This Beer Wants to Pay Homage to Aguas Frescas –for Some Reason 🙄

Just when you thought marketers couldn’t get any more creative, a new partnership is here to bring us Mural, a “joint homage to the classic agua fresca that also pushes the boundaries of what a beer can be.”

Mural is a joint effort between New Belgium Brewing Company and Mexico-based artisanal beer makers Cervecería Primus and, in what seems to be a very serious description of their product, one learns that:

“In Mexico, agua fresca is everywhere. They’re usually found in street food markets and feature a blend of seasonal fruits. Our cerveza takes inspiration from agua frescas and features hibiscus, agave, watermelon, and lime for a fresh, vibrant sip.”

Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to have to pass on this promised vibrant sip. ¡Guácala!

Photo: @LeChancle

El Chingón IPA Is Coming Soon to your Nearby Bodega, Because Corporate America Loves ‘the Hispanics’

I never go to Dallas (nor do I see any reason to do that) so I had no idea they had an IPA over there called El Chingón. But now that Constellation Brands has acquired Four Corners, makers of said IPA, we’ll be seeing this thing everywhere across the USA –pretty much like those pesky Hispanics.

And it all makes sense. See? Even when non-Hispanics keep calling the cops on our people for speaking Spanish and our own clown-in-chief insists on calling Mexicans rapists and awful, awful people, corporate America still LOVES the Hispanics.

And there’s a reason for that. According to data shared by Constellation Brands, Hispanics make up more than 17 percent of beer drinkers in the U.S. and the number of Hispanic people entering legal drinking age over the next decade is expected to grow 3 percent to a total of 46 million.

So, no matter how much they hate us and want to deport our butts back-to-where-we-came-from, when it comes to spending our dinerito, my people are still very very chingones.

Via. CNN.com

This Beer Features Donald Trump Wearing a Mariachi Hat and a Swastika Belt Buckle — for some Reason

No, I don’t feel like buying/drinking this thing

People have got to stop doing this.

According to my sources (i.e. the World Wide Web) Mexican and U.S. brewers have gotten together to reinvent Donald Trump as a “gun-slinging mariachi” to promote Amigous, a beer supposed to “celebrate cross-border cooperation.” But the gun is only the beginning. From the little I could read, Trump’s trousers are held up with a swastika belt buckle, and the rear label of the beer informs the reader that the 71-year-old New Yorker belongs “in a mad house, not the White House.”

The “innovative” product comes on the heels of the Trump-inspired toilet paper and other crazy ideas out there.

I am not going to spend too much time on talking about this thing, because 1) I’m super busy and 2) It’s almost impossible to keep up with all the marketing nonsense around our current administration and the dark, sad hole we’ve all fallen into.

So… wake me up in 2024, will ya?

Via: Univision

Penélope Cruz to Peddle non-Alcoholic Beer — for Women, you Know?

Oh, how I miss the days when Penélope Cruz drank Coke and belched like the guys.

Alas, in this modern, politically-correct times we live, the gorgeous-but-married-mother-of -small-children wants us to drink… non-alcoholic beer, because she’s a lady, you know? and beer is, like, for the dudes.

The following is an ad apparently airing now on Polish television, though several reports say Karmi, the beer for ladies, is making its way to Spain — and beyond.

What a great time to be alive…. NOT.

Via: El Español

This Gringo Is so Mexican, He Drinks Victoria Beer

gregorioThere is nothing that annoys me more than Americans thinking they know Mexico and Mexican culture because they like to drink Corona beer.

Fortunately, there’s one gringo who knows there are alternatives, including Victoria beer, the only cerveza this blogger likes. See? No matter how much this guy sucks at everything “Mexican;” all he needs to do is drink a non-Corona beer (in this case a Victoria) to pass as a real Mexican among the dudes.

Here’s the latest spot for Victoria beer, featuring the hilarious El Corrido de Greg, with music by my cuates of Mixto Music.

¡Ajúa, pinches gringos!

Via: Victoria Beer on Facebook

Anheuser-Busch Debuts Bad ‘Mexican’ Beer with an Even Worse Commercial

jaliscopromo

Estrella Jalisco, a beer brand you’ve never heard of (and one you should probably never drink) has decided to make its U.S. debut by pitching its own idea of “mexicanidad,” namely turning a regular American neighborhood into an animated fiesta, complete with charros, mariachis and papel picado.

The spot is as bad as you could expect from a “Mexican” beer concocted by Anheuser-Busch InBev, purveyors of everything but “mexicanidad.”

