Category: Stupid propositions

Marketing Ideas to Spice Up your ‘Cinco de Mayo’ 🌶

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No Mexican friends? No problem! Get yourself a few Insta-Mexicans!

Cinco de Mayo is definitely my favorite faux Mexican holiday in the U.S. And not because it’s an excuse to drink all day long and scream ¡Viva México! while thinking it’s our celebration of Independence, but because it brings out the stupidest best marketing gimmicks to sell everything, from spicy tattoos and sneakers for the three-legged, to senseless drink mixes, “ethnic” food and even cardboard Mexicans!

Below, you’ll find a few of my favorite marketing efforts around this mostly-gringo holiday.

Enjoy … and ¡Que viva México, cabrones!

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Party City Wants you to Wear a Taco Headband and Shake your Maracas, Because Cinco de Mayo!

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Cinco de Mayo is just around the corner, and the folks over at Party City are, like, super excited!

So for this year’s Authentic Mexican FIESTA™, the retailer is peddling a $4.99 Taco Headband; a $7.99 Taco Hat, and plenty of maracas, because the whiter you are, the harder you should work to look like a real Mexican.

¡Ajúa!

Hat tip: @EnriqueLimon

*LOL

NOT SURE YOU WANT A TACO HEADBAND? CHECK OUT OTHER SUPER AWESOME CINCO DE MAYO IDEAS BELOW:

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AMLO’s ‘Sharp Critique’ of Trump –and Trump’s Wall, now Available in English

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Mexican presidential candidate Andrés Manuel López Obrador is running on an odd platform, enlisting politicians from all walks of life (and political positions) to his campaign. And while his politics and rhetoric have pretty much divided the country, there is one thing he has in common with millions of Mexicans: His contempt for President Trump –and his proposed border wall.

And now, in hopes of making his message get across the border, his 2017 book has been translated into English.

I have not read this thing –nor I’m sure if I’ll ever do it, but according to an enthusiastic morning press pitch: ¡Oye, Trump! Saying Yes to a New Start for Mexico, Saying No to a Wall (OR Books) presents a “no-holds-barred condemnation of corruption in his own country and a sharp critique of what he regards as the baleful influence of the United States in Mexican politics, especially under the Trump presidency.”

Leguizamo Embraces Latino Tokenism –Because Latin Things

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Latino Tokenism Is a Thing

This blogger is not only tired of having worked 15 hours straight today. She’s also tired of weird Latin things like “Latino Tokenism” a term recently coined by comedian/entrepreneur Latin person John Leguizamo to explain why quotas (i.e. tokenism) are OK as long as Latinos get a piece of the trillion-dollar market we’re supposed to represent.

“I will take tokenism, quotas, just put one of us in there, he says. We are 20% of the population with $2 trillion in buying power […] That is the U.S. budget for this year. We have buying power. There is green to have, put us there, and you will see it,” Leguizamo said during a recent panel in Miami.

OK more tomorrow, I need to sleep –go dream of non Latin things.

 

Tijuana to Emulate the Iconic Hollywood Sign, because Mexico

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Why go to Hollywood when you can just go to TJ?

Having solved its most pressing issues, the city of Tijuana is working on emulating the iconic Hollywood sign in Los Angeles.

According to the Mexican press, the project was conceived –and is being financed– by the local Chamber of Commerce. It will be erected on the slopes of Colorado hill in the southeastern part of Tijuana at a cost of about $230,000.

The TIJUANA sign will be 15 meters high by 80 meters long and its letters would be illuminated with solar-powered lamps whose colors would randomly change.

Because, Mexico…

Via: Mexico News Daily

Peña Nieto Rebukes Trump in Video Message –Hilarity Ensues

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Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto, on Thursday, blasted Donald Trump in a video message, vowing that “nothing and no one stands above the dignity of Mexico” and adding basically that: “If your recent statements are the result of frustration due to domestic policy issues, to your laws or to your Congress, it is to them that you should turn to, not to Mexicans.”

Here’s Peña Nieto’s original tweet:

The response was pretty unusual, really, and Mexicans took to Twitter to express solidarity with their president but also some hilarious takes on the whole thing.

Here are only some of my favorite ones; I’ll be updating this as I see more (I gotta work, you know?)

You’re so cute when you’re mad

When EPN Defends Mexicans

 

Trump’s Reaction?

Lo que el viento a Juárez, Basically

Time to Fight for your Leader

In a Nutshell

And the Best Tweet of them all …

 

 

Woman Running DHS Says Replacing Current Sections of Border Wall Counts as New Wall 🙄

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Department of Homeland Security (DHS) Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen this week met with reporters to mumble something about Trump’s Big Beautiful Wall (TBBW.)

In a nutshell, Ms. Nielsen wants us to know is that expanding and/or enhancing Obama’s border fence should count as a new wall, because that’s how this administration rolls. I don’t really know what the hell she’s talking about, but it doesn’t matter either because nothing makes any sense anymore.

