Dancing -albeit sans grace– and pretending to like Presidente beer. How else?
Category: Politics
Does this Guy Strike you as a Mayor?
Not at all, says Mr. Rush Limbaugh, who upon meeting Antonio Villaraigosa thought he was a “shoeshine guy” or a secret service agent at best.
According to a Portfolio blogger, during an interview this week with -who else?- Fox News, the right-wing radio blabber commentator recounted his first meeting with Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa.
“I shook [Clinton’s] hand, he left, comes back [with] the mayor of Los Angeles,” he told listeners. “I thought it was a Secret Service agent, maybe a shoeshine guy. Turns out he gives me his card, I said, ‘Oh, my gosh, it’s the mayor of Los Angeles.'”
Mr. Villaraigosa is said to be considering a response to Mr. Limbaugh. So, while he makes up his mind, go ahead and help him find a good one:
“The first time I saw Mr. Limbaugh I thought… [Fill in the blank]”
Imagine: Gringos Sing Mexico’s National Anthem
If you have never heard of Pangea Day you’re in for a weird real treat: As part of the organization’s“Imagine” anthem series, you can see a bunch of mostly white, well-dressed -and presumably non-Hispanic- Americans singing Mexico’s National Anthem somewhere along the U.S.-Mexican border, while “real” Mexicans pass by them wearing jorongos and looking kind of hopeless, until a fence magically comes down.
Oh, dear! I think I’ll go puke… or at least take a bite of my Margarita-flavored chocolate bar.
Hide your Blackberries. The Mexicans are Coming!
I’m sure you don’t know this, but we Mexicans are very fond of fruit. This was evident this week during Felipe Calderón’s NAFTA meeting in New Orleans:
“A Mexican government official who was in Washington DC to advance the meeting in New Orleans between President Bush and Mexican President Calderon was caught stealing Blackberries off of a table that didn’t belong to him,” according to Fox News.
The alleged blackberry thief, Rafael Quintero Curiel, has flatly denied everything and is demanding an investigation.
He just wanted a fruit salad!
Global ‘Warning’: Baja is Gone. Again
Forget about the Absolut fiasco or my -unsuccessful- attempt to boycott UPS. The latest geographical offense comes courtesy of Mr. Al Gore and his WE-wee $300-million-dollar campaign. Look carefully at the following map and answer the following questions:
-Where the hell is Baja California?
-Why does the area pertaining to Mexico bears the words “tofu” and “burger?”
-Since when do we salsa-dance in Patagonia?
-Why is the term “police criminals” only found in Central America?
These are, folks, just some questions to chew on. You never know with people who despise Latin America… One has to be always vigilant. Hasta la vista, baby!
When the Going Gets Tough… Ban Taco Trucks
The Associated Press reports this morning that Los Angeles County has passed a law making it a misdemeanor crime for taco trucks to stay in a spot longer than one hour. The reason?
“Many restaurants are forced to close their doors because they cannot compete with a catering truck’s prices,” said Louis Herrera, president of the Greater East Los Angeles Chamber of Commerce. “It’s unfair competition.”
Maybe if the area restaurants were to serve better food, they might be able to compete with a delicious, greasy and contaminated street taco… That said, consider how taco-trucker attorney Phillip Greenwald came to the defense of the taqueros ambulantes:
“This is parking, after all,” he said. “They’re not selling porn, they’re not selling drugs. This is food and beverages.”
Well, Mr. Greenwald, you just gave Mexican taco truckers an excellent idea!
Wanted: White-Collar ‘Jornaleros’
Thanks to AdAge’s blog editor Ken Wheaton for flagging this one up. It’s simply brilliant (and makes me wonder what the Absolut boyocotters will make out of it). Enjoy!
South America According to The Washington Post
Will the editors at the Washington Post kindly point ‘Columbia’ in a map? I think it’s somewhere around West Harlem, but I’m not sure.
We Querer Mucho America (the Continent, that is)
The Inter-American Development Bank (IDB) knows a lot about screwing financing the Thirld World, and now it wants to say so with a song.
On Friday, at its Annual Meeting in Miami, the IDB launched Yo Amo America [sic] campaign, “an advocacy and social marketing initiative” featuring Ricky Martin, Juanes and Juan Luis Guerra among others.
