On the heels of Donald Trump’s Cinco de Mayo Tweeter brouhaha, my people (i.e. Mexicans on Twitter) used a combination of Photoshop and hilarity to give Trump’s disgusting Taco Bowl a real Mexican flavor. The result was a thing of beauty.
Tamales, anyone?
As if it was possible…
Hate me more [ódiame más]
La última y nos vamos…
From the archives of “Mexicans: How can anyone not like us?”
I seriously don’t know what’s worse, if Donald Trump tweeting a photo of himself on Cinco de Mayo eating a Taco Bowl (whatever that is) to say he loves Hispanics or the avalanche of serious, “investigative news pieces” from “real journalists” attempting to get to the bottom of things.
Seriously, what’s there to get to the bottom of? That the disgusting Walled-Taco-Thing was purchased in a cafe instead of restaurant? That Trump really didn’t tweet that thing today, because he’s in another city?
Man,I miss that time when stuff like this belonged to my stupid blog and not the realm of “investigative journalism.”
You can say anything about Mexicans, but you can’t accuse us of a lack of imagination.
The above image — which started making the rounds on the Internet on Tuesday — quickly became the object of some of the best memes this week. Nobody really knows the story behind this photo, nor why this woman’s friend had to be so protective of her privacy at a Banamex ATM, but it didn’t really matter. Mexican Twitter quickly jumped in. And it was hilarious.
I will be uploading some more pics later today, but in the meantime take a look at some of my personal favorite memes around #LadyCajero. [Click on the arrows to continue]
Argentina’s TyC Sports channel is using extracts from Trump’s infamous “wall” speech to propose a wall in hopes to stop Argentina’s national team from coming to this year’s Copa América.
“These are total killers,” says Trump, as the video shows Ángel Di María lashing the ball into the the net. “These are not the nice, sweet little people that you think,” Trump continues. “We need to build a wall, and we need to build it fast!”
Watch the spot below, and leave your comments… (Oh, and try to be nice to Argentina.)
“The group was protesting both sides of thelandmark immigration case that will decide whether or not President Barack Obama abused his executive power on immigration with his plan to prevent millions of illegal immigrants from being deported.”
It’s a full seven days before May 5th, but the marketing nonsense around the American festivity known as Cinco de Mayo is in full swing.
Take Kane’s Donuts, an “iconic Massachusetts doughnut shop,” which has sent out a press release (yes, a press release!) to tout its latest delicious concoction: a boozy-inspired, margarita flavored, green-glazed doughnut.
Fortunately, this thing will be available for a “limited time only” and this blogger hopes it will be limited to residents of Massachusetts.
Next time you find yourself thinking that recycling is useless, watch the following video, which unequivocally proves that recycling (i.e. using tech tools to tweak hate speech) can actually turn garbage into something better.
Mike Pape, a Republican dude running for Kentucky’s first Congressional district, has released a new TV ad featuring what he thinks are Latino immigrants, complete with Mario Bros.-like mustaches and fake accents.
In the :30 TV spot (below) three men, presumably undocumented immigrants attempting to cross the border into the U.S., are running to a fence and cutting through it when they reveal their very specific political plans: To help stop Donald Trump and Ted Cruz but also Pape himself, because he’s going to help those two build a wall and repeal Obamacare and stuff.
The whole thing is so hilarious it’s hard to be offended. In fact, my favorite part of this whole thing are the English subtitles, because — in case you haven’t noticed — these guys are actually SPEAKING ENGLISH!
In yet another sign that bashing Donald Trump is now a national sport, a pizza and wine bar in St. Louis, MO will host a special Cinco de Mayo celebration (on May 7th) featuring a gigantic Donald Trump piñata.
According to a very long press release:
The El Trumpo Piñata will be on display at Yaquis Pizza and Wine Bar (2728 Cherokee, St. Louis, MO 63118) in promotion of their Cinco de Mayo celebration where, upon dusk (approximately 9:00 pm) on Saturday, May 7th, 2016, kids will be able to battle the El Trumpo piñata in an effort to grab as much candy that falls out.
The St.Louis, MO event comes on the heels of a similar Chicago announcement, proving that bashing El Trumpo is no longer a exclusive privilege of Mexicans in Mexico.
So, without further ado, here’s Francis Rodriguez, restaurateur and creator of the El Trumpo Piñata talking about the upcoming event and why Trump is a “very dangerous” person.
‘Ethan and Alex are sent to Peru to live with the Ashaninka tribe for crimes of laziness and being spoilt’
What to do with lazy, spoilt, disrespectful teenagers who do nothing but play video games all day long?
Send them to Peru, of course!
That is basically the premise of Tribal Teens, a reality TV show hailing form England that sends entitled little brats to live in “dire conditions” and face “life-changing challenges” in some of the world’s most remote tribes.
Among these are the Ashaninka indians in the Peruvian Amazon, who for some screwed up reason ended hosting not only these spoiled, disrespectful teens, but an army of television producers, cameramen, make-up artists, etc., etc.
Seriously, dude. What did the Ashaninka do to deserve this punishment? Can somebody please fill me in?
Chicago, the city with not one but Two Donald Trump toilets, is the proud host of the upcoming #ThumpTrump Cinco de Mayo Bash, a fiesta organized by a Lakeview beer & bourbon bar featuring a giant Trump piñata.
Like Mr. Trump would say, I think it’s terrific to give Chicagoans a chance to bash the Republican presidential front-runner, too. (Why would Mexicans have all the fun?)
I don’t know about you, but I’m already booking a plane ticket to the Windy City: Beer, bourbon, a Trump piñata… How can you go wrong?
Washington, D.C.-based online pub The Hill has apparently discovered the power of my people (i.e. The Hispanics,) so it’s launching The Hill Latino, which I suppose is just like regular The Hill, but Latino…
Stories include — of course — spicy hot headlines featuring Salma Hayek (aka the Lesbian taco.)
If you thought Hollywood was running out of awesome ideas, think again. Coming this summer to a movie theatre near you is The Sausage Party, an “adult animated film with talking food,” starring Seth Rogen as Frank, a sausage who lives in a supermarket waiting to be chosen. Yep.
But because American supermarkets — and dinner tables — would be nothing without my people (i.e. Flaming Hot Mexicans,) The Sausage Party also stars Mexican bombshell Salma Hayek who will play the role of — what else? — a Lesbian taco. (Don’t ask.)
It’s a pity no more Mexicans have been cast, since I would have enjoyed a kitchen scene of horny jumping beans. But maybe that’s in store for the 2017 sequel: The Chorizo Fiesta
Anyhow, here’s a trailer of this thing, alas, sans lesbian tacos:
Awwww, America: The land of the free, home of the brave — and the Milwaukee Taco Fest — is also the place to go to advance your career.
Take the above job opportunity hailing from — where else? — Florida, where some dude needs to hire 4 women for an adult business Cinco de Mayo event. Required are two “promo models” and two “ass models,” who will be paid $420/hr and $250/hr, respectively, for the gig. Ladies must be “fun, friendly and not uptight,” so boring, unfriendly and anxious señoritas, please refrain.
I don’t know about you, but I’m super interested in this thing, so I’m off to polish my… resume.
Let’s see if I can finally make some money off my Latin talents.