I was just coming back from work and now this thing will hunt me forever…
Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem
Category: New York City
Bodegas are a National Treasure; Just Don’t Ask the Owner for the Bathroom Key
It is no secret that bodegas are a wonder of sorts. No matter the time of day you will surely find all your basics. Late night-condoms? a Guadalupe Virgin candle? Emergency tampons? Terrible coffee? …. The bodeguero has your back.
Oh, but try not asking him to use the bathroom, unless you want to unleash a series of… hilarious musical events.
WATCH Saturday Nights’ Live (March 2, 2019 episode)
Some New York City Lawyers are Genuinely Bilingual…
… unlike racist New York lawyer Aaron Schlossberg, who once claimed to be “fluent in Spanish” but then went batshit crazy and threatened to call ICE on people speaking the language at his local deli.
Shame on you, Señor Schlossberg. You should learn from the fine lawyers of Spanish Harlem, who I’m sure are much more attuned to the sensibilities of a multicultural, multiethnic city –and the need for [true] bilingual professionals.
Photo: Laura Martínez, NYC 2018
Latinos Threw a Party for Racist Lawyer Aaron Schlossberg in Manhattan. It Was Amazing! 💃🏻
Being Hispanic in the U.S. has become a sort of act of resistance for many of us. Not only because we have to deal with a president who launched his candidacy by calling Mexicans a bunch of rapists and criminals, but because that same presidency seems to be enabling all kinds of racist behavior towards “these people” (i.e. Latinos, Hispanics, Beaners or whatever you want to call “my people.”)
In one of the most recent of these episodes, a video went viral this week showing New York attorney Aaron Schlossberg verbally attacking deli employees for –wait for it– speaking Spanish. In Manhattan. At a deli. Imagine that!
In the video (which was first reported by Latino Rebels), we can see Schlossberg complaining aggressively to the deli’s management, saying “your staff is speaking Spanish to clients when they should be speaking English. Every person I listen to: he spoke it, he spoke it, she’s speaking it,” he says, pointing angrily at several people in the place.
The incident spread quickly across social media and made it eventually to the main media outlets, causing hilarious scenes where reporters were trying to interview Schlossberg just to see him running away as if someone had called La Migra on him.
Needless to say, Schlossberg’s tirade got Latinos very angry (and many reasonable non-Latinos, of course) but I’m happy to report that “my people” responded in the best way possible: By throwing him a Latin FIESTA right on his block, outside a posh apartment building on West 60th Street, in the heart of Manhattan.
The party, which took place on Friday, May 18, was organized by a group known as Millennials for Revolution on Facebook who invited people to show Schlossberg that speaking Spanish is not a crime and that “we will gladly educate you on our culture and language by throwing a big fiesta.”
And it was goooood!
It was only 5:30 pm but dozens of people were already gathered, listening to music, waving improvised signs and chanting things like Hablamos español! I don’t know exactly how, but I found myself joining the crowd dancing to some good ol’ Latin favorites: From Celia Cruz’ Quimbara, to Elvis Crespo’s Suavemente and –yes– several versions of Despacito. Ay!
The fiesta reached its peak when a mariachi band, organized through a GoFundMe page that has raised over $1,000, arrived on site and gave us some old time Mexican favorites, including a moving version of Cielito lindo, which had us all singing out loud.
I created the #AaronSchlossbergLatinParty hashtag on Twitter and was happy to see it was used by other users to help spread the love.
Click through this Twitter moment and ¡Que siga la fiesta!
⚡ We threw a Latin party for Aaron Schlossberg in Nueva York. It was awesome https://t.co/ocRglsnZV3 #AaronSchlossbergLatinParty pic.twitter.com/AHPTQbOxCG
— Laura Martínez ®️ (@miblogestublog) 19 de mayo de 2018
UPDATE: On Tuesday May 22, the racist lawyer used social media to apologize. The apology is lame and I don’t believe him, but here it is:
— AaronSchlossbergLaw (@ASchlossbergLaw) 22 de mayo de 2018
New York City’s New School Chancellor Is a Professional Mariachi. No, Really.
From the Archives of I Could Not Make This Thing Up if I Tried comes Richard Carranza, the recently appointed New York City Schools Chancellor, who took a very unsual approach when discussing his new job with Mr. De Blasio and wife: He serenaded them with mariachi song María Elena.
His background is plain awesome. Per the [failing] New York Times:
At Monday’s news conference, Mr. Carranza said he had been a mariachi musician since he was about 6 years old. When he wanted to stay up late with his father and his uncles, they said the only people staying up late were people playing instruments — so he learned to play the guitar. He later worked his way through college at the University of Arizona “gigging,” as he put it on Monday.
