Barbie Befriends Latino, Learns to Salsa, Because Hispanic Heritage Month!

In which Rafa & Barbie inform us they can travel to Puerto Rico without needing a passport

It’s only been, like, a day, but brands are already jumping on the Hispanic Heritage Month action. Take Mattel’s most annoying toy, Barbie, who is celebrating by befriending a Latino dude named Rafa who teaches her to –what else? – how to salsa.

This clip is barely a minute, but it has everything I’ve come to expect from these kind of “homages,” namely salsa, abuelas, Tito Puente, Yolanda Rivera and the island of Puerto Rico, where Barbie & Rafa remind us they can travel to without carrying a passport!

Hold on to your sombreros: The 2022 Hispanic Hellish Month is just getting started!

hat tip: @LeChancle

The NFL Changes “N” to “Ñ” to Give Logo an “Unmistakable Latin Flavor”

Remember that nonsensical trend of putting “eñes” where they don’t belong just to make something look –and sound– more authentically “Latino?”

Well, it looks like salsa makers and Hispanic journalists organizations are not alone in this thing. The latest to jump on the nonsensical “eñe wagon” (or should I say “wagoñ?”) is the National Football League, which has added an “eñe” to give its logo an “unmistakable Latin flavor.”

Ay, dios mío!

I get it. As we “celebrate” the dreaded Hispanic Heritage Month, corporations, politicians and NGOs want to sound all cute and Latin in order to properly pander to my people, but how about learning first to put the “eñe” where it DOES belong? Like in “jalapeño?” for example?

Introducing the Hispanic Lettuce

Throughout a long and not-necessarily successful career covering all-things Hispanic, I’ve encountered all kinds of marketing tactics pitching “culturally-relevant” products to Latinos.

I have been particularly impressed with Kellogg’s honey-flavored Corn Flakes, Oreo’s cream-filled churros, Domino’s Chicken Taco Pizza and even the one and only Hispanic cheese.

However, of all the things out there making us, Latinos, feel right at home here in the U.S., the Hispanic lettuce (found this weekend at a Harlem bodega) takes the cake. Besides, how much do you think this bodega owner spent on targeted media?

Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem, NYC

DC Comics Wants you to Know Green Lantern Is Very Fond of Tamales

Just in time for Hispanic Heritage Month, DC Comics is giving Green Lantern a very Mexican look by… making him carrying a bag of –what else?– tamales!

According to press reports, the original cover featured an homage to Mexican muralist Jorge González Camarena’s La Patria (see image below.) But somehow, the marketing bosses thought it didn’t look quite Mexican enough.

Jorge Molina, the artist himself, confirmed on Twitter that he created the original cover as a homage to González Camarena, but distanced himself from the tamal-themed one that it ended up being promoted.

Yeah, it’s going to be a long, long Hispanic Heritage Month…

The original image was so much better imho

The Hispanic Star Joins Nonsensical Trend of Putting an ‘Ñ’ where it Doesn’t Belong

Excuse me?

Remember that nonsensical trend of putting “eñes” where they don’t belong just to make something look –and sound– more authentically “Latino?”

Well, it looks like salsa makers and Hispanic journalists organizations are not alone in this thing. The latest to jump on the nonsensical “eñe wagon” (or should I say “wagoñ?”) is The Hispanic Star, a non-for-profit organization that seeks to “raise awareness of the contributions of the Hispanic community to the United States.”

According to its latest mailer, the Hispanic Star wants us to SAVE THE DATE and celebrate the 2020 Hipanic Heritage… Mñnth [SIC] which I believe it’s nonsense English for the word “month”.

I get it. As we approach the dreaded Hispanic Heritage Month, corporations, politicians and NGOs want to sound all cute and Latin in order to properly pander to my people, but how about learning first to put the “eñe” where it DOES belong? Like in “jalapeño?” for example?

Oh, and don’t get me started on #ItsPoblanoNotPoblaño

Hispanic Heritage Month is Finally Over; Now Back to your Regular Programming

I don’t know you, but I was frankly getting tired of all this “Hispanics are great,” “Hispanics are awesome,” “We are all Mexicans” rhetoric.

Luckily, the month-long marketing fiesta known as Hispanic Heritage Month is finally over, so media can get their butt back to reporting regular Hispanic stories, in which my people are no longer a colorful, boisterous bunch, but simply “probable cause” for traffic stops, frisks, deportation, etc. To wit.

ProbableCause

So enjoy your next eleven months of non-Hispanic-Heritage. See you in 2016!

via: Daily News

Shakira, Wisin, Wyclef Jean: ‘We are all Mexican and we’re Here to Save you from El Trumpo’

shakMex

I couldn’t make this stuff up if I wanted.

In yet another sign of the circus that the political/entertainment “Hispanic” environment has become, a group of “prominent” Latino musicians (i.e. Emilio Estefan et al) will be getting together to record We’re all Mexican, which according to Billboard magazine:

…. is a celebration of Hispanics and our accomplishments.

I think this basically means the celebration of the accomplishments of Estefan et al but we’ll see.

The track, set to be released later in September, will also include reggaeton singer Wisin, Wyclef Jean and even Spanish-American chef.

