This Guy Wanted to Build a Wall in his Restaurant Because Hispanics Don’t Tip 😂

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“Give MI a break,” says Wayte.

Poor Steve Wayte.

The owner of a weirdly named sushi restaurant in California is under fire after making a joke that some of my people (i.e. Fast & Furious Hispanics) DID. NOT. FIND. FUNNY.

The joke? Upon realizing that Hispanics tend to not leave tips in his restaurant, Wayte wrote the following on his Facebook page:

As expected, the Fury of Twitter descended on the poor guy, who had to apologize like 100 times, first on social media and then on national television, saying he did not mean any harm.

But none of this mattered, of course, because last time I checked, a local politician named Henry Perea was still pretty pissed and calling for a boycott of — are you ready? — Roll One For Mi.

Come on, people. Give Steve a break! Today for MI, tomorrow for USTEDES.

Via: Fresno Bee

Mexicans in this Disney-Pixar Trailer Sound a lot like Spaniards

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With much fanfare, Disney-Pixar on Wednesday released the first teaser trailer of Coco, an upcoming animated film about “a 12-year-old aspiring Mexican musician, who embarks on a magical trip in the Land of the Dead.”

While many of the voices in the English-language movie will be done by Mexicans or Mexican American actors (including Gael García Bernal, Anthony Gonzalez and Benjamin Bratt) I couldn’t help but cringe at this other “Spanish” version I found on the Web, one apparently hailing from Spain, which makes all these Mexicans sound a lot like coming out of a Marisol movie.

Coco will hit theaters on November 22, 2017 and you’ll be well advised to watch the English-language trailer in this link and NOT the one below.

Penélope Cruz to Peddle non-Alcoholic Beer — for Women, you Know?

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Oh, how I miss the days when Penélope Cruz drank Coke and belched like the guys.

Alas, in this modern, politically-correct times we live, the gorgeous-but-married-mother-of -small-children wants us to drink… non-alcoholic beer, because she’s a lady, you know? and beer is, like, for the dudes.

The following is an ad apparently airing now on Polish television, though several reports say Karmi, the beer for ladies, is making its way to Spain — and beyond.

What a great time to be alive…. NOT.

Via: El Español

Mexicans Are Freaking out about ‘Mexico Is the Shit’ Fashion

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It was bound to happen.

A fashion idea born in Mexico, and crafted by Mexican designer Anuar Layon was meant to show the world (or, more specifically the obtuse Trump administration) that Mexico is… well, the shit (i.e. bien chingón.)

But of course, when you launch an English-language slogan — and movement — in Mexico, you cannot seriously expect everyone to understand exactly what you mean.

See? Not everybody is a European-educated fashion designer down there; so there are some Mexicans who are seriously pissed, thinking that being the shit is something like awful. Take this poor soul who became the butt of the joke Monday night after tweeting the following photo “denouncing” racism at some Mexico City hotel.

So, what the hell is Mexico is the Shit anyhow?

In the words of Layón himself:

It is a tribute to all those mexicans around the world that are shifting global culture with their beautiful hearts and brilliant minds; it’s a way to show that we are many and we are together; that we are raising the standards, reminding the world that our voice matters. “Mexico is the shit” is a community, a support system and a movement inspiring love, respect and trust!

Sure, and also a way for these guys to sell shirts & jackets, which I’m sure cost more than a few bucks. Still, whether you decide to wear one of these things — or not — just chill. Mexico IS the Shit.

This Gringo Is so Mexican, He Drinks Victoria Beer

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gregorioThere is nothing that annoys me more than Americans thinking they know Mexico and Mexican culture because they like to drink Corona beer.

Fortunately, there’s one gringo who knows there are alternatives, including Victoria beer, the only cerveza this blogger likes. See? No matter how much this guy sucks at everything “Mexican;” all he needs to do is drink a non-Corona beer (in this case a Victoria) to pass as a real Mexican among the dudes.

Here’s the latest spot for Victoria beer, featuring the hilarious El Corrido de Greg, with music by my cuates of Mixto Music.

¡Ajúa, pinches gringos!

Via: Victoria Beer on Facebook

Stephen Colbert Calls Mexico about Paying for Trump’s Huge, Beautiful Border Wall

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Stephen Colbert on Friday compiled a team of experts — including an architect, an interior designer and a “concrete guy” — to come up with some rough estimates for Trump’s “big, strong, powerful, yuuuuge” wall.*

After concluding that the wall would have to be at least 100 feet tall, require at least 12,000 skilled laborers and result in roughly 4,800 casualties, Colbert put in a call to the Mexican consulate to see if Mexicans would foot the bill.

Just WATCH:

*Reminder: Trump has about 3 years and 11 months to complete construction if he wants to keep his campaign promise.

 

Mexican Chef Creates $25,000 Taco, Because Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

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How much would you pay for shrimp, caviar, truffle and 24 carat gold flakes stuffed in a corn tortilla?

How about $25,000?

Well, that’s the price of the world’s most expensive taco, a creation of Mexican chef Juan Licerio Alcalá and one no one has ordered — yet.

