Dating a Latina Will Make you Fat [and Other Insights from Univision’s Millennial Channel]


Looks like Univision decided NOT to listen to me, so it went ahead to launch Flama, an English-language video channel, which according to ADWEEK, has “an eye on Hispanics between ages 15 and 30,” (aka Hispanic millennials.)

The channel, which is being sponsored by condom maker Trojan and Big Mac maker McDonald’s, features videos on comedy, music, lifestyle and sports.

The following video -inexplicably tagged as comedy- is a 4-minute-plus rant about what non-Latinos should expect from dating a Latina. And no, you don’t have to spend 4:09 minutes of your life watching it.

I watched it entirely, so you don’t have to and here’s the gist of it:

  • Latinas are crazy
  • Dating a Latina will make you fat (even if they cook with Mazola)
  • We love to cook tamales and pozole and quesadillas
  • If you are going to be in a relationship with a Latina, you should consider joining  Weight Watchers
  • We [Latinas] are clingy
  • We are like your probation officer but with sex -and frijoles

Or, you can watch… But don’t say I didn’t warn you.






Doritos Dinamita: Your Key to the Elusive Hispanic Millennial


Are you trying to reach the elusive Hispanic millennial but not sure how to go about it? I don’t blame you… After all, Hispanic millennials, while similar to regular, non-Hispanic millennials are a “dynamic group of individuals with diverse backgrounds and distinct traits.” Duh.

This and other shocking revelations can be found in this “insightful” (LOL) PR Week piece, which has laid out some awesome marketing tips for brands trying to reach Hispanic millennials. My favorite:

An example of a brand creating a product “para mi” is Doritos’ launch of Dinamita Nacho Picoso, rolled tortilla chips that are similar to taquitos (also known as flautas), a common Latin American dish. This not only illustrates Doritos understands the culture and flavor preferences of this community, but underscores the influence Hispanic Millennials and the Latin palette have on driving mainstream trends and new products.

Other insights inform us that Hispanic millennials “listen to Calle 13 and Jay-Z and eat arroz con pollo and mac and cheese interchangeably,” which is, like great and all, although I’m not sure where the Dorito-Nacho-Picoso-Latin-eating fits in here. You tell me.

Univision Might Want to Reconsider the Name of ‘Flama,’ its New Millennial Destination


As I reported a few days ago on Portada Online, Univision soon will debut Flama, a “digital destination that promises culturally relevant content targeting Hispanic millennials.”

So far so good. As most Spanish-speakers know, “flama” is Spanish for “flame,” which I think is a great name for a Hispanic media outlet. However, a simple Wikipedia search, informs us that FLAMA is also the acronym of:

The Frente de Libertação do Arquipélago da Madeira (English: Madeira Archipelago Liberation Front), a right-wing terrorist paramilitary organisation from Madeira, whose main goal was to achieve Madeira’s independence from mainland Portugal.

Wait. What?!

I’m sure Univision’s Flama has absolutely nothing to do with a paramilitary organization in Madeira, but just in case, it might be safer to be really “millennial” about it and just call it “Flame?”

Just sayin’