Hold on to your Sombreros: Cinco de Mayo 2022 Is Here!

There seems to be a ton of Cinco de Mayo festivities in the Tampa area –for some reason.

No matter how many bizarre holidays Americans come up with, Cinco de Mayo will forever be my favorite. And not only because it’s an excuse to drink all day and yell ¡Viva México! while thinking it’s Mexican Independence (it’s not) but because it is also the time of year that brings out the stupidest most creative marketing brains to sell Americans everything, from DIY printable fiesta kits and taquito shooters (whatever that is,) to senseless drink mixes, “ethnic food” and even life-size cardboard Mexicans as scene setters.

Etsy T-shirts, anyone?

Nacho de Mayo, because why not?

This time around, though, in honor of that amazing marketing tool known as Twitter, I’ve put together a few tweets making their way to my timeline using the #CincoDeMayo hashtag. This has only begun, so, please help me by tweeting me your own personal horrors for 2021 Cinco de Mayo and let the “Mexican” madness begin!

Ah yes, the special churro doughnut

The southern lady who cooks

These people

The spicy financial goals

Taco Bell, man!

Note: This post will be updated on a regular basis.

 

Mexicans Vote on whether President Stays or Goes; Looks Like Zapata Is Winning

Mexican president holds his ballot for Sunday’s referendum on which he scribbled “¡Viva Zapata!” effectively -and intentionally- nullifying his own vote.

Mexicans this Sunday are going to the polls on whether their president Andrés Manuel López Obrador (aka AMLO) should end his six-year term or continue to the end.

The referendum, unusual for the country, will only binding if at least 40% of the country’s electorate votes, and AMLO is hoping on his popularity to achieve that figure.

He is so confident he’ll get the votes that he intentionally nullified his own ballot by scribbling “¡VIVA ZAPATA!” on it.

And -fortunately for this blogger- the memes have started to pour in…

This blog post will be updated throughout Sunday, because qué risa!

Ohio Politician Asks “Are you a Racist? Do you Like Mexicans?” Hilarity Ensues

Ohio Senate Candidate J.D. Vance on Tuesday released an advertisement asking Ohio voters if they “hate Mexicans.”

Soon after making its debut across social media, the 30-second spot had amassed more than 300,000 views on Twitter. And this blogger is pretty sure it had to do with Mexicans like herself jumpin in to troll him like only Mexicans can.

Below, some of my fave reactions (starting with yours truly, of course!)

Chente!

Torchy Tacos

At the ballgame

Speak American

Dreadful

Mic drop

Blogger’s note: This post will be updated throughout the day, because ¡qué risa!

The Will Smith-Jada Pinkett Piñata Combo Is here, Because Mexico

I’m not gonna get into the ‘cuernos’ and Bud Light thing ’cause I’m busy but you get the picture

It is official: Sunday night’s infamous Oscar slap has now been immortalized in the form of a piñata thanks to the folks of famed Piñatería Ramírez in northern Mexico.

The Will Smith & Jada Pinkett Smith piñatas come as a bundle with some questionable looks on either character, but omg look at those tears!

In case you’re wondering, being immortalized in the shape of a piñata is as prestigious as having been inducted into the Mexican historical hall of fame.

Photo via: Piñatería Ramírez on Facebook

South African ‘Mexican’ Chips Unleash the Fury of Mexicans on Reddit

Reddit Mexico has been abuzz with an overwhelming outcry against a South African corn chip snack.

The reason? Apparently, some Mexicans feel it’s super offensive to depict “one of our own” with a caricature of a mustachioed dude, wearing a giant sombrero and flanked by a cactus.

I get it, with the exception of yours truly, not all Mexicans like to wear giant sombreros when attending “culturally-relevant” parties. Yet, I’m much more offended by the look of these sad chips -and their apparent lack of delicious spicy flavor (or should I say “flavour?”)

Via: Reddit Mexico

Simon Leviev, the Tinder Swindler, Is Now a Piñata… Because Mexico!

Simon Leviev (aka your worst Tinder nightmare) makes it to Piñatería Ramírez

It is official: Simon Leviev (aka Yehuda Hayut and the Tinder Swindler, has been immortalized in the form of a piñata thanks to the folks of famed Piñatería Ramírez in northern Mexico.

The Tinder Swindler piñata comes with –what else?– a bunch of credit cards on his left hand, and a romantic bouquet of roses on his right. Oh, and look at those shoes!

