Category: Cinco de Mayo

It’s Cinco de Mayo! Time to Mix Drinks That Make no Sense

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LimeARita

I hate Cinco de Mayo in the U.S., not so much because it’s a reminder of how clueless people are about Mexican history, but because it is also the time to market some of the stupidest, senseless food & drink concoctions of all times.

Well, actually I think Bud Light’s Lime-A-Rita and Straw-Ber-Rita are kind of OK. The name is cute and hopefully the mix will give a little taste to such a tasteless beer. But Corona’s “CoronaRita” wins the prize of the silliest, most senseless concoction (and moniker) ever.

coronaRita2

Really, Corona? CoronaRita?

Just in Time for Cinco de Mayo: Taco Bell Eatery Will Serve Mexican Car Bombs

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ImageSpeaking of Mexican things that make no sense, this blog’s Gringo West Coast Correspondent just informed me that Taco Bell is testing a restaurant concept that -among other things- will be serving Mexican Car Bombs.

See? I had to learn about this by a non-Mexican person, because last time I checked, my people had no idea that a Mexican Car Bomb is simply a vanilla shake with Guinness, tequila caramel sauce and chocolate flakes.

The concoction is sure to please those already clueless enough to believe Cinco de Mayo is Mexico’s celebration of Independence and just one more excuse to stuff themselves with made-believe Mexican fare.

So, go ahead. Visit U.S. Taco Co., get bombed and puleeeze  stay away from real Mexicans.

Click below for a quick trip to some of the silliest Cinco de Mayo gimmicks.

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This Company Wants me to Celebrate ‘Cinco de Mayo’ by Tattooing My ‘Ta-Tas’

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tatas

Temporary breast tattoo company TaTaToos is so excited about Cinco de Mayo, it has come up with a culturally-relevant line of tattoos that promise to make your holiday -what else?- spicier.

I’m not sure what’s more depressing; if saying “tatas” instead of tetas, or having you celebrate the Battle of Puebla by imprinting some Spanish-language copy on your chest.

In any case, here’s part of the pitch from the original press release:

Make your Cinco de Mayo HOT this year with Ta*ta*toos – temporary tattoos that last up to 5 – 7 days. They are perfect to apply lower on the chest to ensure discreetness when wearing apparel and can be removed with household rubbing alcohol in less than 30 seconds!

I don’t think I’ll be celebrating a Mexican holiday by putting a tattoo on my “tatas…” Still, that part about rubbing alcohol on them sounds quite enticing.

Frito Lay Thinks Pico de Gallo Flavored Chips are a Good Idea

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lays-pico-de-gallo

I kind of like it when gringos go out of their way and tweak their menus and snacks to cater to “a more diverse America.”

Thanks to their relentless search for multicultural tasty perfection, we now have the Dunkin Donuts’ culturally-relevant Cuban sandwich, 7-Eleven’s Latin-inspired food and the millennial-targeted Doritos Dinamita to name only a few.

And now a new contender has arrived: Frito Lay’s Pico de Gallo flavored chips, which I’m sure will help the m lure the taste buds of my people (i.e. The Mexicans).

But if you are in the restaurant business, don’t think these papitas will help you lure more Hispanics to your establishment… This will, though. Enjoy the windfall.

Thank you @minsd for the tip.

McDonald’s German Mariachi Will Steal Your ‘Herz’ and Make you ‘Lieben’ Chili con Carne

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germanchili

Turns out the Germans are not only fond of Mexican food, but they get all festive and dress up in mariachi costumes and all to celebrate a good ‘chili con carne,’ which is actually not a Mexican dish, but who cares? Any excuse is good to dance around the Straßen waving Mexican flag and all.

Hat tip: @tropicarlitos

…and in case you don’t know what Los Wochos are; Los Wochos are El Chile con Carne, Los Beefos y el Chicken Fiesta.

Wochos

 

 

 

Wyandotte to Celebrate Cinco de Mayo on Cuatro de Mayo

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Wyandotte

How many Mexicans does it take to organize a Cinco de Mayo party in Wyandotte, Michigan? Apparently, zero. [I’m sure my people would have seriously objected to holding a May 5th celebration on May 4th.]

Too bad organizers didn’t consult with this blogger beforehand. I could have given them an awesome tagline for their event:

“Guayandóte: Esperándote desde el Cuatro para celebrar el Cinco”

¡Ajúa!

Gringos, Latinos, They All Failed Remezcla’s ‘Mexi-Quizz’

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So Remezcla took to the streets of New York to quiz Latinos –and non-Latinos– on Mexican culture.

This is what they had to say.

This blogger was not the least surprised nor shocked at the sheer ignorance of the interviewees in the above video. Some previous research before had threw some light on perceptions of Americans on yet another Mexican holiday: Cinco de Mayoouuu!

How to Make ‘Albondígas’ con Chopote [i.e. Chipotle]

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I do not know where I had been hiding, but I cannot believe I didn’t know anything about the Hispanic Food Network. Until now.

Watch Mike Gonzalez here tell you how “albondígas con chopote” [sic] are very close to our Mexican hearts and other culturally-relevant wonders.

The Mexican music in the background is PRICELESS. I hope you people would appreciate it as much as I did.

Yummy!

Chandler, Arizona Celebrates Cinco de Mayo With Chihuahua Race. Whoof! Catch Them if you Can

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Enough with the bad news hailing from Nazi Arizona. Residents of Chandler, AZ. are ready for their Cinco de Mayo celebration, which this year will include a Chihuahua race scheduled to take place in the courtyard of the downtown Chandler Public Library. According to the contest’s organizers:

“To participate, dogs must be purebred Chihuahuas, have current vaccinations and must be on leash when not racing.”

No word yet on how the local police plans to check the pets’ legal status, but since Chandler belongs to Maricopa County, I’m sure they’ll find a way.

Whoof! Whoof! catch them if you can!