Now you know. If running our disastrous public school system turns out to be too much for this fellow Mexican, he can always go back to serenading las muchachas. ¡Ajúa!
Just WATCH:
Via: New York Times
Mexican Independence: Too Many Fiestas, Too Little Time
I don’t know about you, but I do take national holidays very seriously, especially when it comes to drinking and eating like there’s no tomorrow.
So, in celebration of my relatively recent double-citizenship bonanza and the upcoming anniversary of Mexico’s Independence, this blogger will be pulling all her U.S.-based resources to list the very best stuff you can buy/do on THIS SIDE of the border so you feel as if you were on the OTHER side of the border.
Now… I’ll be posting some actual goodies later this week (I’m exhausted, you know?), but for now, I’d like to kick off this year’s festivities with the colorful invite (above) I just received from the Mexican Consulate in New York, which makes it clear our Ángel de la Independencia is as tall as the Empire State Building *and* the Freedom Tower themselves.
So there you go, suckers, ¡Viva México, cabrones!
HELP! The Avocado-Hipster-Millennial Nonsense Has Reached my Neighborhood –and I’m Dying!
This is not Brooklyn, nor the West Village, nor I-don’t-know-what-fancy neighborhood: This is freaking Harlem, for God’s sakes.
Forget for one second about those ridiculous prices: What the hell is a Tex-Mex veggerito? Why would anyone eat whole wheat tortilla chips? What’s with the alfalfa sprouts?
That’s it, New York hipsters & millennials, I’m coming to get you.
*Hyperventilates, runs to the nearest taquería*
NYC Farmers Market Joins Nonsensical Trend of Putting an ‘Ñ’ where it Doesn’t Belong
Remember that nonsensical trend of putting “eñes” where they don’t belong just to make something look — and sound — more authentic?
Well, it looks like American salsa makers, media giants and Hispanic journalists organizations are not alone in this thing. As it turns out, local farmers markets is New York City are on it as well.
¡Ay carambiña!
Photo: @Saltasolt
Click on the gallery below to see what I’m talking about and repeat after me: ¡Coño, aprendan a usar la eñe!
New York City Salon Will Give you the ‘Indian Virgin’ Look
I have no idea what this salon is up to, but in addition to a “refrigerio” Wednesday, they’re offering to implant you with the hair of an Indian virgin — for some reason.
Photo: Jessica Solt Inwood, NYC
Kate Spade Wants to Make Mariachis Great Again!
Mexican immigrants are not precisely popular these days –and I’m pretty sure we’ll all get deported real soon. But local mariachis are making their way to the world of high fashion, thanks in part to Kate Spade New York.
The brand has tapped the all-female mariachi band Flor de Toloache to tout its “timeless — and timely — collection,” which is full of “cute cultural references” and is now available on Kate Spade’s Website.*
WATCH as the all-female band gets on the [FAILING] New York City subway while model Fernanda Ly walks in sporting a “lace-trimmed flouncy dresses” and a handbag that features a tiny burrito or something weird like that.
*Alas, the fabulous black charro suits are not part of the collection’s offering.
Hat tip: @begona_lozano
It’s Hard to Miss Mexico When you Live in Nueva York
Follow me on Instagram using the hashtag #Manhatitlán (with an accent over the á) to see what I mean… I am a sucker for this pueblo.
Tandurero = The Mexican Guy who Runs your Tandoori Oven
Photo: Carolina González
Someone Made a Pizza Topped with Tacos and Guacamole, Because New Jersey
Tony Boloney’s, an eatery in — where else? — Hoboken, NJ, has concocted The Taco Pizza, an abomination made of queso Oaxaca, carne asada chipotle and a “solid heaping of cheese on top of pizza dough.”
Keep reading on the link below. I’m going to go throw up.
Via: Thrillist
Tamales Know no Borders
The so-called President can say whatever he wants, and build a wall as big as his ego, but my people continue to make this blogger (and many more Mexicans) very happy on this side of the border.
Photo: Laura Martínez, 2017. Harlem
Michael Jordan’s Steak House Now Serving $12 Tacos
New York City’s Michael Jordan’s The Steak House has jumped into the UTW (Unaffordable-Tacos-Wagon) with the introduction of a $12 New York strip taco, generously featuring guacamole *and* pico de gallo.
Please note that for that price you will only be able to order at the bar.. Were you to sit down at an actual table, this thing will probably cost you like 50 bucks or something.
This blogger has not tried, nor will try these things until she succeeds in accomplishing a long-time quest: to Make U.S. Tacos Affordable Again!
Photo: Brooklyn Taco Correspondent
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