I get it, “cola” is a type of carbonated soft drink, but if you promise me a bigger butt at a moment when I’m trying to shed my COVID weight, well, just move on. Nobody here needs a bigger cola.
Pizza Hut Australia Wants you to Put Guacamole on your Pizza
Pizza Hut Australia tweeted the above image to its followers asking what they’d prefer on their pizza: “avocado dip” (whatever that means) or -I assume- a regular topping. I’m too busy to elaborate right now, but it is my opinion that multinationals should just leave aguacates alone.
… oh and don’t get me started on the copy.
via: Pizza Hut Australia
This Is the Best Ad for English Lessons you’ll ever Find
Marketing and advertising executives would be well advised to use the advertising tactics of Mr. Miguel Fong, some dude I don’t know but who teaches English in Mexico.
If you are bilingual, you will now have appreciated the power of the above ad. But here’s a quick translation for my beloved monolingual followers:
He responds to the name “Unforgettable”
If you cannot read this name, it is because its in English. Contact me so you can learn!
Nice job Mr. Fong, I wish other language institutions would follow your lead.
Yalitza Aparicio Gets ‘White Washed’ for Lenovo Commercial –and I Can’t Even
As of this writing, this blogger was currently busy editing (and desperately in search of a bottle of anxiety pills,) but I wanted you to know that this is happening and that I’m now speechless, I am without speech.
Americans Horrified to Learn about their ‘Mexican DNA’ in Hilarious Aeroméxico Campaign 😂
Aeroméxico is offering Americans hefty discounts to travel to Mexico. How hefty? Well, this depends –says Aeroméxico– on said Americans’ percentage of “Mexican heritage,” whatever this means.
The problem? Judging from this new campaign (executed by Ogilvy), not all of these die-hard Americans seem to be thrilled to learn they are, well, part Mexican –even if this means they can fly to Mexicou on the cheap.
Oh, the horror!
El oh el 😂 pic.twitter.com/I96LaT3gO7
— ERV (@ervcas) 17 de enero de 2019
WATCH. ENJOY. REPEAT
This Brazilian University Wants you to Master in… WHAT?
I don’t know much about Univeritas or it’s academic curriculum, but judging from its outdoor advertising, they’re not kidding when they say they’re going to transform people’s life.
Kate Spade Wants to Make Mariachis Great Again!
Mexican immigrants are not precisely popular these days –and I’m pretty sure we’ll all get deported real soon. But local mariachis are making their way to the world of high fashion, thanks in part to Kate Spade New York.
The brand has tapped the all-female mariachi band Flor de Toloache to tout its “timeless — and timely — collection,” which is full of “cute cultural references” and is now available on Kate Spade’s Website.*
WATCH as the all-female band gets on the [FAILING] New York City subway while model Fernanda Ly walks in sporting a “lace-trimmed flouncy dresses” and a handbag that features a tiny burrito or something weird like that.
*Alas, the fabulous black charro suits are not part of the collection’s offering.
Hat tip: @begona_lozano
Ever Wanted to Drive Like an Inca from Baja? Go Get Your ‘Ethnic-Style’ Wheel Cover Today!
From the online retailer that brought us the Mexican Deluxe Yoga Mat, the Hispanic Flag and — of course — the DIY Tacos al pastor, now comes the Baja Inca Blanket Steering Wheel Cover Plush Poncho , an “ethnic, fun, fashionable” wheel cover for your pimped up lowrider!
Because everybody knows the Incas from Baja California are one colorful driving bunch, right?
Hat tip: @SaraChicaD
Two Apparently Nice Ladies Want you to Cover Your Pet’s A-Hole with a Talking Donald Trump
Speaking of pussy assholes, a duo of advertising ladies are launching the Trump Hole Covers, some sort of weird device to cover your pet’s a-hole with a talking Donald Trump — because the world has definitely gone mad.
Behind this contraption (no pun intended) are Martha Ibarrondo and Evelyn Monroe Neill, two advertising ladies who have had it with with Donald Trump — pretty much like everyone else.
Per their very “intriguing” PR pitch:
“We’re amazed, disgusted, amused and inspired by the 2016 presidential election. We ask you to join in and share, share, share. Help us make #trumpholecover and #trumpcatasstrophy a phenom because really, if anyone ever deserved this place in history, it’s Donald Trump.”