Anyhow…

WATCH. CRINGE. DO NOT REPEAT

Dos Equis’ New ‘Most Interesting Man in the World’ is not really that Interesting

He'll make you a spinach fettuccini, because hispsters
‘The Most Interesting Man in the World’ will make you a spinach fettuccini with shiitake mushroom, because hipsters

After much teasing, Dos Equis finally unveiled its first full-fledged commercial featuring French actor Augustin Legrand, the brand’s new “Most Interesting Man in the World.”

And he’s actually not that interesting.

Unlike Jonathan Goldsmith, Dos Equis’ original — and devastatingly handsome — Most Interesting Man in the World, the new guy comes across more like a hipster than a seductive “real man” á la Goldsmith. Unlike his predecessor, who enjoyed sharing a good meal surrounded by several gorgeous women, the new will make you a “spinach fettuccini with a shiitake mushroom glaze.”

Per Dos Equis, the action in the new ads take place entirely in the present era, unlike the old ones that included footage of a younger version of the man, suggesting a bygone era. The new spots — and spokesperson —  are also an attempt to attract more so-called millennials to the brand, proving once again that millennials just ruin everything.

Via: Dos Equis

One has to be Pretty ‘Desperado’ to Drink this Thing

La Beer + Le Tequila = Le Guácala
Beer + Tequila = Le Guácala

The French might have some of the best wines in the world, but when it comes to packaged cocktails, they are not exactly Le top.

I found the French youth to be particularly fond of Desperados, a tequila, beer, lemon, cactus (yep) concoction that is for sale pretty much everywhere.

I love the French, especially because of this, so I won’t be on their case.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Dijon, France 2015

 

Mexican Brewery Celebrates ‘Day of the Dead’ with a Typo

DOA_IPA

I think it’s great that Cervecería Mexicana has decided to celebrate Day of the Dead (and not Halloween) with a special DOA IPA sold exclusively in the United States. But if they were going to give gringos a lesson about how to properly celebrate the scariest day of the year, they might as well have taught them -also- the importance of placing accents.

As everybody knows, we (i.e. The Mexicans) celebrate “día” de los muertos; not “dia.” At least when it comes to Spanish, typos really scare me.

Mexican Men Know How to Lure Women…. [into the Fridge]

Pétalos

Say what you will about Tecate, but the beer maker knows a thing or two about Mexican men and their tricky ways to get women do what they want (namely to get them cold beers from the fridge.)

I don’t know you, but I found the following spot truly amusing.*

 

*NOTE: For those enraged Latinas ready to start screaming and/or propose a boycott against Tecate or something, please contact the company directly or its ad agency in Mexico, not this blogger. Thank you for your cooperation.

Tecate Apologizes for Encouraging Men to Pee on Trees

After numerous complaints by anal law-abiding citizens who think public urination is not a really good thing, Tecate has decided to pull the above billboards.  See? Even if you don’t speak Spanish, the message is pretty clear: If you’re a man who drinks Tecate and thus have ‘coraje’ (balls, courage, etc.) then you should be able to relieve yourself anywhere you like; on trees, for example.

The Consumerist has the full scoop, including Tecate’s apology, which goes like this:

We have an internal process whereby every ad is reviewed for compliance with our local code for responsible commercial communication. As a part of that process, this ad concept was rejected by our US team but unfortunately, an error was made and the ad was mistakenly released and posted. We sincerely thank consumers for bringing this to our attention and have immediately removed the ad. We regret the error and are taking a look at our internal controls to ensure this does not happen again.

¡Voy! ¡Ni aguantan nada! [PUN intended]

Puerto Ricans Offended by Coor’s Light Ad. This Blogger Offended by Bad Beer

UPDATED: It didn’t take long. Coor’s Light late Thursday decided to pull the Emborícuate campaign. Uy ni aguantan nada!

As if New Yorkers didn’t have enough worries, with the Weinergate at its peak (no pun intended) and all, now we have to put up with yet another ridiculous controversy: Turns out many Puerto Ricans interviewed by a local TV station are pissed about a Coor’s Light ad featuring the copy “Emborícuate,” apparently because they say it sounds a lot like “Emborráchate” (Get Wasted)

I find it odd that this ad campaign, now in its third year, is drawing the ire of New Yorkers right now. Perhaps is the hot weather, or the fact that our city is rapidly becoming the world’s capital of sin. Who knows? In any case, this blogger -not a boricua herself- is more offended by watery beer than by any advertising copy.

Just one thing though: What’s with the line about “La celebración de la parada”? Are we back to the Weiner story? I am confused!