Somebody Should Have Consulted me Before Marketing This *Thing* to Children
Category: Marketing & Advertising
MARK YOUR CALENDARS! Oakland’s Pride Latinx Stage to Feature a Bunch of Sombrero-Wearing Machos
Mexican Daily Jumps on the ‘White Supremacy’ Bandwagon, Because Nothing Makes Sense Anymore
Not Photoshop. Not an Internet meme. This is the actual front page of today’s sports section of Reforma, one of Mexico’s largest daily newspapers. In case you were wondering, the “white supremacy” (in this instance) is that of the Real Madrid after it beat Barcelona 2-0 on Wednesday night. They wear white uniforms, get it? Ha Ha Ha.
Anyway, I believe I don’t need to tell you how timely the above headline is as it comes on the heels of the deadly mass riots organized by white nationalists — and self-described Neo-nazis — in Charlottesville, Virginia this past weekend.
Good job, Reforma… [SIGH]
Hat tip: @jrisco
Taco Bell Launches the Naked Egg Taco, Because there’s not Enough Misery in America
And just when I thought life couldn’t be more miserable, Taco Bell today announced the national rollout of the “Naked Egg Taco,” a “thing” that for a while was only available to the poor souls of Flint, Michigan.
“The Naked Egg Taco strips down the traditional breakfast taco, allowing us to deliver a new flavor experience in every single bite,” said Liz Matthews, Chief Food Innovation Officer at Taco Bell Corp, apparently with a straight face.
In case you were wondering, this “thing” is filled with fried potatoes, cheese, sausage or bacon and will roll out nationwide on August 31 at a bargain price of $1.99.
OK. Send in the nukes, people, I’m ready…
New York City Salon Will Give you the ‘Indian Virgin’ Look
I have no idea what this salon is up to, but in addition to a “refrigerio” Wednesday, they’re offering to implant you with the hair of an Indian virgin — for some reason.
Photo: Jessica Solt Inwood, NYC
Kate Spade Wants to Make Mariachis Great Again!
Mexican immigrants are not precisely popular these days –and I’m pretty sure we’ll all get deported real soon. But local mariachis are making their way to the world of high fashion, thanks in part to Kate Spade New York.
The brand has tapped the all-female mariachi band Flor de Toloache to tout its “timeless — and timely — collection,” which is full of “cute cultural references” and is now available on Kate Spade’s Website.*
WATCH as the all-female band gets on the [FAILING] New York City subway while model Fernanda Ly walks in sporting a “lace-trimmed flouncy dresses” and a handbag that features a tiny burrito or something weird like that.
*Alas, the fabulous black charro suits are not part of the collection’s offering.
Hat tip: @begona_lozano
Watch Out, Geico! Here Comes El Martillo Tejano
Who cares if switching to Geico can save you 15 percent or more on car insurance?
If I were to have a car — or live in Texas — (both very unlikely scenarios) I’d totally call Jim Adler, aka El Martillo Tejano, who promises to protect my people (i.e. The Hispanics) from sleazy insurance companies and give us the most compensation possible in case of a car accident.
Watch Adler inform us about his services in the best Gringo-Spanish I’ve heard in a while.
Take it away Jim!
Ever Wanted to Drive Like an Inca from Baja? Go Get Your ‘Ethnic-Style’ Wheel Cover Today!
From the online retailer that brought us the Mexican Deluxe Yoga Mat, the Hispanic Flag and — of course — the DIY Tacos al pastor, now comes the Baja Inca Blanket Steering Wheel Cover Plush Poncho , an “ethnic, fun, fashionable” wheel cover for your pimped up lowrider!
Because everybody knows the Incas from Baja California are one colorful driving bunch, right?
Hat tip: @SaraChicaD
Mexican Veganism Is Veganism I Can Actually Embrace 🐷
Are you a MEAT lover, but want to get into the whole healthy-vegan-kale-gluten-free hipster BS trend thing?