In case you’re wondering, being immortalized in the shape of a piñata is as prestigious as having been inducted into the Mexican historical hall of fame.

Photo via: Piñatería Ramírez on Facebook

Got a Doggie who Loves Tacos? Worry Not! Canine Carry Outs Has your Back

Dog treats that taste like “beef-tacos?” Yes! Welcome to America

Is your four-legged best friend mad about tacos?

Worry not! Canine Carry Outs has exactly what you’re looking for. I give you Taco Minis, “a soft and chewy dog snack with the look and taste of miniature beef tacos.”

Now, I shouldn’t get into the whole specifics about what a “taco” actually entails, but the creators of this taco-treat-canine-wonder assure me these dog treats are “the perfect size and texture for treating as part of a balanced diet.”

So what are you waiting for? Get your perro some of these and wait for it to start barking in Mexican!

Hat tip: Lone Star Vegan

Telemundo Announces Tplus, English-language Content for ‘the 200%ers’ 🙄

I’m too old to remember Fusion, the short-lived, multimillion joint effort between Univision and ABC to craft English-language content for U.S. Latinos (now mostly known as “Latinx.”) We all know that didn’t go anywhere, but now Telemundo is giving it another shot with the launch of Tplus, a “new content brand” to serve the full spectrum of U.S. Hispanics as part of its effort to grow Peacock subscribers.

According to media reports, the new brand will initially be available on the Peacock Premium tier, with content programmed for what the company refers to as “the 200%ers”: audiences who are 100% American and 100% Latinx. 

In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, Romina Rosado (who somehow was identified as “Rosada,” throughout the article) said Tplus “is meant to resonate with U.S.-based Hispanic viewers who tend to skew younger and are, therefore, digitally native.”

I don’t know, man, seems like Big Media keeps throwing stuff to see what sticks and I’m just getting too old and tired to follow up -or even care.

This Blog’s Christmas Cards are Ready! You’re Welcome

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Before you go all crazy on me, let me clarify one thing: I did not invent the above awesomeness –of course. I have been busy taking siestas, eating tacos (throwing tacos at people) and sipping tequila (I’m Mexican, remember?) to be working on such an elaborate work of art.

Thank God I have the entire World Wide Web working for me to serve you people better. I might not be blogging much to be hones, but if you really miss me, you know what to do: JUST Go here and have fun!

So, without further ado: ¡Feliz Navidad! ahead of time; to get this out of the güey, because right now it’s time for this.

Zzzzzzzzzzz

sleeping

Spanish 101 for English-Speaking People

Americans: How can anyone not like them?

Challenged by some very unorthodox methods to teach English to Latinos (such as this one and this other one) Mexicans have come up with yet the most creative way to teach Spanish to English speaking people (i.e. mostly gringos.)

All you have to do is read the following sentences as if you were reading English.

Check it out. It’s easy, it’s revolutionary and… It’s FREE!

1. Boy As-N-R (Voy a cenar): I’m going to have dinner

2. N-L-C John (En el sillón): On the armchair

3. Be a Hope and Son (Viejo panzón): Fat old man

4. As Say Toon As (Aceitunas): Olives

5. The Head The Star Mall Less Stan Doe (Deje de estar molestando): Stop bugging me

6. Kit At Tell Loss War at Chess (Quítate los huaraches): Take off your sandals

7. Pass a Lass All Saw (Pasa la salsa): Pass the sauce

8. Be Goat Tess The Ran Chair-O (Bigotes de ranchero): Farmer’s mustache

9. Web Us Come Ham On (Huevos con jamón)

10. Does Stack Kit Toes The Car Neat As (Dos taquitos de carnitas): Two pork little tacos

New York City Mayor Inaugurates the ‘México-Tenochtitlan’ Avenue, Sadly not Called Manhatitlán

¡Viva México, Hijos de su Manhatitlán!

Say what you will about Bill de Blasio and Marcelo Ebrard, but thanks to this useless duo, this Mexican blogger can now proudly say she lives in a city that honors “México-Tenochtitlan” right at the intersection of 116th Street and Second Avenue.

Yes, having solved their respective city’s most urgent taskes, Mr. Ebrard and Mr. De Blasio formally inaugurated the “México-Tenochtitlan Avenue” in Manhattan, just around the corner of this blogger’s favorite tacos ever.

I don’t mean to cause any international incidents here, but WHY ON EARTH didn’t they just call this avenue Manhatitlán? It would mean so much for this humble blogger.

Damn you, Bill and Marcelo!

Via: Expansión