I do not have a pet, but even if I did I’m not sure I would want to cover it’s a-hole with anything (much less with a talking Donald Trump). But apparently there’s something good in all this: According to Ibarrondo and Monroe Neill, your Trump hole cover purchase will support non-profit organizations that serve women and immigrants.
Not convinced yet? How about just doing it for the sarape -and sombrero-clad- pussy?
Going to Vegas? Look out for a Trio of Latina Swindlers
It took me a while to realize this was not an ad touting the latest Latina-escort service, but a regular daytime TV commercial to entice you to Visit Las Vegas.
Watch as a trio of apparently-innocent señoritas set out to trick a bunch of gringos into believing that they just arrived and it’s their first time in Vegas.
Psssst: It’s NOT!
Hat tip: Marco Lopez
Mucus Loves Taco Tuesday; Vows to Wear Sombrero to Go out
I am not really a fan of mucus or mucus-related marketing, but this disgusting creature has earned a spot on this venerable blog, mostly because of his apparent love of tacos.
Watch mucus as he gets ready for Taco Tuesday only to be put down by some white guy armed with 12-hour Mucinex.
It ain’t happening, moco, so you’d better keep your sombrero for some other time. Cinco de mayo, perhaps?
Indigenous Community in Oaxaca Responds to Coca-Cola: ‘We Didn’t Use to Have Diabetes’
On the heels of Coca-Cola pulling its controversial ad featuring a group of white Mexican kids bringing hope — and sugary drinks — to an indigenous community in Oaxaca, a group of mixe indians from the town of Totontepec came on to share their own message.
Using the same footage of the now infamous Coca-Cola spot, the mixes take the stage to share stories about their community’s lack of water and an alarming increase in diabetes levels, brought about by — what else? — sugary drinks like Coca-Cola. Among other things, their message (in mixe language featuring Spanish subtitles) includes the following statement by one local student:
“Fifty years ago, cases of diabetes type 2 in our indian communities were rare; now they begin to be an epidemic. In order to remain united, we must preserve our dignity, our health and our culture. In Oaxaca, we drink tejare, tea and clean water.”
News of the spot was first reported by SinEmbargo.com.mx in Mexico. Here’s the video, in mixe language with subtitles in Spanish. Stay tuned as I will be translating the whole message very soon. I just need to get this out for the sake of giving the mixes the space they deserve.
Wash Away Latino Stereotypes Using Ketchup and Tide Pods
In an unusual (mostly bizarre) new marketing effort, Procter & Gamble has partnered with the National Council of La Raza “to celebrate the contributions of Latinos and fight stereotypes.”
And how do you fight stereotypes? Easy! Just follow these simple steps:
- Take bottle of ketchup
- Use said ketchup to jot down the offending stereotype on a T-shirt
- Throw said T-shirt with offending stereotype in washing machine
- Use Tide pods
- Repeat if there are more offended Latinos in household
Voilá!… adiós mojados, wetbacks, beaners and balseros!
WATCH. CRINGE. DO NOT REPEAT.
TWA Once Offered ‘Foreign Accent’ Flights; Alas, not ‘Hispanic’
“All in all, TWA’s new ‘Foreign Accent’ flights bring you […] foreign music. Foreign magazines and newspapers. Foreign touches all around.”
Unfortunately, none of this included us, *the* Hispanics, so this blog won’t be shedding any more ink here.
Sombrero (hat) tip: Ricardo Trejo
Are you Ready for Some Latino-Inspired Online Shopping?
Awwww, the Internet is full of wonderful things, isn’t it?
Take the growing crop of Latino-inspired products you can now buy online, promising you to hold onto our Hispanicness by acquiring accessories, clothing, nutrition supplements and –yes– hats, all inspired by Latinos or Hispanic people like -ahem, ahem- you and me.
One of such sites is Hispanic.com, which I only discovered today (apologies) and which peddles all kinds of awesome stuff, including a Latino-inspired wallet, a culturally-relevant stuffed armadillo or — better — a Que pasa vato [SIC] baby bib hereby featured on an adorable, albeti non-Latino-looking toddler.
However, if generic “Hispanic stuff” is not for you because you happen to belong to a special type of Hispanic (i.e. you are Cuban), we have something awesome just for you: The Cuban Food Market, where you can find some jewels from the island-to-become-Miami-in-no-time®, including a Le Cuban Salt & Pepper shaker or the Mama Ines [SIC] fridge magnet (below).
All I can say is one Very Latino Thing: ¡Ay, Dios mío!