Sofía Vergara Transitions from ‘Rotating’ to ‘Leaning In’

Sofia

Last time the Colombian (not Columbian) bombshell was featured on this blog, she had been put to rotate 360 degrees during the annual EMMY’s award ceremony, because apparently that’s what you are supposed to do with hot, Latin women onstage.

This time, Vergara (aka the Colombian, not Columbian, bombshell) graces the May 2015 cover of Vanity Fair magazine, where she talks about many interesting things, including her [fake] accent and –what else?– her “Bombshell Empire.”

But she also talks about Leaning In, which I think it’s awesome and much more interesting than rotating.

Personally, I’m much more comfortable just lying down, but heck, that’s just me!

Unshocking Revelation: Sofía is ‘Variety Latino’ Top Latina

SofiaNumberOne

No Hispanic Heritage Month would be complete without a list of the most influential Latinos in Hollywood, so thanks Variety Latino, for putting that together.

According to Variety Latino, which is like regular Variety, but Latino, there are 20 Latinos who fit the bill as the most powerful/influential Latinos in Hollywood (uff, that’s a Latino mouthful.)

The list –which Variety says was not based on money earned– included 10 men and 10 women, among which is my favorite, retro-acculturated Latina: Eva Longoria (aka La Prieta Faya).

Number one of the list…. chan, chan! Sofía Vergara, who is richer and prettier than all of us.

Well, you have to give it to Variety Latino for not putting her on a rotating pedestal or anything.

‘Cristela’ is a Latin-themed TV Show I Might Actually Watch

'Cristela' stars Mexican-American comedienne Cristela Alonzo
‘Cristela’ stars Mexican-American comedienne Cristela Alonzo

Mexican-American comedienne Cristela Alonzo might not be as stunning as Sofía Vergara -and chances are the EMMY Academy will never put her on a rotating pedestal.

However, judging from the following trailer -and description- of the upcoming ABC comedy Cristela, she has the potential to help restore my faith in Latino-themed programming for the so-called English-language crowd.

Per a press release:

Cristela is in her 6th year of law school (having juggled family obligations and worked multiple jobs to pay her way); she lands an internship at a prestigious Dallas law firm.  She lives with her sister, her brother-in-law, their two young kids, and her old-school mom. Felix’s cousin and co-worker, Alberto flirts shamelessly with Cristela, but the only feeling she has for him is a shared passion for the Dallas Cowboys.

Well that sounds interesting. Let’s see if the show actually delivers and makes us all want more -or suffer the fate of so many other “Latino TV projects.”

It premieres Oct. 10, so I will -of course- be watching and keep you guys posted.

The EMMYs put Sofía Vergara on a Pedestal; Rotate her 360 Degrees to Show Commitment to Diversity

Sofia Vergara at the 2014 EMMYs
My favorite part was how the mention of what goes on ‘behind’ the cameras coincided with this image.

Bruce Rosenblum, chairman and CEO of the Academy of Television Arts & Sciences, took the stage last night at the 2014 EMMY Award ceremony to talk about diversity in the television industry.

And what better way of showing your commitment to diversity than putting Colombian actress Sofia Vergara on a pedestal, and rotating her to showcase her ‘talents’ in a 360-degree fashion?

Watch. Cringe. Repeat.

Ay, Caramba! 

Sofía Vergara has that ‘Latin Thing’ i.e. Curves and a Big Behind

People

Don’t you just love it when famous people fall in love? Take actor Joe Manganiello, who has been caught cozying up to Colombian bombshell Sofía Vergara.

But how does he feel about her?

“She has that Latin thing. She has a backside; curves, a pretty face, pretty hair,” Manganiello tells People magazine.

And that is great, you know, because last time I checked, non-Latinas didn’t have curves, backsides, pretty faces or pretty hair.

Oh, Joe, you lucky dog!

Sofía Vergara Shows Twitter Critics What She’s Made of

SofiaVergaraTwitter

The latest installment of Jimmy Kimmel‘s Celebrities Read Mean Tweets, included some hilarious segments, in which celebrities read mean-spirited tweets about themselves.

My favorite was, of course, Sofía Vergara, who was criticized by user @mamaowl_kirby for her apparently impossible accent. Upon reading the tweet:

“Sophia [sic] Vergara sounds like she has a d**k in her mouth,” the Colombian bombshell replied in a way only she could get away with:

“What’s wrong with having a d**k in my mouth?”

Sofía Vergara Launches ‘Ethnic’ Fragrance, Because One Can Never Have Enough Money

sofia-fragranceIt has been a while since I bug you guys with Latino celebrities and their Latino fragrances, so bear with me.

A bit late, but not to be outdone by the likes of Paulina Rubio, Shakira, Antonio Banderas and even José José, the super-famous, super-rich, super-accented and super-ubiquitous Sofía Vergara is the latest Latina celebrity to announce her own fragrance, which will appear sometime in April in U.S. department stores.

In an inexplicably long article, Sofía Vergara told Women’s Wear Daily that her fragrance will have orchids and roses, not only because they are her favorite flowers, but because they are also Colombian.

“I wanted to bring a little bit of who I am, my ethnicity, where I’m from, and I thought it was very cool to be able to get flowers from Colombia actually into the perfume.” 

I am sure she said all of this in an impossibly accented English, which is fine when you consider that is part of her charm and definitely the secret behind her many millions of non-ethnic money.

New Hispanic Venture Launches in Lorem Ipsum-Language

Screen shot 2013-08-19 at 11.17.48 AM

Hispanic online media has grown to be so sophisticated, that we have web properties targeting English-dominantSpanish-dominant and even Spanglish-dominant Latinos.

But a new contender, www.LatinaMadre.com, wants to disrupt the whole industry by launching a page in Lorem Ipsum, which is great, really, considering it’s going to be about Latina moms, and Latina daughters and Latina moms and daughters, which all sound like blah, blah, blah to me.

(Or rather, like lorem ipsum, lorem ipsum, lorem ipsum to me.)

Screen shot 2013-08-19 at 11.13.12 AM

Leno, Vergara Loooove Dulce de Leche…. Gordon Ramsey Thinks it Tastes Like S**t

In case you missed it, Colombian (nor Columbian) bombshell Sofía Vergara went to Jay Leno this week, apparently to talk about Modern Family, but ultimately to pitch Alpina’s Dulce de Leche, which by the way Chef Gordon Ramsey thought tasted like “shit.”

In a public statement, Carlos Ramírez, a spokesman for the U.S. subsidiary of Alpina said: “We were pleased that Sofia Vergara chose Alpina’s Dulce de Leche and we are very happy that Jay Leno liked it.”

Perhaps, what Mr. Ramírez really, really wanted to say was: “We couldn’t care less that Chef Ramsey didn’t like it. What do British people know about food, anyway?”