Mexico Urges UNESCO to Protect Its Food Before it Looks Like This

Not content with having Teotihuacán and Chichen Itzá among UNESCO’s protected cultural sites, Mexican officials are lobbying the organization to consider something even more worthy of recognition: Mexican cuisine.

Despite undergoing the country’s worst political and economic crisis in decades (and having organized crime virtually running the country,) Mexican cultural buffs, are urging U.N. officials to decide whether to add Mexico’s food to UNESCO’s list of cultural patrimony.

Such decision is of utmost importance, especially when one looks at the progress made in the Mexican culinary area by the likes of McDonald’s, Old El Paso and Chipotle.

So, please, U.N. officials: Show some respect to our tamales!

You Can’t Have Your Tits and Name Them Too

If you are remotely familiar with Spanish-language television, you might have noticed that scantily-clad muchachas are never in short supply, whether they are stars of a telenovela, hosts of family game show or simply just delivering the news.

But one thing is to show feminine attributes all day long on television and another is to call those attributes by their name. And that is why Telemundo has chosen to go with the image of a brassiere instead of the actual word to promote the upcoming premiere of Sin tetas no hay paraíso (Literally: Without Tits There is No Paradise.)

Reporting on the story for Multichannel News, this is what the network had to say about the name change:

“We think this compelling telenovela from Colombia conveys important messages of interest to our U.S. audiences,” a Telemundo spokesperson said via e-mail. “However, based on our network standards and our understanding of the expectation of our viewers, we have made certain adjustments including the treatment of the name.”

Which basically means: You cannot have your tetas and name them too!

Good Lord, Jean Paul Gaultier Takes Mexican Fashion Cue from Mel Gibson

Parisian haut couture has never been this fun.

Mixing images of mariachi hats, agave plants, palm trees and vaquero pants, Parisian designer Jean Paul Gaultier this week introduced the world to his spring-summer 2010 collection, totally inspired in the “sounds and sights” of Mexico.

Asked when he’s last visited Mexico, Gaultier told the press it was well over 30 years ago, but that it was Mel Gibson’s 2006 Mayan epic Apocalypto what put him into a tropical state of mind.

Oh, now I get it!

Landon Donovan Tries to Trick the Mexican Migra

Before you cringe -and call the Latino stereotype police, I’d like to tell you that the following ad -pitching Grupo Televisa’s Gana Gol lottery game- was created, written and filmed in Mexico… by Mexicans.

And no, I don’t think it’s offensive. [I actually find it funny, especially when Donovan calls the border agent “leeeeero”… ja, ja, ja.]

[https://youtu.be/A6zsw2rec6Q]

Schwarzenegger to Outsource Imprisonment of Mexicans… In Mexico

You can say anything about California’s governor but you cannot deny the guy’s gotta head full of brilliant ideas.

In his most recent political -and economic- potential breakthrough, the Governator is proposing to pay the Mexican government to house the estimated 20,000 undocumented immigrants that are incarcerated in California. Why, it’s simple!

“Think about it. We pay the Mexican government to build the prison in Mexico and then we have these undocumented immigrants be down there in prison. With their prison guards and all this, it’s half the cost to build and half the cost to operate the prison. We gain $1 billion right there that could go into higher education.”

Of course! Just imagine the world of possibilities: Mexican prisoners will get better food and hopefully better treatment (because they will be watched by their “own people”) while Californians will get a better access to higher education. This, in turn, will create better educated people, so hopefully in the future they will not screw up when picking their elected officials.

This is a win-win situation, people!

It’s NOT the Network. It’s la Fiesta Total!

I suppose my career counselor was right when he said advertising was not for me. Otherwise, how could I possibly explain my failure to conceive a creative piece like the one below? Showing mariachis and folkloric dancers to show your cellphone provider has coverage in Mexico??!

Shame on me.

Still, there are other creative pieces I like much better, at least in their use of the ubiquitous Mariachi, including French’s, Lucas and CNN Expansión. [Not to mention, of course, political campaigns like that of Miss Meg Whitman in California.]

Brilliant! P&G Will Teach Latinas How to Save Money While Still Buying Pricey Detergent

You might not know this but according to Buenhogar Magazine a very prestigious institution, 31 percent of Hispanics have more expenses than income every month, (perhaps because we just keep buying Buenhogar every month?), which is, like, really bad because it’s hard to balance your checkbook when that happens.

But worry no more: Procter & Gamble’s Tide brand has teamed up with Mexican journalist María Antonieta Collins (pictured) to impart a series of seminars to teach Latinas how to get the most value for our money “by better managing our everyday finances,” [and still plunking down upwards of $7.99 for a heavily-advertised detergent, I suppose.]

“Based on my experience […] I understand firsthand the importance of proper budget management and learning to live within our means, and I am thrilled to be working with Tide to share this knowledge with Hispanic women across the country,” Collins told whoever wrote the press release.

So now you know. Stop whining about those pricey detergents, and be sure to mark down your calendars. Open to the public, the seminars will be taking place starting January through June in several “Hispanic dense” cities including, of course, Miami, New York, Dallas and Los Angeles.

Palestinian Entrepreneur Finds ‘Neat’ Way to Lure Hispanic Customers to Service Station

Question: How would you lure more Mexican customers to your Memphis-area gas station?