Oh.. and by the way: to some of the geographically-challenged people commenting on my March 31 Absolut Vodka posting, America is a continent not a country.
Chávez Says ‘No’ to Mice and Passwords
The Bolivarian Revolution has now declared war to … the English language.
By presidential mandate, Venezuelans are now being asked to avoid the use of English-language business and tech words. Included in the Spanish-only campaign are: staff, marketing, passwords, mouse, meeting. So from now on, when in Venezuela, please stick to personal, mercadeo, contraseña, ratón and reunión.
A massive campaign launched this week by CANTV is exhorting Venezuelans to “Say it in Spanish. Say it with pride.” (In Spanish, of course)
And in case you are wondering what I think about the whole thing: I think Chávez is not crazy. He’s just muy loco!
Photo: France24
¡Ay Jalisco, no te rajes!
And you thought you had seen it all….
Univision’s ‘Jorge Ramos’ Makes it to SNL
You know Univision has made it to the big leagues when one of its main anchors is mocked at by the cast of Saturday Night Live. During a hilarious 6-minute spoof about the media’s obsession with Barack Obama, Jorge Ramos is actually introduced as Univision anchor and an official Obama stalker; someone who has a very unhealthy obsession with the Illinois Senator.
Senator Obama–Oh, my god! I’m so nervous. I still can’t believe I’m actually talking to you…OK: As you know, uh, Senator, as I explained in the letter that I duct-taped to your front door–and I’m sorry that it went on so long. I just, uh, I just really, really, really, really, really want you to be the next President. And not just because you’re a fantastic human being and the only person who can turn this nation around, but, you know, also because deep down I really and truly believe that it is destiny that you and I will one day be together. That you will become a part of me, and I a part of you. Joined as one.
The complete video can be seen here
Trading Lazy Missourians for Less Lazy Mexicans
If you thought you had seen (and heard) it all about politics and immigration, consider Rod Jetton, a Missouri politician who is offering to trade lazy locals for hardworking Mexican immigrants.
“I think there are some lazy Missourians in this state who really don’t want to work, and I think there’s a lot of hardworking Mexicans who would love to come up here and make a little money to support their families,” he told the Associated Press. “And by golly, if we could find a way to trade them, I would trade them in a heartbeat.”
Way to go, Mr. Jetton! I, for one, would love to trade political speeches like yours for the ones that really put us to sleep.
z z z z z z z z z z z z z z z z z z z !!
Mexico Wants to Know Why Mexicans Leave (Duh!)
Here’s a good one. The Mexican government is asking Mexican nationals living abroad to send in their migratory tales to participate in a worldwide writing contest aimed at getting a “better sense of how their former citizens live abroad, what drove them to leave Mexico, what challenges they face and what they need to integrate and succeed, particularly in the United States.”
(Well, wouldn’t the Mexican government just have to look at its own policies to figure out what drove people out? duh!)
In any case, the lucky winner will receive a prize of approximately $2,000 in cash and a free trip to Mexico to accept the award. Yupi!
But wait a second: how are they going to send them back to the U.S.? will they be needing extra polleros? (just asking).
Dallas Attorney Didn’t Know Mexicans = Beaners
Remember that ridiculous story about Beaner’s Coffee changing its name because it didn’t want to offend Hispanics? Well, now a poor Dallas lawyer is taking the heat for comparing the difficulty of counting the number of Hispanic voters in a city with guessing the number of “beans in a jar.”
“The two methods presented in this case to determine if there is a Hispanic voter majority in the plaintiffs’ district bring to mind the contest where customers are asked to guess the number of beans in a large jar,” attorney C. Robert Heath wrote in a legal brief on behalf of Farmers Ranch (that same place that doesn’t like Mexicans painting their homes in colors)
According to the Dallas Morning News, Mr. Heath has since apologized saying he wasn’t familiar with the slur. “It was just an analogy, and obviously it was ill chosen because it was offensive to some persons,” Mr. Heath said. “That was entirely unintentional, and I apologize for it.”
Shame on you Mr. Heath. If you really know Mexicans, you should know what we’re all about.
That’s it! I’m off to have a big plate of frijoles. Ajúa!
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