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I’m not sure you guys know this, but Cuatro de Julio is a not-so-booming town in the north of Paraguay. Population: 63 people for 7 km radius. And, as far as I can tell, nobody there celebrates, nor gives a damn about the Fourth of July.
Other fun facts: Latitude: -20.1333; Lat (DMS): 20° 7′ 60S; Altitude (meters): 76;
Here’s a map in case you don’t know where to locate Cuatro de Julio… (or Paraguay, for that matter)
So, North and South of the Equator: Have a Happy Cuatro de Julio!
The Center for Immigration Studies, a so-called think tank I’ve never heard of, has published a very long report that basically concludes immigrants are illiterate and that Hispanics, in particular, “lag far behind other migrant populations in the U.S. when it comes to developing proficiency in English.”
The study, of course, was widely cited in several conservative publications, notably the Drudge Report (duh) and even gathered enough steam to call for an end of political correctness and launch a national Speak English Initiative.
“The importance of English literacy cannot be overstated,” wrote Jason Richwine, the author of the study and yet another person unknown to this blogger. “Without language proficiency, immigrant families will find it difficult to succeed in the mainstream of American society, and high rates of English illiteracy may be a sign of poor immigrant assimilation.”
In other words, as Mrs. Palin has warned us repeatedly: If you, people, want to be here… let’s speak American!
TAKE IT AWAY, SARAH!
Mexico City looked like a scene of an apocalyptic movie on Wednesday afternoon as a powerful storm hit Mexico’s capital, flooding entire avenues, several subway stations and even private homes and shopping malls.
But, as you — loyal followers of this blog — have learned by now, there’s no stopping the creativity of my people (i.e. The Mexicans) in the face of adversity.
Just WATCH:
Video by: @LoboSinLuna
As Mr. Bastion himself wrote in New York magazine:
I’ve seen people use it to rim a margarita glass, to shake on watermelon and oranges, or on scrambled eggs. Amazing on corn on the cob. It’s great on everything, particularly in the summer. Keep it in your carry-on and go crazy.
So far so good, Michael, and we’re willing to go crazy with you, but here’s a useful, free-of-charge piece of advice: Why pay $9 for a 14 oz. Tajín bottle in Amazon when you can buy, like, dozens of those in Mexico for that price? I mean, nobody wants to be taken for a ride, and I’m sure you’re not the exception…
You are welcome.
Hat tip: @minsd
The above sign was spotted at a posh resort, but I’m pretty sure they did not use Google to translate the text into Spanish. I literally just pasted the English text into my Google Translate app, and it came up with a pretty decent Por favor, apague las duchas cuando haya terminado.
[See below]
So here’s a piece of advice for English-speaking hotel owners out there: If you must choose between your high-school Spanish and Google Translate… Go with the latter.
¡GRACIAS!
Sick of bad news? I have some good news for you. No, actually I have some GREAT news for y’all.
Our Commander in Chief this week reiterated his promise to build a huge, beautiful wall along the Mexico-U.S. border. But unlike previous reports, it looks like this thing will not be your regular wall, ¡no señor!: It will be a solar wall, one that will create energy, and thus will pay for itself. That way, said the-man-who-shall-not-be-mentioned, “Mexico will have to pay much less money, and that’s good.”
But that is not good, it is SUPER good, because you know what “much less money” spent on the wall means, right? It means we’ll have extra cash for tacos, tamales, garnachas and the like. So, YAY!
Make Garnachas Affordable Again!
Just WATCH!
#MGAA
A 34-year-old Mexican-American dude who brands himself “The Undeportable One” is such a fan of you-know-who that he decided to change his surname to… Trump. The move, mind you, was approved by a judge.
According to The Daily Mail:
“Heavily tattooed Ernesto Baeza Acosta filed a petition to change his name to Ernesto Trump, and called on the President to invite him to the White House.”
Apparently this dude is also into making videos (see one below) and in a recent one you can see him proudly saying:
“You can call me the undeportable one, you can call me the President’s son or you can call me Ernesto Trump.”
Oh, and just in case you were wondering: All this happened in — where else? — TEXAS!
Anyhow, I’m like super busy but must keep laughing…..
Via: DailyMail, what else?
European champions Portugal made their entrance at the FIFA Confederations Cup Russia 2017 against Mexico on Sunday, a match that ended in an almost unbelievable 2-2 tie and many amazing Mexican memes — of course.
