This blogger is too busy to blog right now, but you get my point.
Author: Mi Blog es tu Blog
This Chocolate Bar Is a Delicious Mix of Testicles and Google Translation
Because, really, how else were you going to translate ‘Triple Nut Bar?’
Hat tip: Teresa Bouza
Dominique Ansel and Alex Stupak Think this Thing Is a Taco
Dear Dominique Ansel and Alex Stupak,
I seriously think you guys are lovely and all, but can you please — PLEEEEASE — not call your “swirl of roasted corn caramel, lime zest, sea salt, and smokey salsa verde on the side” concoction an ice-cream taco?
See? I’m getting old and can die from a heart attack real soon.
Thank you in advance for your cooperation
Hat tip: Ridiculous NYC food correspondent Lisa Paravano
This Austin Sex Shop Wants you to Burn Like a Latin Lover
Are you about to get intimate with that hot gal/dude you bumped into while Pokémon Go-hunting? If so, why burn any incense when you can burn a Latin Lover-themed one?
Behold the “Latin Lover premium hand-dipped shorties,” now on sale at Cindy’s Sex Shop* in Austin, Texas.
*Don’t ask
The Mexican Government Wants You to Know El Chapo Has not Escaped Again –Yet
My country is the bestest…
On Friday night, after rumors that El Chapo Guzmán had escaped from a Mexican prison for the third time began appearing on social media, Mexico’s Secretary of the Interior, Miguel Osorio Chong, posted the above photo, with one simple message: “For the rumors, an image…”
Osorio Chong’s tweet was not only liked and retweeted by thousands of tuiteros, but it proved — once again — that Mexico is home of the surreal and the truly hilarious.
Wanna see the memes about this photo? Check back soon. This blogger is too busy planning her summer vacation working
Para los rumores, una imagen… pic.twitter.com/REgkwIlMuJ
— Miguel A.OsorioChong (@osoriochong) 9 de julio de 2016
Mexicans Mock Avocado Shortage with Hilarious Memes
OK, you know the drill. No matter how tragic a situation will get, Mexicans will always see the funny side of the whole thing.
And the avocado shortage of late is no exception.
In case you have no idea what’s going on, prices of avocado have risen by more than 90 percent since the end of 2015, mostly because Mexico’s biggest ever harvest is coming to an end and a new one is not yet ready. On top of that, the shortage has coincided with a sharp fall in U.S. production caused by heatwave in California, hitting the the Fourth of July weekend, the second largest avocado consumption event of the year in the U.S. after the Super Bowl.
You might think an avocado shortage in a place like Mexico would be no laughing matter, but then again, you do not know Mexicans.
Here are some of my faves, explained for the monolingual crowd.
GET ONE KILO OF AVOCADO: SIX MONTHS WITHOUT INTEREST
2. WHEN YOU WANT AVOCADO IN YOUR TORTA, BUT YOU ARE POOR
3. SHOULD I BUY A KILO OF AVOCADO OR AN IPHONE 6?
JUST THROW SOME EXTRA AVOCADO TO THE AVOCADOS
CARLOS SLIM LOSES HALF HIS FORTUNE AFTER ORDERING ENCHILADAS WITH EXTRA AVOCADO
MARRY ME; I’M LOADED
Mexican Reporter Goes to Flood Area, Asks Locals to be Carried to Avoid Water. Hilarity Ensues
A reporter in Mexico went to cover massive floods happening in Puebla, and was caught by another reporter being carried by the locals, obviously in an effort to, well, not get wet.
The original tweet (below) from reporter José Daniel Hernández simply read: “How embarrassing! @LydiaCumming, a reporter with @TVAztecaPuebla asks for help in order not to get wet.”
¡Vergonzoso! @LydiaCumming , reportera de @TVAztecaPuebla , pide que la carguen para no mojarse. #LadyReportera pic.twitter.com/RVPhevxs2A
— José Daniel Hdez (@jodherlo) 27 de junio de 2016
What followed, naturally, was a flood of tweets that have this blogger dying of laughter. Below some of my favorites. (Apologies in advance if I do not credit each one of these properly, but Twitter can be a free-for-all stealing thing.)
#SharkAttack
AT THE THREE AMIGOS SUMMIT
JUST LIKE RONALDO
L RING
VAMPIPE, OF COURSE
#LadyReportera le gana en una carrera a Peña Nieto en Canadá. pic.twitter.com/6O3RmhK8IR
— Vampipe ⍨ (@vampipe) 28 de junio de 2016
Going to Vegas? Look out for a Trio of Latina Swindlers
It took me a while to realize this was not an ad touting the latest Latina-escort service, but a regular daytime TV commercial to entice you to Visit Las Vegas.
Watch as a trio of apparently-innocent señoritas set out to trick a bunch of gringos into believing that they just arrived and it’s their first time in Vegas.
Psssst: It’s NOT!
Hat tip: Marco Lopez
360 Camera Is so Great, It Will Let you Spot Mariachis Sneaking through the U.S. Border
360fly Inc. has decided to launch a “provocative” ad campaign to pitch a camera that promises to give you a broader perspective of life.