Answer: Offer additional services such as check cashing and money remittances to Mexico… and then use the Pemex brand -and logo- to give the business a truly local feel.

That is exactly what Haitham Alyousef, a Palestinian immigrant in Memphis, did when he incorporated Pemex Inc., a service station offering everything, from long distance calls to money remittances and “Hispanic foods.” According to the local press:

“Alyousef and his business partners enjoy reminders of home, and believe Mexican immigrants feel the same way.”

Petróleos Mexicanos (Pemex) is said to be considering a lawsuit, but they should just relax. Asked by a local reporter about why he stole the Pemex logo, image and name, Alyousef simply replied:

“I thought it was kind of neat.”

Alcohol Good. Diets Bad. Spanish Advertising Rocks!

I always knew my Madre Patria one day would come to my rescue.

Spanish authorities are imposing an advertising ban on certain beauty products and services before 10 p.m., mostly because there a lot of people over there obsessed with losing weight at all cost, developing eating disorders and resorting to all types of methods of slimming, like not eating or vomiting.

According to Advertising Age:

Ads for diet products, some beauty treatments and plastic surgery are now officially considered more dangerous for young people than commercials for alcohol, which can be advertised from 9 p.m.

Let’s also not forget that it was also Spain which decided in 2007 that the mannequins in stores like Zara or Mango would not have proportions smaller than a U.S. size 6. And in 2006, Madrid was the first city to ban ultra-thin models from its fashion week runways.

So, thanks Spain! I’m going to forget all about the nip and the tuck and just focus on the  sip, sip, sip!

And This is How Mexicans Will be Celebrating the Centennial of Our Revolution. ¡Ajúa!

Meet Fernanda and Isabel Calles Carranza, great-granddaughters of revolutionary leaders, who are celebrating the centennial of the Mexican Revolution by -what else?- posing nude for Playboy.

According to EFE, the twenty-something sisters were “convinced” by the magazine’s publishers to appear in the February edition of Playboy México, which has confirmed that:

Fernanda and Isabel Calles Carranza “will show off their beauty in a lovely pictorial to kick off the 2010 festivities.”

Oh, yeah! that’s lovely… not to mention über-revolutionary!

Photo: EFE

Hat tip, again, to my un-paid, eagle-eyed Mexico correspondent Keith Dannemiller.

UPDATE: Some lady named Alejandra Elías Calles has come forward to sour the party for everybody (particularly this blogger) claiming these damiselas are nothing but a scam. I will, of course, keep you posted, because, well, I have nothing better to do.

Don’t Know Latin America’s Major Capitals? No Worries: AT&T Will be There for You

I watched this commercial for the first time Sunday night (during the NBC broadcast of the Golden Globe Awards) and then it hit me: technology will always be there for us, no matter how challenged, ignorant or forgetful we become as a result of, well, all these technological advances.

Don’t know the capital of a major Latin American country? No worries! Your cellphone company will make sure to get you out of a jam.

Latino Presidential Hopeful Scheduled to Appear on Gringo Telenovela

Antonio Villaraigosa, the guy Rush Limbaugh mistook for a “shoeshine guy,” has found an innovative way to make himself relevant in these days and times: he will make a special appearance on All My Children, the legendary ABC soap opera, now in its 10,290,000 episode.

According to The Huffington Post:

Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa and City Council President Eric Garcetti will both shoot episodes at the show’s new production studio near downtown Los Angeles this month. The episode featuring Villaraigosa is scheduled to air Feb. 17.

No word yet on how the Mayor plans to combine his presidential aspirations with the absorbing world of telenovelas and the unbridled passion he has shown to feel for Hispanic newscasters.

California Lures Mexicans to Activities Other Than Fruit Picking

Because you can never get enough Mexicans in California, the state’s Travel and Tourism Commission has launched an all-Spanish-language Web site to “help lure more Mexicans to The Golden State.”

Visita California informs my people about the many wonderful things we can expect to do in the Golden State, including sun-bathing, surfing, golfing and -of course- rafting.

According to Caroline Beteta, CTTC president & CEO and chair of the U.S. Travel Association:

“This new Spanish-language Web site is part of one of the ways we hope to make planning a California dream vacation easier and more compelling to this important market.”

I suppose Ms. Beteta is talking about the “other” important Mexican market; and not the one charged with cleaning their hotel rooms and picking their fruit…

I wonder.

Mel Gibson Goes to Mexico. Veracruz Prison Brouhaha Ensues

We were all too distracted -and shocked- at the events unfolding this week in Haiti, but I thought you might want to know that your favorite Australian filmmaker is pissing up a lot of people in Veracruz, Mexico.

As it turns out, Mr. Gibson had an entire prison emptied so he could start filming some kind of movie, never mind the families of the inmates now have to travel an additional 50 kilometers to pay a visit.

And, as it happens so very often in my beloved country, the authorities gave Mr. Gibson carte blanche to do whatever he pleased. Yet, the governor of Veracruz, Fidel Herrera, insisted this week in saying:

“Inmates were cleared from a prison last week in Mexico’s Veracruz state for security reasons and not to allow U.S. actor Mel Gibson to begin shooting.”

Yeah, right!

Hat tip: Keith Dannemiller