Month: August 2019

Spectrum Wants you to Believe this Survey is in Spanish

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¿Estrimeando? No, gracias

Spectrum Latino –which I believe is like “regular Spectrum,” but Latino– is determined to engage with its Hispanic consumers across social media. Its latest effort comes in the form of a Twitter survey, in which the company wants to hear our opinions in our own language.

Sort of…

In the survey, posted this week on Spectrum Latino’s Twitter account, the company wants to know what we (i.e. The Hispanics) do with our phones, whether we use them mostly to take pictures, make phone calls, send texts or stream content. But the options are written in a bizarre, non-existing language resulting in words like “estrimeando” and “fotografeando” (presumably “streaming” and “taking photographs.”

Anyhow, here’s the original tweet but, more importantly, the replies, which are gold:

Mattel Preps a ‘Barbie Día de Muertos,’ Because Mexican Barbie and Barbie Frida Kahlo Weren’t Enough

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Come November, there’s one thing that really, really, gets on my nerves (besides pumpkin-spice stuff, of course) and that is America’s obsession with the Mexican tradition known as Día de Muertos (basically Day of the Dead) or as some gringos dare calling it: Mexico’s Halloween.

Anyhow, in a move that I can only interpret as spite –and to mess up with me and my fellow Mexicans– Mattel on Tuesday announced the upcoming launch of a Day of the Dead-themed Barbie to be called –what else?– Barbie Día de Muertos. Duh.

According to an unnecessarily long press release: Barbie Día de Muertos will feature a “long, embroidered dress decorated with flowers and butterflies. The final touch is completed by a crown with the iconic monarch butterflies and the cempasúchitl flower to honor, in every way, the symbols and offerings of this emblematic Mexican tradition.”

And I thought Barbie Frida Kahlo was pathetic. Now if you excuse me, I’m off to find a non-pumpkin-spiced triple shot of mezcal or something.

[SIGH]

Via: Yahoo News

Eva Longoria to Direct Movie about Flamin’ Hot Cheetos. Yay!

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Spicy snacks and Latinos in Hollywood? Count me in!

Eva Longoria (aka this blogger’s favorite retroacculturated Latina) has landed the directing gig of movie about Richard Montanez, none other than the creator of the spicy Flamin’ Hot Cheetos snack.

The Fox Searchlight biopic will tell the story of Montanez as he went from working as a janitor at Frito-Lay to achieve the American Dream (namely, to create a very spicy botana for the hungry masses.)

According to press reports, Montanez’ spicy creation was reportedly “inspired by the flavors of his community, helped revitalize the company and disrupted the food industry, creating a pop culture phenomenon that continues today.” Because, if there’s something Latinos (especially Mexicans) are good at is at spicing up the lives of others.

Say what you will about Mrs. Longoria or Cheetos. I’m all up for spicy and more Latinos (retroacculturated or not) in Hollywood.

Via: CNN

Being Hispanic in America Used to Be Challenging; Now It’s Outright Dangerous 😱

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I’m not going to lie: These days –after many, many years living on this side of the border– I’ve become increasingly uneasy about doing things that I normally would do in public: Speak Spanish, wear hoop earrings, say outloud I’m Mexican a mucha honra, etc. etc.

The reason? As I keep saying on Twitter, being a minority in America used to be difficult, yes, but now it’s just plain dangerous.

Barely days after an anti-Mexican nutcase shot dozens of people in a Walmart in El Paso, Texas, many of them fatally, another member of the “I Am a White Dude Who Hates Hispanics” clan was arrested after making a series of social media threats against Hispanics in the Miami area.

According to multiple press reports, Eric Lin, a Maryland native, sent a bunch of threatening messages on Facebook professing his nazi beliefs, and vowing to exterminate the entire “Latin Race” [sic] which he also referred to as “rabid dogs.”

Unsurprisingly, Mr. Lin then went on to praise the “great president” of this nation, who as we all know kicked off his presidential campaign by calling us criminals, drug-dealers and rapists.

Coincidence? Ummmmmm….

Thanos Twerks around Tacos and Tortas in the World’s Most Amazing Commercial

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A restaurant in Boca del Río, Veracruz has found a winning combination to sell its products: Footage from Avengers: Infinity War, tacos, tortas and a super fun evil Thanos that twerks to show his penchant for Mexican food.

A commercial posted on the Facebook account of Takesabroso, shows Thanos delivering his now-famed deadly snap as he dissolves half of life on Earth. But instead of retreating to a quiet life until the Avengers come back seeking revenge, he is inspired to twerk around delicous tacos and tortas.

Watch the original tweet where this appears before Marvel’s lawyers get on this…

Via: TaKeSabroso

The World’s Best Salsas also Boast the World’s Best Name

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Filing under ‘Mexicans: How can anyone not like us?’

Mexican meat market Super Carnicería la 18 in Tamaulipas claims to serve The World’s Best Salsas, a claim this blogger is not able to independently corroborate. However, one thing is undisputable: The Madafaker Salsa Verde and The Sanababish Salsa Roja have the World’s Best Name Ever. Ever.

Hat tip: Salsa correspondent –and friend of Roberto Carlos– @LeChanclé

‘Fresh Mexican Waters Any Flavor?’… Yeah, Mexicans Will Understand…

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After all these years in “America” I still haven’t found an accurate way to translate “aguas mexicanas” into English. Some would say “juice” (no, they’re not really juices) while others insist on “ice-tea”. Nope. Tampoco.

Google Translate, of course, doesn’t help either, so I think my paisanos in this Harlem deli are right: Aguas frescas mexicanas has got to be “Fresh Mexican Waters.”

Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem 2019