If you survived Black Friday and managed not to be trampled by some lunatic mob at your local Walmart, chances are you’re already planning your Christmas vacation. But if you are like the average American whimp person, it is very likely Mexico is not among your top ten winter destinations.

According to the most recent survey coming out from the land obsessed with surveys, 72% of Americans think Mexico is unsafe, and not because they fear they will go into a cardiac arrest for gulping down tons of cheap tequila in Cancún. They are mostly concerned about being shot by some druglord as soon as they set foot at the airport.

But weary Americans should not despair, and instead thank the nation’s undocumented and documented Hispanic immigrants for the latest trend in U.S. tourism: Latin American cultural immersion trips in the comfort of your own city.

¡Sí, señor! Latinos are using the neighborhoods we’ve taken away from gringos to lure them back, and invite them to get a taste of our fun, dance, food and drink-filled culture. And no, you don’t need to get a passport, nor take a malaria pill. And -more importantly- chances of surviving are actually at a healthy 95%

So, what are you waiting for? Come enjoy U.S. Latin America without the dangers and annoyances of the real Latin America.