Mexican President Taps Hernán Cortés to Top National Guard Post in 2024 – Because Mexico

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ok not the 2024 Hernán Cortés, but still… who the hell would name their child Hernán Cortés?

Mexico’s President Claudia Sheinbaum is truly a first in many ways. Not only she is my country’s first female president, but she is also the first with a Jewish background. But to make things even more interesting, this week she appointed a new interim commander to take over the country’s increasingly powerful Guardia Nacional.

His name? Hernán Cortés, of course, because Mexico is magical and I hope it will stay this way.

Via: Gobierno de México

Mexican Independence Day Is Around the Corner: Show Some Respect and Dress Accordingly

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mexicans

I don’t know about you, but I do take national holidays very seriously, especially when it comes to drinking and eating like there’s no tomorrow.

So, in celebration of my second September back in Mexico in years, I’m reposting this series with some of the very best stuff you can buy to wear on September 15 and celebrate your Mexicaness –regardless of where you live.

Please note that some of this stuff is very likely Made in China and will not last another September 15, but who cares? Get them all now, and join me tomorrow in yelling: ¡Viva México, cabrones!

Now, on to the day’s relevant clothing…

The simply-awesome Mexico leggings –and green shoes:

Pobre águila, but OK
Pobre águila, but OK

The more subtle, millennial-oriented Mexican leggings:

Online Leggins

The Mexico-inspired Converse sneakers:

Ideal for when someone yells '¡Ahí viene la migra!'
Ideal for when someone yells ‘¡Ahí viene la migra!’

The Kobe Bryant Mexican Blanket Nike’s

MexicanBlanket2

The Frida Kahlo-themed Converse… Ay!

conversefrida

JD Vance Once Asked: “Are you a Racist? Do you Hate Mexicans?” Hilarity Ensued

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A coupole of years ago, when J.D. Vance was running for Senate, he released an advertisement asking Ohio voters if they were racists and/or if they “hate Mexicans.”

Soon after making its debut across social media, the 30-second spot had amassed more than 300,000 views on Twitter. And this blogger is pretty sure it had to do with Mexicans like herself jumpin in to troll him like only Mexicans can.

Below, some of my fave reactions (starting with yours truly, of course!)

Chente!

Torchy Tacos

At the ballgame

Speak American

Dreadful

Mic drop

Blogger’s note: This post will be updated throughout the day, because ¡qué risa!

Ahí Va Romina, Repartiendo Caramelos Desde el Cielo

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Romina duerme cuando noche; mecida en la luna y desde allá nos reconoce…

If this song is not about her, I don’t know what is…

Romina viaja tierna y nuevade campo a estrellay va subiendo por las teclasdel piano, escalera.
Romina se ha escapado lejostras de un conejo blancoy aunque sabe que la esperanse va jugando.
Romina lleva caramelosque arroja del cieloy cuando llega el aguaceroson dulces los sueños.
Para Romina entre los astroses un jardín el espacioy mientras viva la alegríasu día es largo.
Romina si tuvieras tiempopiensa en mí.
Romina desde que estás lejosno es sencillo ningún juegode los que aprendípara vivir.
Romina canta cuando bajadel monte a algún ríoy cuando llega la mañanalos ojos le miro.
Para Romina una guitarraresonará por siempremientras viva la esperanza
Romina vuelve.
Romina duerme cuando nochemecida en la lunay desde allá nos reconocenos mira sin duda.
Si cuando el sol que da un domingopromete un bello díaserá seguro que contigoRomina ría.
Hat tip: Carla Raygoza

Feeling Lonely on Super Bowl Sunday? Get Yourself some Insta-Mexicans!

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They are festive, colorful and –more importantly– not contagious!

Are you on a tight budget for fancy avocados and still haven’t made any “ethnic-looking” friends?

Worry not!

You can now buy 5-feet-tall Mexican “scene setters,” ready to assemble and give your Super Bowl party a unique fiesta touch. It’s as easy as bashing a piñata! Besides, with the pandemic still in full swing, WHO NEEDS REAL PEOPLE AROUND, ANYWAY?

For only a few bucks, you can pretend to have real Mexicans at your birthday, bautizo, quinceañera, wedding, etc. These Insta-Mexicans are over 5 feet high; they won’t eat all the tamales, nor gulp all the beer or crash in your living room forever.

So, what are you waiting for? Go get your Instant Mexicans ahorita mismo!*

*I bet these are totally Made in China, but just pretend you didn’t read this note at all.

Luis Miguel Now Peddling Healthcare to Latinos, Because Marketing

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In the latest chapter of Bizarre Marketing Endorsements, Luis Miguel (aka El Sol de México) has partnered with Alignment HealthPlan in an effort to celebrate a “commitment to vitality and wellness at every age,” because, as President & CEO Dawn Maroney says:

Together, we’re not just changing how you experience health care; we’re celebrating you. Welcome to a new era of aging.

I don’t know about you, but this thing leaves me feeling like 100 years old, especially when the last LuisMi-endorsed commercial I remember is when this hottie used to look like this:

Hat tip:@lechancle