I’m sure you know by now that Puerto Rico reggaeton sensation Raymond Ayala (aka Daddy Yankee) has endorsed McCain, the 72-year-old make believe ABBA fan, simply because -duh- they both seem to be very fond of La Gasolina.

So without further due, this blog is hereby endorsing the Marranito Ranchero, mostly because he truly embraces diversity:

“Me gustan las altas y las chaparritas, las flacas, las gordas y las chiquititas, solteras y viudas y divorciaditas; me encantan las chatas de caras bonitas…”

¡Ajúa!

The supposedly provocative book about Obama’s true religious upbringing is now available for all my hermanos en español. The Spanish-language translation comes courtesy of Grupo Nelson, which has also brought us several bible-related books and even a CD/DVD biography of Julissa.

In case you were wondering, the book’s point in Spanish is -not surprisingly- the exact same as its English-language counterpart: Barack Obama is NOT a Muslim (despite all you’ve heard and seen on Fox News.)

Oh, and it is endorsed by Archbishop Desmond Tutu, who tampoco is a Muslim.

…and that he is totally obsessed with Obama.

…Oh, and by the way: Can somebody tell McCain that “El mundo de acuerdo a Barack Obama” is an AWFUL, literal translation of what -we think- he means, “El mundo según Barack Obama”? Please, please, tell us he is not that bad!

Now that the U.S. government says it found the real source of salmonella (yes, again), this time in Mexican Serrano peppers, I decided to compile a list of extremely dangerous Mexican things you’d better stay away from if you seriously care for your life health.

In addition to tomatoes, jalapeños, avocados and chiles serranos, Please stay away from the following:

–Tacos *

–Cancún

–Sombreros

–Piñatas

–Wrestling matches

–Your abuela

—Chocomiles

–Chaparritas El Naranjo

–Pulparindos and Pelón Pelo Ricos

–Christian Castro concerts (It hasn’t yet been proven if these can give you salmonella, but they will certainly make you sick.)

*Taco Bell is OK (These are not real Mexican tacos and, according to the Mayor of Oklahoma City, they can even help you lose wait. The same applies to other fake Mexican things, including McSkillet burritos, Bud Micheladas, salsa picante Chi-chis, Chipotle wraps, etc.)

Well, I guess it’s all water under the bridge now. Not only the King of Spain this week received Hugo Chávez at the Royal Family’s summer retreat in Mallorca, but he was witty enough to give him a “¿Por qué no te callas?” T-Shirt.

“We caused a furor with that event. [the T-shirt] is a good souvenir, to laugh at for the rest of our lives every time we see it,” Chávez said.

Isn’t politics just great?

Forget about political views or the so-called growing clout of the Hispanic electorate. The main reason we (Latinos) will support Barack Obama in the upcoming presidential election is… well, simply because his sister, Maya Soetoro-Ng, looks like a Latina. (Never mind the fact that we will never be able to pronounce her name.)

Speaking to The New York Times, Cuauhtémoc Figueroa, the director of Obama’s Latino vote effort, said he thinks Ms. Soetoro-Ng will be sort of a trumpcard in the Senator’s Latino outreach efforts:

“She speaks fluent Spanish, with a Dominican accent, and looks Latina,” Mr. Figueroa said.

Really? He doesn’t tell us, though, if she is fond of mondongo and bachata or if she likes to wear provocative tight jeans and very low cleavages.

Ay, ay, ay!

Upon learning that the Hispanic population continues to growth at a dramatic speed, and that Hispanic babies now represent 24% of the nation’s total, the Republican presidential candidate had this to say:

Never mind “hacer historia” is really not a proper Spanish-language phrase, nor an accurate translation of “to make history”. This week is Superman Barack’s week and it should go down in the historia just like this.