Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez Tours a Bodega, Eats Burritos and Drinks Jarritos de Piñac

AOC joins Desus & Mero on Bronx tour.

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has a way to respond to haters.

As part of the premiere episode of Showtime’s Desus & Mero, the New York City native decided to show her critics that she’s not only a kick-ass politician but knows her way around a bodega and a taquería. Oh, and she will also mix you a margarita. And just so we have it clear: These people in Washington D.C. are “not smarter than a bartender.”

Watch Ocasio-Cortez as she joins her fellow Bronx natives, show hosts Desus Nice and The Kid Mero, on a tour of their home borough that includes bodegas, happy faces, burritos, margaritas, Bohemia beer and even Jarritos de piña.

 

‘Fresh Mexican Waters Any Flavor?’… Yeah, Mexicans Will Understand…

After all these years in “America” I still haven’t found an accurate way to translate “aguas mexicanas” into English. Some would say “juice” (no, they’re not really juices) while others insist on “ice-tea”. Nope. Tampoco.

Google Translate, of course, doesn’t help either, so I think my paisanos in this Harlem deli are right: Aguas frescas mexicanas has got to be “Fresh Mexican Waters.”

Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem 2019

New York City’s New School Chancellor Is a Professional Mariachi. No, Really.

If everything else fails, Richard Carranza can always go back to serenading las muchachas. ¡Ajúa!

From the Archives of I Could Not Make This Thing Up if I Tried comes Richard Carranza, the recently appointed New York City Schools Chancellor, who took a very unsual approach when discussing his new job with Mr. De Blasio and wife: He serenaded them with mariachi song María Elena.

His background is plain awesome. Per the [failing] New York Times:

At Monday’s news conference, Mr. Carranza said he had been a mariachi musician since he was about 6 years old. When he wanted to stay up late with his father and his uncles, they said the only people staying up late were people playing instruments — so he learned to play the guitar. He later worked his way through college at the University of Arizona “gigging,” as he put it on Monday.

Now you know. If running our disastrous public school system turns out to be too much for this fellow Mexican, he can always go back to serenading las muchachas. ¡Ajúa!

Just WATCH:

Via: New York Times

This Woman Protesting the End of DACA Is My Spirit Animal

Chancla Power on Display

Americans from all walks of life took to the streets Tuesday, Sept. 5, 2017 to protest Donald Trump’s cruelest decision to date: To kill DACA, a program implemented by the Obama administration that granted undocumented children protection from deportation as well as permits to be able to work legally in the US.

The decision sparked nationwide protests, including one outside the Trump Tower in the heart of New York City where dozens of protesters were arrested. Among the brave — and most hilarious — protesters was the woman above, who had a clear message for Donald Trump (or rather his Twitter handle.)

Photo via: @NYSYLC

Who Needs Banks When you Can Have Tacos Instead?

El Rancho, formerly NY Capital Bank, East Tremont and Park.

If there was any doubt that Mexicans have taken over the USA, take a walk on the wild side… of The Bronx; more especifically, around Webster Avenue, one of the borough’s longest throughfares, and you’ll come across El Rancho, formerly NY Capital Bank, and now home of some of the most delish Mexican food in the area.

Because, really, who needs walls — and/or banks — when you can have tacos?

Photo: Laura Martínez, Bronx, NYC

Michael Jordan’s Steak House Now Serving $12 Tacos

tacos12dollars

New York City’s Michael Jordan’s The Steak House has jumped into the UTW (Unaffordable-Tacos-Wagon) with the introduction of a $12 New York strip taco, generously featuring  guacamole *and* pico de gallo.

Please note that for that price you will only be able to order at the bar.. Were you to sit down at an actual table, this thing will probably cost you like 50 bucks or something.

This blogger has not tried, nor will try these things until she succeeds in accomplishing a long-time quest: to Make U.S. Tacos Affordable Again!

Photo: Brooklyn Taco Correspondent

Mexikosher Opens in New York City, Because Why Not?

MexiKosher

You guys! Mexikosher (aka The Real Mexican Kosher) has opened its doors in Manhattan’s Upper West Side, bringing local residents some strange “Mexican” delicacies, including hot wings, nachos and rice bowls.

According to the well-informed New York Times, MexiKosher is the creation of Mexican-born chef and co-owner Katsuji Tanabe, who follows kosher rules “without compromising on flavor.” This means, apparently, that he can concoct Kosher-challenged meals like birria, carnitas and beef brisket braised in duck fat. Heck, there’s even a “bacon cheeseburger” made with cured beef belly “bacon” and soy cheese.

I don’t know about you, but there are a lot of quotation marks on those “meals,” so I think I’ll pass. For now.

Photo: Laura Martínez, 2016

Harlem Shoe Store Proudly Peddling Pablo Escobar Gear, Because ‘Narcos’

Stay classy, New York
Stay classy, New York

This shoe and clothing store has been around for ages in the corner of Broadway and 150th street, but only yesterday I noticed a new addition to their offer: a bright red baseball cap featuring none other than Pablo Escobar.

I have no idea if that thing is for sale or it’s just sitting there as a sort of good-luck charm. Either way, I think it’s awesome and Netflix should be super proud.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem 2016

Puerto Rico’s Super Woman Studies in Columbia, Not Colombia

borinquena
La Borinqueña will be the guest of honor at this year’s Puerto Rican Day Parade.

I might have been sleeping but totally missed this week’s presentation of La Borinqueña, the first afroboricua Super Woman.

According to its creator, Puerto Rican illustrator Edgardo Miranda-Rodriguez, La Borinqueña’s real name is Marisol Ríos de la Luz; she is a young Puerto Rican studying a masters in Columbia (Not Colombia) and living in Brooklyn with her parents. (She also has a body well suited for Hispanic television, if you asked me.)

La Borinqueña will also be this year’s guest of honor at this year’s Puerto Rican Day Parade to take place June 12 in New York City.

Via: Univision

Mayor De Blasio Appoints Dora the Explorer Ambassador to NYC… Because Nueva York

¡Bienvenidos a Nueva York!
NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio has appointed a cartoon character as the city’s official ’embajadora

Remember when Dora the Explorer was on her way to become Dora the Stripper?

Well, worry no more. The adorable bilingual heroine Dora the Explorer has been appointed New York City’s “family ambassador,” as part of a new tourism campaign in both English and Spanish. (I guess she’ll be keeping her innocent looks for a while longer. No cleavage and miniskirts, OK, Dora?)

Per an agreement between NYC & Company and Nickelodeon, families will be encouraged by Dora the Explorer to travel around the city’s family-friendly attractions. And this is how Mayor Bill de Blasio announced the whole thing:

“From the Staten Island Ferry and Times Square to the amazing diversity of Queens, the views from the Brooklyn Bridge Park and the wonderful Bronx Zoo, it’s no surprise New York City has become a favorite family destination […] I’m very excited to have Dora as our official embajadora to show families from across the globe the countless recreational and cultural riches of the five boroughs.”

I hope Dora’s Spanish will be a little better than that of the New York City Taxi and Limousine Commission.