YOU GUYS! The French are Selling ‘Chichis’ with Chocolate for Only 4.50 Euros

They look like churros, but apparently they’re boobs –or something like that.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Bayeux, France 2019.

Posted in Awkard homages, Food, France, Guacala, Stupid propositions | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

This Christmas Commercial for Funeraria López is the Best Thing Ever

This commercial is the best thing ever. I repeat. The. Best. Thing. Ever.

Merry Christmas

Posted in Latin America, Marketing & Advertising | Tagged | 2 Comments

This Parisian Restaurant Specializes in Latin American Food –Whatever that Means

Their menu must be as big as the continent itself!

This only proves what I’ve been saying, like, forever: The farther you go from Latin America, the more generic our food becomes.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Paris. 2019.

Posted in Awkard homages, Food, France, Latin America, Marketing & Advertising, Stupid propositions | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Dear Americans: Please Take Note, and Hold Down the Fort While I Go on Vacation, Will Ya?

The Real Mexican Food Manifesto

Dear Readers:

I know Twitter, Facebook, Instagram et al have been stealing time and energy from this blogger and I have not been able to keep my promise of posting something here everyday as I used to in the dial-up AOL.com, pre-Zuckerberg era.

And now, as if all that weren’t tragic enough, I’ve decided to embark on a late, long vacation in an undisclosed location (check out my Instagram account if you’re REALLY dying to know where I’ll be,) so I won’t be able to update this thing as often as I would like.

That said, I am reaching out to you TODAY to ask for your help in spreading the above manifesto, which will help restore the sacredness of the food from my homeland, and hopefully contravene the terrible transgressions it has endured throughout these years.

I trust you will read –and memorize– the above manifesto and help this blogger put a stop to the nonsense of spreading shredded cheddar on top of stuff and/or mistaking a burrito for a quesadilla or –worse– a corn tortilla for a flour one.

Keep me in your thoughts and prayers and think of me every time you find an authentic enchilada. 🙏🏻

 

Posted in Food, Guacala, Tacos, Why I Love Mexico | 2 Comments

Pablo Escobar’s Brother Launches Foldable Phone; its Marketing Is Something Else

The Escobar Fold: Ideal for your selfies while wearing underwear and showing off your fake boobs…

Roberto De Jesús Escobar Gaviria, the brother of late Colombian drug kingpin Pablo Escobar, has joined the foldable phone fever with the Escobar Fold 1, a $350 device that comes unlocked and claims to be compatible with “all networks” worldwide.

I don’t know about you, but I’m too distracted by these models to pay attention on the thing’s specs, price, durability, gigabytes, chipset, etc. etc. But the ads are mesmerizing. Here are just a couple…

I think there’s a phone here, but I’m not sure…

Via: CNET

Posted in Awkard homages, Fashion, ItsColombiaNotColumbia, Latin America, Marketing & Advertising, You Tube | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

Kia Latino Wants us to Be Thankful… for our Car Specs

Kia Latino, which is like regular Kia but Latino, has given us some marketing jewels in the past, including the use of female mariachis to show they really, really, care about my people (i.e. The Hispanics) and diversity. And now, they want to remind us that Thanksgiving is a great time of the year to be thankful.

Thankful for… the specs of our cars, naturally.

Take the following Twitter ad, in which we find our “typical” Latino family passing around –what else?– tamales during what looks to be a very special Thanksgiving meal. The exchange (in an accented Spanish) goes something like this:

-Ramiro, what are you thankful for?

-I’m thankful for the engine, and its 240 horsepower; the heated seats and the heated steering wheel… an 8-inch smart touchscreen…

[DIALOGUE FADES]

I’m a bit suspicious about these particular Latinos as I would only be thankful for tamales. But hey, that’s me!

Now. What are YOU thankful for?

 

Posted in Marketing & Advertising, Mexico, Music, Stupid propositions, Technology | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Tired of ‘Regular Thanksgiving?’ Make it a Latino Thanksgiving

Photo: Saveur

Photo: Saveur

Let’s be honest: Just as any other holiday, Thanksgiving has become mostly another good reason to eat and drink in excess (at least in my case.)

But if a 3 pm “dinner” of turkey, pumpkin pie and cranberry sauce seems a little boring to you, you can always throw a “Latino Thanksgiving,” which basically means a three-day smörgåsbord of lechón, tamales, arroz, frijoles, elotetostones, tequila, poker games — and plenty of dancing and family drama.

If any of the above sounds exciting enough, you are in luck.

Here are 8 SIMPLE STEPS to turn your regular Thanksgiving into a Latino one:

  1. Turkey? Who eats turkey? Run to the closest bodega and pick the biggest lechón available. Roast and stuff an apple on its mouth while you’re at it.
  2. Cranberry sauce? We don’t even know what that is. Get a mojo going or start a guajillo marinade for said lechón
  3. Start with plenty of tamales and make sure to serve rice, beans, gandules, tostones and/or plantains on the side.
  4. Pumpkin? Who eats pumpkin? Really. Pumpkin is only good when you use its flowers to make one of these.
  5. Start serving dinner at 10 pm, because, really, who has dinner at 3 pm?
  6. Once the meal is over, and liters of alcohol have been consumed, be ready for your mothertía or abuela to start crying inconsolably over you not visiting more often, etc.
  7. No football. Who watches football? It’s not like it’s fútbol… Take out the baraja, the poker chips and open up the wallet.
  8. Turn up the music and dance like maniacs all night long. And do not worry about thy neighbor. Thy neighbor should be thankful to have a Latino family around. After all, what is Thanksgiving if not an opportunity to say gracias?

A Spanish-language version of this blog post first appeared on Univision.com

Posted in Food, Guacala, Tacos | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment