The Irish Are Making Tacos, my Friends

Corned-beef and cabbage? That doesn’t sound very “Irish” to me.

It’s almost St. Patrick’s Day and if you have been paying attention, this means Irish-Americans are getting ready to celebrate with… Irish tacos!

Yes, my friends, brave Irish men in America have been making tacos for some time now, some of them with terrific success. However, for the most part, these are basically a concoction of leftover corned beef and boiled cabbage, “decorated” with Jack cheese, horseradish sauce — “or maybe a creamy sauce made with some Guinness stout.”

I don’t know about you, but I’ll be sticking to drinking Irish (and/or non-Irish) stuff on Sunday, so thanks but no thanks.

Via: Journal Now

 

Taco Bell Launches the Naked Egg Taco, Because there’s not Enough Misery in America

SAD!

And just when I thought life couldn’t be more miserable, Taco Bell today announced the national rollout of the “Naked Egg Taco,” a “thing” that for a while was only available to the poor souls of Flint, Michigan.

“The Naked Egg Taco strips down the traditional breakfast taco, allowing us to deliver a new flavor experience in every single bite,” said Liz Matthews, Chief Food Innovation Officer at Taco Bell Corp, apparently with a straight face. 

In case you were wondering, this “thing” is filled with fried potatoes, cheese, sausage or bacon and will roll out nationwide on August 31 at a bargain price of $1.99.

OK. Send in the nukes, people, I’m ready…

Amazon Will Have you Assemble your Own Tacos al Pastor, Because it’s 2017 and the End is Near

Are you dying for a trio of juicy tacos al pastor but happen to live in the middle of Iowa? Worry not! Amazon has you covered!

Starting very soon, Amazon will begin delivery of “Meal Kits,” a service similar to Blue Apron, which will provide you with all the pieces necessary to ensamble your own meal! Take the Tacos al Pastor kit, which includes jalapeños, salsa verde, chipotle marinade, pork loin, pineapple, cilantro, radishes, pico de gallo and — alas — flour tortillas, because this is America, people, and that’s that. So, suck it.

Check out below all the goodies you’ll get and the instructions to ensamble your own Tacos al Pastor.

Now, allow me to go hang myself…

Sombrero tip: Oscar Gutiérrez

Via: CNET en Español

Parisian Eatery Features “Original French Tacos,” Because it’s 2017 and Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

Remember Paris real authentic Mexican restaurant or the super popular Le Guacamole version Grandé?

Well, Parisians have outdone themselves and are going all in with the whole We-Too-Can-Make-Original-Tacos.

Introducing O’Tacos, “Original French Tacos” that you get to make yourself, or so I can surmise from their logo featuring something that looks like La Pyramide de Louvre — or a tortilla chip, I’m really not sure.

Anyhow, as any pompous French would tell you: C’est quoi ce truc?

Photo: Europe Taco Correspondent, @KentGerman

 

Who Needs Banks When you Can Have Tacos Instead?

El Rancho, formerly NY Capital Bank, East Tremont and Park.

If there was any doubt that Mexicans have taken over the USA, take a walk on the wild side… of The Bronx; more especifically, around Webster Avenue, one of the borough’s longest throughfares, and you’ll come across El Rancho, formerly NY Capital Bank, and now home of some of the most delish Mexican food in the area.

Because, really, who needs walls — and/or banks — when you can have tacos?

Photo: Laura Martínez, Bronx, NYC

The TriceraTACO Will Keep your Sad-Looking ‘Taco’ in Place

Hard-shell tacos, not dinosaurs, should be extinct.

Move over, plastic taco-truck. Here comes the TriceraTACO, a machine-washable, plastic dinosaur that will hold your hard-shell disgusting tacos for only $13! Please note that given its shape and size, this thing will only hold those things Americans insist on calling a “taco” and will never be suited for a decent al pastor…

The TriceraTACO is now on sale on — where else? — Amazon.com, home of the Deluxe Mexican Yoga Mat and  the Mexico Will Pay for the Wall jumpsuit.

¡Que viva el nonsense y el marketing!

Hat tip: Verónica Calderón

Sushi Tacos Are the Latest Food Craze, Because some People Want to Watch the World Burn

What the hell is this?

Not content with ruining everything with the taco-topped pizza, the Quesalupa and the Biscuit Taco, Americans are at it again.

Meet the SUSHI-TACO, the latest food craze that will soon take over your Instagram account.

According to my very reliable sources (i.e. the Internet,) sushi tacos first started popping up on Instagram thanks to Tail and Fin, a restaurant in — where else? — Las Vegas, which is serving up “white rice topped with fish and vegetables and nestled inside a circular seaweed shell.”

But. Wait. A. Second.

Guess what, you dimwits? A “white rice topped with fish and vegetables and nestled inside a circular seaweed shell” is not a taco, it’s just sushi, so stop it already!

Via: Metro.com.uk

 

Bride Makes Wedding Gown out of Taco Bell Burrito Wrappers, Because some People Want me Dead

These "Burritos" are in Love
Burritos in Love

Some people want to watch the world burn — and/or see this blogger jump from the highest building in Manhatitlán.

Here’s the scoop: Bride-to-be Diane Nguyen posted the above photo on her Instagram feed showing a wedding gown made out of … Taco Bell burrito wrappers (hopefully unused.)

And no, apparently she isn’t that crazy; she’s just vying to win a Taco Bell contest where fans of the eatery submit photos or brief videos showing why they should win a free wedding at the Taco Bell Cantina in Las Vegas. (Oh, OK I take that back. She is crazy.)

You guys know how I feel about Taco Bell, but I confess this bride’s writing was actually not as bad as her taste in food:

“Our love for each other is as cheesy as a quesadilla,” she wrote. “We’re nachos getting married, it’s going to be a Las Vegas tacover. Lettuce celebrate our love at the Taco Bell Chapel in Vegas, cuz we are ready to guac and roll.”

Via: CNET en Español