Inspired by Mexico, a Chicago Bakery Is Now Making its Own Conchavirus

They look more like happy frogs, but it’s the intention that counts, right?

Well, that didn’t take long.

Barely a couple of days after this VERY INFLUENTIAL BLOG first reported on the Iztapalapa conchavirus, a small bakery in Chicago is now making their own version.

“We wanted to turn a negative into a positive one by creating my very own conchavirus,” Eddie Vázquez, executive pastry chef and owner at Rosy’s Bakery, told ABC News Chicago.

Fortunately for Mr. Vázquez, Chicagoans are so excited about they’re placing their orders by the dozen, and I still don’t know how they get the courage to go out, but that’s another story…

It’s not a secret that 2020 sucks, but –heck– it has been a good year for conchas.

Tiny Mexican Hitting an ICE Piñata Is Truly Therapeutic

Say what you will about my people (i.e. The Mexicans) but they truly know how to let off some steam without being, like, super violent.

Take this children’s party in Chicago, where tiny, adorable children (like this cutie in a Peppa the Pig shirt) are seing hitting an ICE piñata and throwing balls into a painted image of President Trump.

A video circulating around social media is stirring some controversy among “certain sectors” (presumably non-Mexican sectors.)

As for this blogger, I have only one thing to say: ¡Dale, dale, dale, no pierdas el tino, porque si lo pierdes, pierdes el camino!

Via: ABC 13

This Chicago Bar Wants you to Bash Trump on Cinco de Mayo

extralargeChicago, the city with not one but Two Donald Trump toilets, is the proud host of the upcoming #ThumpTrump Cinco de Mayo Bash, a fiesta organized by a Lakeview beer & bourbon bar featuring a giant Trump piñata.

Like Mr. Trump would say, I think it’s terrific to give Chicagoans a chance to bash the Republican presidential front-runner, too. (Why would Mexicans have all the fun?)

I don’t know about you, but I’m already booking a plane ticket to the Windy City: Beer, bourbon, a Trump piñata… How can you go wrong?

Chicago Market Wants you to Know These Chips are ‘Hispanic’

Pyramid... the word 'Hispanic'... burros (donkeys). How can you go wrong?
A Pyramid, the word ‘Hispanic’, a caricature of a burro (donkey) on the bag…                                 How can you go wrong?

Marianos Market in Chicago seems to be aware of all the faux “Hispanic food” flooding the market these days, so it’s going the extra mile, labelling things properly, so customers can tell the difference between make-believe “Mexican food” and genuine Chichen Itzá-labelled, donkey-inspired corn chips.

¡Bravo! This blogger appreciates the effort. Really.

Photo: DonMarquito

 

Bracing for Changes in 14th Amendment, the Sepúlvedas Drop Lots of Babies in Matter of Days

I told you, people, it was just a matter of time before the GOP and other non-GOP gringos discovered our plot to take over their country. First it was the Queens mother who gave birth to six healthy babies in what is believed to be first sextuples ever born to a Hispanic couple in the U.S.

Now, according to the Associated Press, four sisters from one family have each given birth within four days. Yep, that’s four sisters, four babies, four days… And in case you were wondering, all these sisters are conspicuously named Sepúlveda or Pazos or López.

The same obstetrician delivered the babies of three of the sisters – 27-year-old Lilian Sepulveda, 29-year-old Saby Pazos and 24-year-old Leslie Pazos – in the same suburban Chicago hospital on Friday and Saturday. A fourth sister, Heidi Lopez, gave birth on Monday in California.

So there you have it, gringos, be afraid, people, be very afraid!

Is Sammy Sosa Trying to Pull a Michael Jackson?

SammyColor

Something very strange seems to be happening to Sammy Sosa, who was spotted last week in Vegas, while attending the Latin Grammys.

Rebecca Polihronis, a former Clubs employee, told the Chicago Tribune that Sosa’s lighter skin is nothing but the result of a skin rejuvenation process. “He is in the middle of doing a cleansing process to his skin,” she said.

That may very well be the case, but if you asked me, I think the retired ball player is only trying to get an invitation to El Show de Cristina or at the very least land a small role in a Mexican telenovela.

So let’s give him a break, damn it!

Photo: AP/Tribune/Getty