Mexican Singers, Russian Hackers, Same Difference, Says Texas Congressman Mike Conaway

giphymariachi

In the latest episode of the political joke we’re now living, Rep. Mike Conaway from Texas just told The Dallas Morning News (apparently with a straight face) that the Democrats using Mexican singers, charros, mariachis and soap operas to lure Hispanics to the Hillary Clinton campaign is pretty much the same thing as the Russian hacking scandal.

Per Conaway himself:

“Harry Reid and the Democrats brought in Mexican soap opera stars, singers and entertainers who had immense influence in those communities into Las Vegas, to entertain, get out the vote and so forth.”

And this, says Conaway, should be considered “foreign influence […] If we’re worried about foreign influence, let’s have the whole story.”

Really? Last I checked, many of those colorful people seen singing on stage or hosting taco-filled fiestas for Hillary were actually U.S.-born or U.S. citizens (Los Tigres del Norte, Julieta Venegas, Vicente Fernández, etc.) but anyway, they were not sneaking behind the Web to hack an election were they.

Come on! ¡Pinche Conagüey!

Via: Dallas Morning News

Hillary Clinton Does ‘El Gordo y la Flaca,’ Because You Gotta do What you Gotta Do

hillary

Hillary Clinton made Hispanic History (i.e. Hispandering) on Tuesday, Oct. 25, 2016 by showing up at Univision’s long-running El Gordo y la Flaca; declaring Mexican food is her favorite and even getting up to dance salsa with the crew.

Alas, she did not take her clothes off to join The Fat One in his famous jacuzzi. Now THAT would have been entertaining…

Now I’m dead.

DEVELOPING: This blog post will be updated as soon as this recovers from shock (which will likely occur until after Happy Hour)

Via: Univision.com

Pro-Trump SuperPAC Launches First Spanish Language TV Ad. I’ts Awful and Has Typos, of Course

¡Ay mis ojos!
¡Ay mis ojos!

In what appears to be Great America PAC’s first Spanish-language television ad backing Donald Trump, we can see Hillary Clinton shown barking like a dog while a narrator says something like “If you want the dog, accept the fleas,” except that the superimposed Spanish-language text on the screen actually says “accepta,” instead of acepta.

But none of it matters, because the whole thing is so horrible, it will make you cringe even if you don’t speak Spanish.

WATCH. CRINGE. DO NOT REPEAT

Via: Kantar Media.

Hillary Clinton to Host ‘Debate Fiesta’ on Wednesday Night, Because… ¡Ajúa!

giphymariachi

Speaking of Hillary Clinton and her tacos con todo, the pantsuit-loving democratic presidential candidate (PLDPC) is planning to throw a Mexican/Hispanic-themed party to watch the last presidential debate Wednesday night.

According to the Clinton campaign, the fiesta will take place Oct. 19 in Nevada, home of Tacos El Gordo, and will feature Vicente “Chente” Fernández as a guest of honor.

In case you have forgotten or — WORSE! — don’t follow this blog, “Chente” just came back from near retirement to ask YOU to vote for Hillary in mariachi fashion.

Now, go get yourself a Made-in-China mariachi hat and liters of tequila, and don’t forget to follow @miblogestublog on Twitter for a Mexican-themed Twitter party Wednesday night.

¡Ajúa!

 

In Ongoing Effort to Secure the Hispanic Vote, Hillary Makes Strategic Stop in Tacos El Gordo

elgordo

As  part of her ongoing effort to woo my people (i.e. taco-loving Hispanics) Democratic Presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton this week made a very important stop in Tacos El Gordo, a Las Vegas staple.

According to — who else? — Spanish-language media, Clinton ordered two tacos: one of carne adobada and one of asada. 

Two tacos might not sound like a lot, but according to my sources, la Clinton wanted them “con todo,” because you know how politician types can be like. They always want, like, everything.

tacos2
Via: Tacos El Gordo

Hillary Clinton Makes Good on Her Promise to Be our Abuela

hillary

Making good on her promise to be the savior of my people and assume the role of our abuelas, Grandma Clinton has released Brave, a new 60-second spot in which we see her reassuring a young girl who says her parents are going to be deported.

“My parents have a letter of deportation,” the girl says. “I’m scared they are going to be deported.” Clinton then calls the girl on stage and tells her that she’s going to do everything she can to help her.

WATCH and do not try to hold back tears, because I guess that’s what we’re supposed to do upon seeing this thing.

Hillary or Evita? NPR Asks, Latinos Respond, Hilarity Ensues

Evita? Hillary?
Evita? Hillary?

NPR has finally discovered Hillary Clinton’s new Spanish-language posters, which — as everybody knows —  make her look a little too much like Eva Perón, the actress turned first lady of Argentina.

You can read the story here, but the best part about this so far is the reaction of some Latinos on Twitter. Here are just some of my favorites:

On peronism….

On being The Force

Ojo yanquis…

To the Donald…

Pure hilarity…

 

H is for ‘Hispanics:’ Hillary Really Wants your [Hispanic] Vote

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Hillary Clinton, aka the wife of the non-inhaler former President of the United States, on Sunday formally announced her second run for the White House. But she did it in the most millennial fashion: through a digital blitz in English — and Spanish — portraying herself as a champion of everyday Americans.

“La Clinton” even posted her now archfamous tweet in a so-so Spanish, in which she claims she wants to be el defensor [SIC] and not “la defensora” of the American people.

I’m not sure if I need Hillary as my defensor or defensora for anything, but I’m pretty damn sure she’s way a better alternative than this guy and certainly this other one.

Awww, if only I could vote…

Via: CNET en Español

Want to Denounce a Crime in Mexico? Call Your Local Bank

hot-lineYou gotta love Mexico’s politicians.

As part of its ongoing fight against organized crime –and presumably in an effort to impress Hillary Clinton, who is paying a visit— the Mexican government this week set up a hot line for people to call in anonymously to denounce criminal activity. Alas, the number published nationwide on the Official Journal of the Federation turned out to be the switchboard of a local Scotiabank branch.

The Office of the Attorney General is sending countless corrections and even some apologies. Well, I mean, nobody’s perfect!