To that end the company crafted what it’s supposed to be a satire of Donald Trump and his anti-Mexican discourse, speaking about his HUGE — yuge! — wall only to be interrupted by a bunch of Mexicans (mariachis, gardeners, maids and churro vendors) sneaking through the wall –aided by Clinton and Sanders.
Per a company press release:
The campaign strategically leverages the national and global interest in the 2016 presidential campaign, with a hysterical satire of Donald Trump’s “Border Wall” campaign initiative, complete with a Trump impersonator, Hillary and Bernie look-a-likes, Mexican Mariachi bands, housemaids, gardeners and even churro cart vendors. That’s right…churro cart vendors.
Yeah, churro cart vendors.
The company claims the spot is “so controversial” it has been refused by a bunch of networks, mostly because stations said they wanted to “remain politically neutral” and “didn’t want to offend certain ethnic groups.”
As a member of one of the “ethnic groups” portrayed in this thing (watch below), I don’t find the commercial particularly offensive. However, I do find it a bit dull and that, my friends, offends me more deeply.
WATCH and decide for yourself:
Via: CNET en Español
The Upcoming New York City Floating Taco and Tequila Festival Proves the Apocalypse Is Near
Got $28 and a penchant for eating tacos and drinking tequila while on a cruise ship?
If so, head to New York City on July 9 for the T&T, a “Floating Food Festival” where you’ll be treated with, well, tacos, tequila and — very likely — a violent sea sickness.
VIP admission is $45 but it might be worth it because you’ll get a free “MARGARTIA,” [SIC] which I assume is something better than a MARGARITA.
¡Ay, Dios mío!
Via: Time Out
Today in Mexican to English Translations…
I can only hope Fiesta Inn Hotels in Guadalajara, Mexico pays its employees well enough to go Google Translate stuff. For the gringos, you know?
Hat tip: Roberto Morán
Everything is Better in Spanish, Including ‘Orange Is the New Black’ [Feat. Soraya Montenegro]
The rumors were true — and the wait is over.
Soraya Montenegro, the evil stepmother of Mexican telenovela María la del Barrio, has finally ended up where she belongs: In prison.
More specifically, Litchfield Penitentiary.
¡Sí, señor! Montenegro (played many years ago by the great Itatí Cantoral) is the star of a new Netflix campaign to promote the fourth season of Orange Is the New Black in Latin America.
So far so good, but Netflix would be well advised to extend a big GRACIAS to Cristian Vazquez, an 18-year-old from Danbury, Connecticut, who is credited with catapulting Soraya to viral fame by posting screenshots and videos of her on his Tumblr page.
“I first saw a picture with the same caption of another actress, Victoria Ruffo, and then thought it would be funny to do the same,” Vazquez told the Daily Dot. “After posting the first photo of Soraya Crying in Spanish it became very popular because of a video of her acting in the telenovela Maria La Del Barrio, in which she, the villain, tries to kill three people. The majority of the people on Tumblr have never seen a telenovela and are not familiar with the exaggerated acting style, and so they found it hilarious.”
Yes, Soraya is awesome and Netflix’ promo video is hilarious. Watch it below but — more importantly — don’t forget to thank Cristian Vazquez.
A Taste of Mexico for Less than £2
Aren’t the British something?
Not content with giving us the Hey Ho to Mexico gluten-free tortillas, the Brits are now peddling Mexicana Slices… slices of cheddar with spicy bell and jalapeño chilli peppers. For a mere £11.50 per kilogram, these babies promise the Original HOTNESS of the HOT taste of Mexico. But how hot is “hot” exactly?
Mexicana brings together traditional British farmhouse cheddar cheese, with the colour, vivacity and mouth-watering flavours of Mexican cooking. Not for the faint hearted, Mexicana has an abundance of bell peppers and hot chilli spices. Dare you… it bites back!
Do I dare?… Mexicana Cheese wants to know.
Mmmmm Nope.
Hat tip: London Spicy Correspondent: Kent German
Crowdfunded Nuni Toaster Wants you to Believe Tortillas Need to be Toasted [They Don’t]
If you thought Flatev was a stupid tortilla-related, crowdfunded project, wait until you see Nuni, a “revolutionary” Indiegogo project that promises to give us “the world’s first tortilla toaster,” which is basically a toaster-looking-gadget to, ahem, “toast” tortillas.
I hate to rain on Nuni Toaster’s parade, but last time I checked tortillas needed not be toasted, because, you know? that doesn’t make ANY sense!
Seriously, guys, I appreciate the enthusiasm — especially the VIVA LA TORTILLA tagline — but do me a big favor and go toast something else?
Thank you for your cooperation.
Chile Defeats Mexico 7-0 at Levi’s Stadium; Hilarity Ensues
Mexico suffered its most dramatic defeat Saturday night against Chile, losing 7-0 at the Copa América quarter finals in Levi’s Stadium in California.
While many paisanos are still licking their wounds, Mexican Twitter saved the day by producing some of the best memes we’ve seen so far in Copa América. These are happening “as we speak” so be sure to check back as they can only get better.
Oh, and be sure to follow CNET en Español for more memes en español.
Ready? Set. GO!
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