making a 3-ton guacamole.

Sí, señor, that’s almost 7,000 pounds of pure green deliciousness.

According to my very reliable sources (i.e. The Internet), it took about 1,000 Mexicans to mash up 25,000 avocados and mix them up with onion, tomato and the like.

But before you start judging us, keep in mind that the feat was not only to satisfy our demanding bellies, no señor.

Per Reuters:

The mass mash-up was part entertainment and part politicking, as growers and Mexico make the point that they – and the guacamole loving Americans – have benefited from the North American Free Trade Agreement that is now under threat from U.S. President Donald Trump.

So there. Mexico 1 — El Trompo 0.

Malala Yousafzai Meets Enrique Peña Nieto; Hilarity Ensues

#ItsMalalaNotMaluma

Unless you’ve been living under a rock, I’m sure you are aware that Nobel Prize winner Malala Yousafzai was in Mexico this week as part of a larger “humanitarian” world tour.

On Thursday, while in Mexico, Malala spoke at the Technological Institute of Monterrey in Mexico City and met president Enrique Peña Nieto, who proudly tweeted a picture of the meeting.

Sooner than you can say “infraschorchor,” Mexicans took to Twitter to do what we do best: To mock our fearless leader.

Here are only a few of the tweets that made my Thursday –and still are helping me get through Friday.

IT’S MALUMA NOT MALALA

LET’S SING ALONG

BLAH, BLAH, BLAH… EYEROLL

IS IT CHRISTMAS YET?

OUCH

THURSDAY

OUCH II

KEEPING HER DISTANCE