The ‘Cinco Barrios Skateboard’ Is la Más ‘Fresca’ de NYC!

SkateboardNYC

My friend Diego Olivé spotted this “cute cultural hodgepodge-Latinocaliente skateboard” at a local sports store in Union Square, so I wasted no time in asking his permission to steal this beauty. And why not? It so perfectly embodies everything that is awesome about living in New York City.

[And to think there are still some morons out there who spit at multiculturalism and/or bilingualism…]

Photo: Diego Olivé (New York, NY, 2013)

It’s Downtown vs. Uptown: ‘Men in White’ are not All Created Equal

It is Fleet Week in Manhattan, señores, and this blogger went out to flirt do some serious research about sailors and the like.

The city was taken May 23 with men and women in uniform, wandering New York City’s streets in search of some grounded fun after months at sea. After an entire afternoon flirting with photographing the Men in White around downtown, I went back to my humble home all the way uptown to find yet another group of men in white.

The latter, though, were not coming off a warship or anything, but seemed to be busy waiting for work outside my local bodega.

DOWNTOWN

UPTOWN

As for these fellows’ white  outfit… well, I still have to figure that one out.

It’s Official: Mexicans Take Over New York City

In yet another sign that Mexicans are indeed taking over the Big Apple, a trajinera has been spotted in and around Flushing Meadows Corona Park.

See? We, mexicans, don’t only want our carnitas here, we also want to move around in our traditional means of transportation.

Well, actually, the trajinera thing is a piece of moving art that is part of this year’s Celebrate Mexico Now Festival. Never seen one in real life? Here is your chance, newyorkers!

Photo: Stolen from the Web site of the Queens Museum

Santas Trompetas! Mariachi-Clad Santas Take Over New York City

One of the many perks of living in New York City is that, no matter where you go -or what mood you’re in- you will always bump into a band of authentic mariachis wearing Santa hats. Well, maybe not always, but it happened to me this week at the unbearably touristy, and easily avoidable Columbus Circle shopping mall.

Oh, and in case you’re wondering: that thing showing behind the glass is one of Salvador Dalí’s famous melting watches. How cool is this!

Coño! I’ll Never Become a Teacher in NYC

I have found yet another reason why a school will never hire me to teach anything…. anywhere.

According to the AP, Carlos Garcia, a New York City high-school teacher, has been suspended and fined with $15,000 for what school officials say was “misconduct for using it in his Manhattan classroom,” in other words, for saying the word “coño” out loud.

If uttering a word such as “coño” is considered “misconduct” in a classroom, this blogger has absolutely no future in the field of education. So without further ado, I am withdrawing my candidacy to assist Ms. Catherine P. Black in her new gig as NYC School Czar, even though she looks to be as clueless to handle the task as I am.

¡Coño!

Mexican Entertainment Takes Over the ‘Big Apple’

Not content with scaring the bejesus out of white families around the nation’s freeways, the Mexicans are now taking over the heart of the Big Apple: Times Square.

Open 7 days a week, the Mexican Bar -and its scantily clad señoritas– is waiting for you to celebrate its gran “inaguración,” which is kind of like an “inauguración” but way, way better.

So what are YOU waiting for? Come have some real Latin fun! This joint is 100% mMexicano [sic].