Tired of ‘Regular Thanksgiving?’ Make it a Latino Thanksgiving

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Photo: Saveur
Photo: Saveur

Let’s be honest: Just as any other holiday, Thanksgiving has become mostly another good reason to eat and drink in excess (at least in my case.)

But if a 3 pm “dinner” of turkey, pumpkin pie and cranberry sauce seems a little boring to you, you can always throw a “Latino Thanksgiving,” which basically means a three-day smörgåsbord of lechón, tamales, arroz, frijoles, elote, tostones, tequila, poker games — and plenty of dancing and family drama.

If any of the above sounds exciting enough, you are in luck.

Here are 8 SIMPLE STEPS to turn your regular Thanksgiving into a Latino one:

  1. Turkey? Who eats turkey? Run to the closest bodega and pick the biggest lechón available. Roast and stuff an apple on its mouth while you’re at it.
  2. Cranberry sauce? We don’t even know what that is. Get a mojo going or start a guajillo marinade for said lechón
  3. Start with plenty of tamales and make sure to serve rice, beans, gandules, tostones and/or plantains on the side.
  4. Pumpkin? Who eats pumpkin? Really. Pumpkin is only good when you use its flowers to make one of these.
  5. Start serving dinner at 10 pm, because, really, who has dinner at 3 pm?
  6. Once the meal is over, and liters of alcohol have been consumed, be ready for your mother, tía or abuela to start crying inconsolably over you not visiting more often, etc.
  7. No football. Who watches football? It’s not like it’s fútbol… Take out the baraja, the poker chips and open up the wallet.
  8. Turn up the music and dance like maniacs all night long. And do not worry about thy neighbor. Thy neighbor should be thankful to have a Latino family around. After all, what is Thanksgiving if not an opportunity to say gracias?

A Spanish-language version of this blog post first appeared on Univision.com

New York City Mayor Inaugurates the ‘México-Tenochtitlan’ Avenue, Sadly not Called Manhatitlán

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¡Viva México, Hijos de su Manhatitlán!

Say what you will about Bill de Blasio and Marcelo Ebrard, but thanks to this useless duo, this Mexican blogger can now proudly say she lives in a city that honors “México-Tenochtitlan” right at the intersection of 116th Street and Second Avenue.

Yes, having solved their respective city’s most urgent taskes, Mr. Ebrard and Mr. De Blasio formally inaugurated the “México-Tenochtitlan Avenue” in Manhattan, just around the corner of this blogger’s favorite tacos ever.

I don’t mean to cause any international incidents here, but WHY ON EARTH didn’t they just call this avenue Manhatitlán? It would mean so much for this humble blogger.

Damn you, Bill and Marcelo!

Via: Expansión

The Three Amigos Summit Is Always a Good Mariachi Wear Meme Opportunity

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I haven’t followed this week’s #ThreeAmigos Summit as closely as in previous years (you know? I’ve been super busy looking for a job.) Still, my timeline is an amusing patchwork of mariachi-wear jokes & cartoons. Some are good, some are great (see below), some are … meh (see above.)

This brilliancy from ‘The Globe and Mail’

Critizing the sombrero stereotype? Who has the energy any more?

AMLO Goes to New York City; Chairs Session at the U.N.; Hilarity Ensues

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On Nov. 9, 2021 AMLO tweeted: “At the UN Security Council in New York we proposed to establish a World State of Fraternity and Welfare that guarantees the right to a decent life for 750 million people living in poverty.”

At this point, it isn’t really a surprise that the “Mexican meme machine” is so amazing at its job that it should be protected by the UNESCO –or something.

In the latest example of what “my people” have done to immortalize President Andrés Manuel López Obrador 2021 visit to New York City, I give you some of the best memes echoing AMLO’s Nov. 9 posting proposing a “World Plan for Fraternity & Welfare.” (Ay, caramba!)

This blogger is super busy trying to get unemployment benefits to dwell too much on each of these, so please just scroll down, enjoy and -please- help me add to these by commenting on this post.

Grassy ass!

What started it all:

Moses, it you?

What heroes are made of

What dreams are made of…

 

CBS Wants you to Think La Palma Is Situated in the Iberian Peninsula LOL

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Move over, Latin American Hong Kong!

In yet another example of geographically-challenged TV networks, now comes CBS News placing La Palma in the Iberian Peninsula, in Murcia to be precise.

I am told the network quickly corrected the blunder, but this blogger’s job is to make sure it remains in the cyberspace, like, forever.

Ay, caramba!