Will somebody please shoot me now?

Coffee Mate’s ‘Latin-Inspired Products’ Include Hot, Steamy ‘Abuelita’ -Of Course

SpicySteamyAbuela

Not to be outdone by the likes of Mattel and Oscar Mayer with their Latin-inspired dolls and Hispanic-targeted cold cuts, Nestlé’s Cofee Mate is launching a series of “Latin-inspired products” and promoting them on Twitter with a super inventive Latin handle: #LatinTouch.

Here’s one of Coffee Mate’s pitches on Twitter.

Coffee Mate’s Latin Touch thing includes Nestlé’s popular Mexican Chocolate Abuelita, featuring the great Sara García, who is having, posthumously, a second life as a “hot, steamy” Latina.

Because, aren’t we all?

Hat tip: @latinorebels

♪ ♫ Ojalá que llueva ( McCafé ) en el Campo ♫ ♪

McCafeJLG

Hispanic Heritage Month is in full swing, and with it comes the flurry of pandering Hispanic marketing opportunities to reach my people. From culturally relevant print publications and invitations to celebrate our heritage by eating pizza and drinking Pepsi to taking part in the Miss Gay Hispanidad Beauty Pageant, everyone’s in a fiesta mood. ¡Ajúa!

The latest to join the festive fray is Juan Luis Guerra, the Dominican icon who gave us Bachata Rosa, La Bilirrubina, Si tú te vas and other glorious merengue classics. Guerra has partnered with McDonald’s NYC Metro to take Latinos on a journey of spicy flavor that “will culminate with a surprise concert to be announced at a later date in New York City.”

I don’t know you, but I can’t wait to get my hands on an authentic Hispanic McDonald’s meal and dance to the tune of: ♫ Ojalá que llueva McCafé en el campo…. lah, lah, lah…♪

It’s Hispanic Heritage Month! Time for the ‘Miss Gay Hispanidad’ Beauty Pageant

MissGayHispanidad

Every year, Latinos and non-Latinos across the U.S. celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month, a monthlong extravaganza of all things Latino that has included a bash in the White House (I wasn’t invited;) a Cielito Lindo singing collage over at Southwest Airlines and  -of course- an invitation for Latinos to enjoy their heritage by eating pizza and drinking Pepsi.

This year, though, this blogger would like to take a moment to highlight an upcoming beauty pageant that promises to become the event of the year (in the Dallas area, that is.) It’s the Miss Gay Hispanidad contest, offering Hispanic gays (presumably only men) the opportunity to make $2,000 by presenting themselves in a typical “Latin” outfit, bathing suit or gala dress.

Miss Gay Hispanidad takes place Sept. 26 at -where else?- the Kaliente Discotec [sic.]

Calling on my Hispanic gay friends: Will-You-Please-Take-Me????

Hat tip: Carlos Tourné

Disney Thinks Latinos Like to Dance Cumbia While in Disney

Last time I checked, Latino families and their multiple mocosos loved to go to the Magic Kingdom of Disney to sing, dance and ride along with their non-Hispanic counterparts. But as a gesture to its growing Hispanic clientele, Disney Latino has produced a super-terrific, culturally-relevant video celebrating Hispanic Heritage.

I personally prefer this other Disney-themed cumbia.

But, heck, that’s me!

hat tip: @latinorebels

Southwest Crew Will Sing ‘Cielito Lindo’ to Show Respect, Appreciation for U.S. Hispanics

You gotta give it to corporate marketers for their continuing efforts to lure Hispanics to whatever it is they sell.

Take Southwest Airlines which is kicking off Hispanic Heritage Month by inviting everyone to come together on September 16th and sing Cielito lindo.

Yes, that is correct. On Friday, Sept. 16 Southwest flight attendants and crew will lead passengers in flight, at airport gates and airport ticket counters to join in and sing along. Per a press release sent out today by the airline’s Hispanic ad agency, Dieste:

“This is the way Southwest Airlines, headquartered in Dallas, Texas, found to show their respect and appreciation for the Hispanic community.” 

I don’t know you, but this blogger will feel respected -and very much appreciated- if she were to get cheaper tickets and less stripping and frisking at the airports.

I’m just sayin’ ….

Honor Your Heritage. Eat Pizza. Drink Pepsi. Be Fat

2004.10.01.obese_childrenHispanic Heritage Month is in full swing now, and because there is never a better time to celebrate our heritage, Pizza Patrón has partnered with Pepsi Co. to bring us “!Viva Latino! Pizza Patron y Pepsi Festejan el Mes Patrio” [sic]

Notwithstanding the lack of proper punctuation, the special promotion has been “specifically designed to honor Latin culture” by having us indulge in unhealthy amounts of fast-food and soda.

According to a story in QSR:

With any 2-liter purchase of Pepsi products through September 30, customers will receive a free phone egrip Non-Slip Strip. The egrip […] features the Pizza Patron and Pepsi logos, as well as Pizza Patron’s slogan, “Latin Life, Enjoy.”

Latin Life, Enjoy?

What ever happened to Dr. Manny Alvarez and his Hot Latin Diet?