Worry not. My people have come up with an amazing idea!
I give you Vegan Bread Crumbs, a gluten-free, vegan product you can safely use to bread your fish, chicken and — YES — steak.
All this is good news, because veganism is great but, come on, you gotta eat animals!
Chomp, chomp… 🐷
Move Over, ‘Guardians of the Galaxy;’ Mexico Wants you to See ‘Guardianes de la Galatzia’ Instead
It is becoming increasingly difficult to keep blogging, when Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Stories et al keep beating me to the punch, like, by the second. But there are things that are just so beautiful that they deserve to be immortalized in this venerable, non-for-profit, read-by-nobody blog. And this is one of them.
So there. Enjoy. And repeat after me: “Mexicans: How can anyone not love us?”
This Laser Hair Removal Biz in Brazil Wants you to Know Frida Would Have Been Better off Using their Services
Some laser hair removal shop in Brazil called Espaçolaser thought it would be a great idea to use a Before-After image of Frida Kahlo showing how unbelievably different (presumably better) she would have looked AFTER undergoing a hair laser removal therapy with them.
Well, I’ve got news for you, people:
Ummmm, no!
Go home, Espaco Laser, you’re drunk.
This Fashion Designer Will not Leave Home Without Tajín, Because Life without Mexican Spices Is Dull
As Mr. Bastion himself wrote in New York magazine:
I’ve seen people use it to rim a margarita glass, to shake on watermelon and oranges, or on scrambled eggs. Amazing on corn on the cob. It’s great on everything, particularly in the summer. Keep it in your carry-on and go crazy.
So far so good, Michael, and we’re willing to go crazy with you, but here’s a useful, free-of-charge piece of advice: Why pay $9 for a 14 oz. Tajín bottle in Amazon when you can buy, like, dozens of those in Mexico for that price? I mean, nobody wants to be taken for a ride, and I’m sure you’re not the exception…
You are welcome.
Hat tip: @minsd
Marketing English Lessons in Mexico Is No Brainer
This Beer Features Donald Trump Wearing a Mariachi Hat and a Swastika Belt Buckle — for some Reason
People have got to stop doing this.
According to my sources (i.e. the World Wide Web) Mexican and U.S. brewers have gotten together to reinvent Donald Trump as a “gun-slinging mariachi” to promote Amigous, a beer supposed to “celebrate cross-border cooperation.” But the gun is only the beginning. From the little I could read, Trump’s trousers are held up with a swastika belt buckle, and the rear label of the beer informs the reader that the 71-year-old New Yorker belongs “in a mad house, not the White House.”
The “innovative” product comes on the heels of the Trump-inspired toilet paper and other crazy ideas out there.
I am not going to spend too much time on talking about this thing, because 1) I’m super busy and 2) It’s almost impossible to keep up with all the marketing nonsense around our current administration and the dark, sad hole we’ve all fallen into.
So… wake me up in 2024, will ya?
Via: Univision
The Most Interesting Man in the World Is Giving up Beer for Tequila
It was not long ago that Jonathan Goldsmith, the Dos Equis’ original — and devastatingly handsome — Most Interesting Man in the World was replaced by an uninteresting French dude in an effort to appeal to millennials.
Well, I’m happy to report Mr. Goldsmith has a new gig, and it has to do with drinking something way more interesting than watery beer. Starting this month Goldsmith will be the new face of Astral Tequila, because — really — that’s what you’re supposed to drink when you’re a grown up, handsome, interesting person. (I’m just going to have to investigate about that particular brand of tequila, which honestly sounds a bit fishy.)
The full ads are not out yet, but a video teaser uploaded this week by Davos Brands shows us the very interesting Mr. Goldsmith, surrounded by beautiful women, of course, and telling us: “I told you, I don’t always drink beer.”
Hopefully, Mr. Goldsmith will remember not mention Dos Equis by name.
Hat tip: Gonzalo J. Suárez