WATCH. Weep. Do NOT repeat.

The Irish Are Making Tacos, my Friends

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Corned-beef and cabbage? That doesn’t sound very “Irish” to me.

It’s almost St. Patrick’s Day and if you have been paying attention, this means Irish-Americans are getting ready to celebrate with… Irish tacos!

Yes, my friends, brave Irish men in America have been making tacos for some time now, some of them with terrific success. However, for the most part, these are basically a concoction of leftover corned beef and boiled cabbage, “decorated” with Jack cheese, horseradish sauce — “or maybe a creamy sauce made with some Guinness stout.”

I don’t know about you, but I’ll be sticking to drinking Irish (and/or non-Irish) stuff on Sunday, so thanks but no thanks.

Via: Journal Now

 

Donald Trump Goes to the U.S.-Mexico Border. Hilarity Ensues

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President Trump had the “brilliant” idea to visit San Diego to inspect several design prototypes for his proposed wall along the U.S.-Mexico border.

As I’m writing this, Mr. Trump was still at the border meeting with border patrol officers and wall-enthusiasts, so this post is only a taste of what’s to come.

Please check back later, as this post will be updated throughout the day with some of the most hilarious reactions to the visit, including –ahem, ahem– my very own (because, really, if I don’t laugh at my own jokes, who will?)

These people…

Go do something useful…

The Mexicans are OK

El Bisnes es el Bisnes

And the funniest thing that started it all!😂😂

https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsPhoto via Reuters

New York City’s New School Chancellor Is a Professional Mariachi. No, Really.

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If everything else fails, Richard Carranza can always go back to serenading las muchachas. ¡Ajúa!

From the Archives of I Could Not Make This Thing Up if I Tried comes Richard Carranza, the recently appointed New York City Schools Chancellor, who took a very unsual approach when discussing his new job with Mr. De Blasio and wife: He serenaded them with mariachi song María Elena.

His background is plain awesome. Per the [failing] New York Times:

At Monday’s news conference, Mr. Carranza said he had been a mariachi musician since he was about 6 years old. When he wanted to stay up late with his father and his uncles, they said the only people staying up late were people playing instruments — so he learned to play the guitar. He later worked his way through college at the University of Arizona “gigging,” as he put it on Monday.

Now you know. If running our disastrous public school system turns out to be too much for this fellow Mexican, he can always go back to serenading las muchachas. ¡Ajúa!

Just WATCH:

Via: New York Times

How to Turn a Chinese Restaurant into a Mexican One in Two Simple Steps

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Why throw away a perfectly nice painting when you can turn your pandas into Mexican pandas?

Need to turn a Chinese restaurant into a Mexican one?

EASY! Just add some sombreros –and trenzas– to the pandas on your wall paintings, and… boom! You got yourself a Mexican-themed establishment!*

That is exactly what the owners of El Sol Restaurant in Harrisonburg Virginia did –making this already the best thing this blogger has encountered in 2018.

P.S. Did you notice the cacti growing and red chili sprouting from the trees? 🌶

Via: Reddit. Hat tip @ConAudifonos

This Restaurant in Des Moines Lets you Make your Own Burrito, Because Des Moines

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I don’t know who did this, but they shouldn’t be making their own food.

It’s too bad Cosmo Kramer never fulfilled his idea of a cook-your-own-pizza-pie pizzeria. But you can thank Jaime Herrera, of Des Moines, for Happy Burrito, an “innovative” Mexican restaurant where you can build your own burritos. Yes, because really, how hard can this be? Plus, you are in Des Moines, so there’s probably not a whole lot to do there anyway.

But I digress. The point is that this thing is now open and surely pleasing the denizens of Des Moines (even though some of them have absolutely no idea of how to prepare anything.)

Via: Des Moines Register

Having Ran Out of Ideas, Televisa Preps ‘Like,’ a ‘Multiplatform’ Telenovela for the Modern Masses

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‘Like’ is a sequel to the super popular teen telenovela ‘Rebelde’

In an effort to lure the elusive teen audience, Mexico’s Grupo Televisa is working to bring us Like (Yes, Like as in “me gusta”) a teen telenovela that promises to “forever revolutionize” the novela genre.

And what kind of a revolution are we talking about here exactly?

“The goal is to introduce Internet and connectivity into the realm of telenovelas,” said producer Pedro Damián in an interview with Mexican television, explaining that –unlike your regular telenovela, Like is going to be a “multiplatform” one, because it will not only take place on TV, but on Twitter, Snapchat, Facebook and all that jazz.

But if none of the above is revolutionary enough for you, keep in mind this thing will take place in a “multiethnic school,” and feature kids from, like, a lot of countries and continents, that speak many languages, and… blah, blah, blah…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Via: Teleprograma