AMLO Proposes Presidential Jet’s Raffle; Hilarity Ensues

A Mexican upon winning the presidential jet raffle

No, I’m not making this up.

Mexico’s president, Andrés Manuel López Obrador (aka AMLO) has proposed a raffle by the country’s National Lottery to sell the presidential plane. Tickets would go for about $25 dollars apiece, and while we’re not sure yet how the whole process will work, Mexican Twitter has responded as only Mexican Twitter can.

Here are some of my favorite reactions from Twitter Mexico.

Glorious ride

Who wants a cachito?

 

Going to work in style

Ready for the raffle

See y’all suckers!

Avión presidencial

Via: CNET en Español

José José Is Dead –and I Have nothing Funny to Say

You probably don’t know this, but José José (né José Rómulo Sosa Ortiz) was not only one of my favorite Mexican singers; he was pretty much responsible for a lot of crying during my yesteryears. So many of my memories from Mexico are intrinsically linked to a José José song: The first time I got drunk (on a disgusting bottle of Padre Kino white wine;) my first kiss; my first heart break…

I don’t exaggerate when I say José José was the soundtrack of my family life back in Mexico growing up. And, just like Juan Gabriel, another Mexican grande who left too soon, José José was already a staple in my home way before the hipsters or younger people discovered his beautiful voice. Awwww, the parties in San Pedro de los Pinos with us singing out loud to the tune of No me digas que te vas, El triste, Gavilán o paloma or Si me dejas ahora, my mom’s personal favorite.

I’m not sure heaven exists, but if it does my mom is in for a big fiesta with two giants who –just like her– left us way too soon.

Go serenade my mom, príncipe…

Thanos Twerks around Tacos and Tortas in the World’s Most Amazing Commercial

A restaurant in Boca del Río, Veracruz has found a winning combination to sell its products: Footage from Avengers: Infinity War, tacos, tortas and a super fun evil Thanos that twerks to show his penchant for Mexican food.

A commercial posted on the Facebook account of Takesabroso, shows Thanos delivering his now-famed deadly snap as he dissolves half of life on Earth. But instead of retreating to a quiet life until the Avengers come back seeking revenge, he is inspired to twerk around delicous tacos and tortas.

Watch the original tweet where this appears before Marvel’s lawyers get on this…

Via: TaKeSabroso

Why Look like a Reguar Dude when you Can Look Like El Chapo Guzmán?

Image via: The Guardian

Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán might be doomed to live in a prison cell forever, but that doesn’t mean we’ll be seeing lots of him everywhere. Or at least in the world of fashion.

Yes, my friends, el Chapo’s 29-year-old, Instagram-savvy wife Emma Coronel has officially launched El Chapo Guzman: JGL LLC, a brand new firm charged with designing clothes, shoes and accessories under the name –what else–  El Chapo Guzmán: JGL.

“This project is an idea Joaquin and I have had for a long time,” Coronel told the New York Daily News. “Before he was in the USA we talked a lot about this topic. Really, it’s both of our ideas.”

Well, isn’t that narco-romantic?

Via: CNET en Español

Mexico President Asks Spain to Apologize for the Conquest; Hilarity Ensues

SPOILER ALERT: The information contained in this post does not hail from The Onion. This actually happened. In real life. In Mexico.

So… Mexican president Andrés Manuel López Obrador (aka AMLO) wrote a letter to Spanish King Felipe VI and Pope Francis urging them to apologize for the “abuses” of colonialism and the conquest, which took place, like, a very long long time ago.

In a video filmed at the ruins of the indigenous city of Comalcalco, in southern Mexico, [AMLO] called on Spain and the Vatican to recognize the rights violations committed during the conquest of Mexico.

Sooner than you can say NO MAMES Mexican Twitter reacted and the reaction was –naturally– hilarious.

Spain responds

Mexico, once we get our apology

Yeah, it’s going to be great!

Ja Ja Ja Ja

More Ja Ja Ja

Retaliation

The only apology Mexico needs

Mexicans Stealing the Wall is Everyone’s Favorite Story of 2019

Hey, Mexicans are securing their walls with stolen razor wire –paid by Americans

I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried. Turns out Mexicans at the U.S. border are literally stealing the razor wire put there by Trump officials to beef up security and selling it to local residents for as little as $2 (“40 pesitos, marchanta!“)

According to The Guardian, residents of barrios abutting the border told XETW 12 television in Tijuana that entrepreneurial individuals have offered to sell them the stolen concertina wire and install it for just 40 pesos per home – barely $2.

The bad news is that people are already been arrested for stealing concertina wire along the border, BUT on the upside, this is already the favorite story of some high-profile media people, including –of course– yours truly. HA HA HA HA (or as we say in Mexicou: JA JA JA JA JA.)

Via: The Guardian

Trump-Themed Toilet Paper Knows no Borders –and Supports Migrants

What ever happened to Softness Without Borders?

The Mexico made Trump-themed toilet paper was first announced in 2017 with much fanfare, but we sort of lost track of it –until now that it began making the rounds on the Internet –again– as Mr. Trump insists a border wall will be built to keep “nasty Mexicans” and other bad hombres away.

Unlike the president of the United States, the Mexican-made Trump Paper offers “Softness without borders” and claims to “actually support migrants,” since its creator pledges to donate 30 percent of the proceeds to organizations helping migrants entering the United States.

The package also boasts it contains “puros rollos” — a double-entendre that means “pure rolls” but can also be understood as “pure nonsense,” which is, well, much more accurate to our current situation.

Oh, and one more thing: What’s with Zapata and the Burrito Revolution?…