Click on the photo (above) to read more about the science behind this ranking, in which this blogger is — surprisingly — nowhere to be found.
Yeah, Hispanic Scholarships Sound like a Swell Idea, but Right Now We Need a ‘Delibrero’
Attention, New York Hispanics!
The Hispanic Scholarship Fund is offering help to “prepare, plan and pay for your children’s university,” which is, like, great, but let’s be honest: Chances are you’re going to end up in debt anyhow, and your children, cleaning toilets for Donald Trump.
But don’t despair. You might want to call the number above and get yourself a steady job as a “delibrero,” which I can assure you is an activity in high demand — at least in Hispanic Harlem.
Now, if being a “delibrero” is not your thing, you might want to consider this awesome sandwich opportunity, also in Harlem and — naturally — well paid. (NOTE: little to no English required. Yay!)
But hurry! the American Dream might not wait for you forever.
Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem, August 2015
Do You Know What Mexican M&M’s Look Like?
They look like regular M&M’s but more festive
Kickin’ Chicken Taco Pringles: Possibly the Only Thing Worse than Pringles Tortillas
Not content with giving us the Mexican-themed, culturally relevant Tortillas Crisps, Pringles is at it again, this time with a chicken taco chip thing called — what else? — “Kickin’ Chicken Taco,” which according to Pringles itself are naturally and artificially flavored and sit on top of a cartoon-like taco truck.
I don’t know if the Kickin’ Chicken Taco Chips are “truly original” (such a claim has gone suspiciously missing) but I’m pretty sure they taste like a Kick in Your You-Know-What.
I think I’ll pass.
Hat tip: Brooklyn, midtown taco correspondent J.P. Falcone
U.S. Opens Embassy in Cuba; Cubans Brace for the Dunkin’ Donuts Cuban Sandwich
It’s all over now.
During a historic celebration on Friday, U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry presided over a ceremony to reopen his country’s embassy in Havana.
Speaking in a fairly decent, Dora the Explorer-approved Spanish, Mr. Kerry (aka “Juan Querrico”) described the hoisting of the flag as a “historic moment,” as the beginning of an era of “real democracy” in which Cubans will be able to choose their leaders and — presumably — their non-Cuban meals too.
And we all know what this means. This means the pickled Dijon infused Dunkin Donuts Cuban Sandwich is now closer to real Cubans than ever before.
¡Pobrecitos!
This Ad Campaign Features ‘El Trumpo’ under the Threat of Dangerous Latinos
Miami-based Zubi advertising — which works for clients including Ford, Chase and American Airlines — has been making sure to operate under one simple motto: Erase Stereotypes.
So, in hopes of making the most out of the — still strong — Trump vs. Latinos brouhaha, Zubi has created a hilarious social campaign featuring — who else? — the King of Stereotyping My People (aka El Trumpo.)
VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: Despite my being Mexican and all, I did NOT steal these images. They were graciously offered to me by Zubi’s ECD Iván Calle. So, gracias for avoiding me a trip to the Copyright Infringement Offices.
He’s not only dangerous; he’s also MEXICAN!
Watch out for Colombians. They’re way more dangerous than Columbians
…And don’t get him started on Mario
Mexalert! Mexican Converse Spotted in New York City Subway
In yet another sign that New York City is quickly becoming a subsidiary of Mexico, a paisano was spotted recently in the city subway proudly wearing a pair of Converse All Star Mexican Flag Ajúa Edition.
Want to be as cool as my people but Converse are not your thing? You will want to check out these Nike beauties and — of course — the Cinco de Mayo Adidas.
Photo: @SallyNeiman
Jeb Bush Wants you to Support His Campaign by Buying a $75 ‘Guaca Bowle’
With the hilarious 2016 U.S. presidential campaign around the corner, candidates are going the extra mile to raise the much needed cash to be able to compete against the dumb-but-filthy-rich-candidate-type-people.
Take Newly Converted Hispanic Jeb Bush, who is asking you to pitch in $75 for the Guaca Bowle, a presumably-Made-in-China plasticky looking molcajete that I can find in Mexico City for, like, a fifth of the price.
But why a molcajete, may you ask? Well, because Jeb and wife Columba (not Columbia, nor Colombia) simply “Love whipping up guacamole on Sunday Funday.”
Ay, caramba!
Can someone please start working on a Guaca-Bowl piñata?
‘Hispanic Democrats for Trump’ Launches Ad Campaign
Luckily for this blogger, the world has become a much more entertaining place since famous, rich person Donald Trump (aka El Trompo) decided to declare war on my people (i.e. The Mexicans).
Thanks to Mr. Trump, this blog has seen the Trump Piñata, the Trump Corrido and — of course — the Latino car dealership awesome commercial.
So, I couldn’t be happy to introduce you to Hispanic Democrats for Donald Trump, a group that really — really — wants El Trompo to become the GOP candidate in 2016.
I mean… who wouldn’t?
Via: Advertising Age
This Latino Car Dealership in California Wants you to Buy a Nissan, Bash Donald Trump
The world’s awesomest car dealership has produced the world’s awesomest commercial, in which we see the dealership’s general manager bashing a Donald Trump piñata, after which he declares:
“Aquí en Van Nuys Nissan, los latinos mandan.” (“Here at Van Nuys Nissan, Latinos rule.”)
This blogger thinks this commercial should win a Lion at Cannes or something. Alas, the corporate suits over at Nissan Motor Co. have decided to distance the company from the ad, because… corporations.
So, boooooo, Nissan. Don’t be surprised if the next piñata my people come up with is one of your own Carlos Ghosn.
OMG! There’s a Bad Taco Situation at Litchfield Penitentiary
Even Russian inmate Galina ‘Red’ Reznikov suffers when tacos are not properly done.
I know, Red, I feel your pain…
Mexican Drones are Cooler than Regular Drones –Literally
Hat tip: @borrachito
Ridley Scott to Make Movie About El Chapo, Of Course
Well, that was fast.
According to The Internet, Hollywood director Ridley Scott is teaming up with studio giant Fox to produce a novel paralleling the life of escaped Mexican drug lord Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzman.
Details are still sketchy, but Mexican twitteratti are already full of awesome ideas.
Ridley Scott hará película acerca de la vida del Chapo Guzmán. Esto es lo que me imaginé: pic.twitter.com/Q8WSgnMiNE
— Vampipe ⍨ (@vampipe) julio 24, 2015
It’s Time for ‘Chicharrones’ at the U.S.-Mexico Border
…Because even Border Patrol agents get their cravings for greasy snacks every now and then.
Hat tip: Fernando Yee/Facebook
Mexican Entrepreneurship Knows no Limits
For the monolingual crowd: This auto repair shop in Mexico City is called “El Chapo,” simply because it specializes in car exhaust systems (escapes in Spanish.)
Bravo, bravo!
Via: M. Neuhaus
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