Here are some of this blogger’s favorites:
La imagen del partido! 🙌🏽 pic.twitter.com/J1NC864JMw
— Korno Espinosa (@korno) 18 de junio de 2017
Quédate con quien te mire como Andrés Guardado a Cristiano: pic.twitter.com/EIFWYbf57f
— Comandante Supremo (@jabonisimo) 18 de junio de 2017
The floor is @miseleccionmx: pic.twitter.com/9IWguPcH1D
— Comandante Supremo (@jabonisimo) 18 de junio de 2017
“Te amo, te odio, te amo, te odio, ay cómo odio amarte”
-Todo México, al Chicharito.
— Havuck El Robot (@YoHavuck) 18 de junio de 2017
¡TIEMBLA CRISTIANO! pic.twitter.com/TiQmxTFWdX
— Risco (@jrisco) 18 de junio de 2017
Cuando ya tienes asumido que estás medio pesado #PORMEX pic.twitter.com/OBSVrBlSry
— Leonardo Bugueño (@leonardobugueno) 18 de junio de 2017
#NoNieguesQue Los Simpsons predijeron el #PORMEX #portugalvsmexico pic.twitter.com/g0DfhNecb3
— Vin Flores (@Flores_HVA) 18 de junio de 2017
Comparte este ChichaDios de la suerte para que México gane el partido. pic.twitter.com/R27uhaTRg6
— TENIENTE CHOCHOS (@chochos) 18 de junio de 2017
Photo: Carolina González
People have got to stop doing this.
According to my sources (i.e. the World Wide Web) Mexican and U.S. brewers have gotten together to reinvent Donald Trump as a “gun-slinging mariachi” to promote Amigous, a beer supposed to “celebrate cross-border cooperation.” But the gun is only the beginning. From the little I could read, Trump’s trousers are held up with a swastika belt buckle, and the rear label of the beer informs the reader that the 71-year-old New Yorker belongs “in a mad house, not the White House.”
The “innovative” product comes on the heels of the Trump-inspired toilet paper and other crazy ideas out there.
I am not going to spend too much time on talking about this thing, because 1) I’m super busy and 2) It’s almost impossible to keep up with all the marketing nonsense around our current administration and the dark, sad hole we’ve all fallen into.
So… wake me up in 2024, will ya?
Via: Univision
It was not long ago that Jonathan Goldsmith, the Dos Equis’ original — and devastatingly handsome — Most Interesting Man in the World was replaced by an uninteresting French dude in an effort to appeal to millennials.
Well, I’m happy to report Mr. Goldsmith has a new gig, and it has to do with drinking something way more interesting than watery beer. Starting this month Goldsmith will be the new face of Astral Tequila, because — really — that’s what you’re supposed to drink when you’re a grown up, handsome, interesting person. (I’m just going to have to investigate about that particular brand of tequila, which honestly sounds a bit fishy.)
The full ads are not out yet, but a video teaser uploaded this week by Davos Brands shows us the very interesting Mr. Goldsmith, surrounded by beautiful women, of course, and telling us: “I told you, I don’t always drink beer.”
Hopefully, Mr. Goldsmith will remember not mention Dos Equis by name.
Hat tip: Gonzalo J. Suárez
Some people are really losing their sh*t over Super Mario Odyssey, Nintendo’s upcoming game for the Nintendo Switch set to release in October.
The reason? Among the challenges to be faced by our cute mustachioed friend is a new “Mexican level,” a town called — what else? — Tostarena, which is populated by “colorful skull-headed creatures in ponchos and sombreros.”
Not only I’m not offended by this idea; I’m so totally looking forward to playing this thing. I mean, everyone here looks very happy, has a guitar, wears a sombrero and — I can only hope — eats tostadas all day.
So, ¡ajúa!
El nivel mexicanito de Mario Odyssey se llama “Tostarena Town”. Because Tostadas… pic.twitter.com/GbIZuN1zB0
— Akira@ #NerdcoreLive (@akirareiko) 13 de junio de 2017
Awww, Mexico, the land of the surreal and pure awesomeness…
In the latest political faux pas, a local politician in the state of Tlaxcala thought it was a great idea to copy, almost verbatim, a speech by the super evil Frank Underwood, of House of Cards.
In a short video posted on his Facebook account, Miguel Ángel Covarrubias, repeats one of Underwood’s most famous speeches, calling for “opening doors and closing paradigms” to end up in a dramatic: “The past has brought us here, and here is only the beginning of a great story.” Which I believe refers to the fifth season of House of Cards.
Anyhow, while Covarrubias defended himself from the criticisms saying the copy was “intentional,” Netflix responded in style by using another evil character from House of Cards, Doug Stamper, to reprimand the Mexican politician … in his own language:
“Imitation is not always the best form of flattery”
La imitación no es siempre la mejor forma de adulación. #Tlaxcala pic.twitter.com/WeA6wilGW3
— House of Cards (@HouseofCards) 14 de junio de 2017
Via: CNET en Español
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