Category Archives: Food

Tequila Cazadores Wants me to Put a ‘Summer of Tacos Calendar’ on my Desk –for Some Reason

Posted on May 13, 2019 by

Marketing professionals are one creative bunch. Not content with bringing to market some awesome, creative and stupid products (i.e. the avocado toast sneakers or the Throw Throw Burrito Game) they have now conceived another innovative thing… I give you… the … Continue reading →

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Americans are Putting Avocado on a Stick and I’m Screaming

Posted on May 11, 2019 by

Was this really necessary? The short answer is no, but it seems like Americans in general –and millennials in particular– continue to find ways to ruin everything. According to an unnecessarily long article, this thing was conceived by some dude … Continue reading →

Posted in Food, Guacala, Marketing & Advertising | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Hold on to your Sombreros: Cinco de Mayo 2019 Has Begun!

Posted on April 29, 2019 by

No matter how many bizarre holidays Americans come up with, Cinco de Mayo will forever be my favorite. And not only because it’s an excuse to drink all day and yell ¡Viva México! while thinking it’s our celebration of Independence (it’s not) but … Continue reading →

Posted in Cinco de Mayo, Fashion, Food, Marketing & Advertising, Mexico, Stupid propositions, Tacos | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Bush’s Beans ‘Cocina Latina’ Products are Making me Very Sad

Posted on April 22, 2019 by

American corporations will stop at nothing when marketing “Latin-inspired” food to my always-hungry people (i.e. The Hispanics.) The most recent example of this is Bush’s Beans Comida Latina, which features a product line of prepared beans –and hominy– just like … Continue reading →

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Americans Insist on Wrapping Themselves in Tortilla Blankets

Posted on April 5, 2019 by

Move over tortilla towel, here comes the tortilla blanket, the most recent addition to what I like to call Nonsense American Products (NAPS.) The latest tortilla-themed thing is a microfiber blanket that can be yours for as little as $39.99!) … Continue reading →

Posted in Awkard homages, Fashion, Food, Marketing & Advertising, Pinches Hipsters, Stupid propositions, Tacos | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

The Avocado Toast Sneakers are Here, Because Hipsters are Determined to Ruin Everything

Posted on April 1, 2019 by

Not content with having ruined meals –and jacked up the price of avocados to ridiculous levels– American hipsters are at it again; this time with a plan to ruin footware as well. Yes, my friends, according to multiple reports, the … Continue reading →

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Do you Like Hummus but *Love* Avocado? The Guacammus is Here!

Posted on March 13, 2019 by

Crazy Fresh Products, a company that guarantees “fresh-cut and ready-to-eat veggies and salsas,” has concocted the Guacammus, a blend of guacamole and hummus that is sure to make hipster-millennials salivate. This thing was last seen at a local store for … Continue reading →

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