Filing under: “Geography is our passion.”

Mexican President Preps Visit to NYC. Alas, He’ll Miss the Local Garnacha Action

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AMLO looooves a good local garnacha, but he might miss on my city’s Mexican delights this time.

Start spreading the news…
He’s leaving next week…

Mexican president Andrés Manuel López Obrador (aka AMLO) will be in the Big Apple for a short visit next week (Nov. 8 & 9) and while this blogger was eager to follow his culinary adventures in her adopted city, it looks like he will be missing out on the whole “Puebla York” experience.

According to press reports, AMLO will travel to the United Nations next week and give a speech about the dangers of corruption (no, really!) His visit corresponds with Mexico taking over the rotating presidency of the U.N. Security Council in November.

Alas, while his supporters at the “Morena New York Committee 1” are prepping a whole fiesta complete with mariachis –and plenty of local garnachas–, it looks like AMLO will remain at the UN and look all professional and stuff.

The 2021 AMLOFestNYC is free to the public and is to take place -where else?- at the Aztec Hall in Brooklyn. But the fiesta will have to go on without him.

A real pity if you asked me, since Manhatitlán is home of the best antojitos, garnachas and other Mexican goodies on this side of the border.

Ni modos, presi. Maybe next time! 

Back in CDMX –and it never felt so good

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Una puerta cualquiera en la Colonia Doctores. Laura Martínez, October 2021 (P.P.)

After 1 year, 7 months and eleven days, I’m finally back in my beloved CDMX (formerly known as D.F.) and while many things have changed -and Covid was truly devastating for many Mexicans I know- the simple beauty of my birth city and its sights & sounds remains undisturbed.

Since October 8, 2020, I have not only lost one job but two of them, and while things look pretty challenging right now, I’m very lucky to be back and to be able to hug my friends and family once again. Yes, I’ve been hugging people left & right… Take that, #PincheCovid!

Also, and given the extra time life is affording me right now, I have made some very important resolutions, like updating this blog sangüichero as often as possible and catching up on some very important reading material (see below.)

I’m not really sure what’s next. But first things first: I’m off to Ajusco for some sopa de hongos. ¡Ahí se ven!

The Economist Puts AMLO on Cover; Calls Him a ‘False Messiah.’ Hilarity Ensues

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British magazine The Economist wrote a scathing editorial critizicing Mexican president Andrés Manuel López Obrador (aka AMLO) and urging voters to “curb” the ambitions of the “power-hungry” leader.

Published in its May 29-June 4 edition, the piece made it to the cover, showing a photo composition of AMLO beneath the headline “Mexico’s false messiah.” The editorial compares AMLO, as the president is commonly known, to “authoritarian populists” Viktor Orbán of Hungary, Narendra Modi of India and Jair Bolsonaro of Brazil.

While the government officially dismissed the article as “very propagandistic” and even went as far as to send a letter to the editor, Mexicans (yours truly included) have tons of fun tweaking said cover. Once again, I’m happy to say that Mexican Twitter never disappoint.

Here some of my faves:

Mexico’s True Messiah: El señor de los tacos

Idea: (yours truly) Photoshop via: @zwiitt

Grande, Del Toro

JuanGa: El Mero Mero

El Buki

Giovanni Dos Santos

Two Covers. Two Truths

Last, but not least. Her Majesty La Concha

Hold on to your Sombreros: Cinco de Mayo 2021 Has Begun!

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T-Mobile does Cinco de Mayo with taco socks, maracas and the like.

No matter how many bizarre holidays Americans come up with, Cinco de Mayo will forever be my favorite. And not only because it’s an excuse to drink all day and yell ¡Viva México! while thinking it’s Mexican Independence (it’s not) but because it is also the time of year that brings out the stupidest most creative marketing brains to sell Americans everything, from DIY printable fiesta kits and taquito shooters (whatever that is,) to senseless drink mixes, “ethnic food” and even life-size cardboard Mexicans as scene setters.

Etsy T-shirts, anyone?

Nacho de Mayo, because why not?

This time around, though, in honor of that amazing marketing tool known as Twitter, I’ve put together a few tweets making their way to my timeline using the #CincoDeMayo hashtag. This has only begun, so, please help me by tweeting me your own personal horrors for 2021 Cinco de Mayo and let the “Mexican” madness begin!

T-Mobile

Barnsdall Art Foundation

Taco Johns – Ole The Day?

This reporter

This ‘Salsa’

Gluten-Free Churro Cupcakes

Mission Foods

Note: This post will be updated on a regular basis.