According to my super secret sources (i.e. Yahoo News,) Licerio, the chef at the ultra luxurious Grand Velas Los Cabos Resort in Baja California, created this thing because he wanted to “think outside the box.”

“People are excited and a little surprised about how you can eat a taco for $25,000 ($497,000 pesos) when you can find one on the street for 10 pesos,” he said.

Well, as a non-wealthy, non-luxurious, taco-loving real Mexican, the explanation is simple: Licerio – and the hotel where he works – cater to a mostly NON-Mexican crowd, the same one that would pay top dollars for a Deluxe Mexican Yoga Mat or a $1,300 Swarovski-embellished Taco Purse. Not my people. I’m sure…

[FACE PALM]

Hat tip: @tropicarlitos

Shazam Joins Cinco de Mayo Bash, Because Tequila!

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¡Ándale, ándale! ¡Arriba, arriba!
¡Ándale, ándale! ¡Arriba, arriba!

It’s too early to start talking about Cinco de Mayo, right?

WRONG!

Shazam, the app that lets you identify and discover songs from a mobile device, is already working on a super duper plan to join the Cinco de Mayou fiesta!

The company said on Monday that it has partnered with Beam Suntory — owners of Sauza and Hornitos tequila — to enter the realm of Augmented Reality (AR) just in time for this blogger’s most despised favorite holiday.

And how does this partnership will work? Well, I’m glad you asked: Using some new technology, users will be able to scan codes from, say, a bottle of tequila to experience all kinds of augmented reality “Mexican” fun and stuff, including “3D animations, product visualizations, mini-games and 360-degree videos. Guac-a-Mole, anyone?

Here’s how the company explained this thing:

“This breakthrough technology offers an accessible, immersive platform with which to engage in a rewarded gamification experience at the point of purchase leading up to Cinco de Mayo. Sauza Tequila and Hornitos Premium Tequila should effectively break through the Cinco de Mayo advertising clutter thanks to this exciting partnership,” said Michelle Cater, Beam Suntory’s senior director of commercial marketing, apparently with a straight face.

¡Ajúa!

Via: CNET en Español

Bride Makes Wedding Gown out of Taco Bell Burrito Wrappers, Because some People Want me Dead

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These "Burritos" are in Love
Burritos in Love

Some people want to watch the world burn — and/or see this blogger jump from the highest building in Manhatitlán.

Here’s the scoop: Bride-to-be Diane Nguyen posted the above photo on her Instagram feed showing a wedding gown made out of … Taco Bell burrito wrappers (hopefully unused.)

And no, apparently she isn’t that crazy; she’s just vying to win a Taco Bell contest where fans of the eatery submit photos or brief videos showing why they should win a free wedding at the Taco Bell Cantina in Las Vegas. (Oh, OK I take that back. She is crazy.)

You guys know how I feel about Taco Bell, but I confess this bride’s writing was actually not as bad as her taste in food:

“Our love for each other is as cheesy as a quesadilla,” she wrote. “We’re nachos getting married, it’s going to be a Las Vegas tacover. Lettuce celebrate our love at the Taco Bell Chapel in Vegas, cuz we are ready to guac and roll.”

Via: CNET en Español

Watch as Vicente Fox Transitions from Being a Local Embarrassment to an International One

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imageI have said this, like a million times before: The only thing worse than our rich, dumb, infantile U.S. president is… Mexico’s rich, dumb, infantile former president.

Vicente Fox, who has jumped to gringo fame of late for his in-your-face defiance of Donald Trump, is (sadly) among the guests of honor of Conan O’Brien’s upcoming Mexico episode.

I will be watching this thing tonight, of course (mostly for Conan *and* Mexico), but I’d like to extend a formal apology in advance to my American friends for this guy, who went from being a local embarrassment to an international one…

Watch as Vicente Fox hands Conan O’Brien a very special pair No Fucking Wall Boots. Click on the photo below to watch video.

boots

 

Toys R Us Portugal Features Border Wall, other ‘Typically Mexican’ Fun Toys and Stuff!

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I couldn’t make this shit up even if I tried…

According to archfamous Mexican professional footballer Miguel Layún, Toys R Us Portugal has a dedicated Mexico section, where kids can do so many fun things, including getting acquainted with Trump’s Border Wall.

The above photo was taken by Layún, who tweeted (in Spanish): “It is so sad that @ToysRUS in Gaia features this type of decoration; we decided to leave upon seeing this joke.”

I only wonder if they sell fun family board games like The Illegal Game and the like…

SIGH…

Via: Miguel Layún/Twitter

Conan Goes to Mexico, Handles Street Tacos Like a Boss

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conantacos

You might not be aware of this, but Conan O’Brien is in Mexico City, thus having much better food — and fun — than the rest of us.

This week, as part of his ongoing Mexico City adventure, the famed TV presenter was spotted sharing a few street tacos with none other than Jorge Ramos, the Univision anchor who managed to pissed off Trump way before the rest of the “evil, flailing media” did.

Anyhow, Conan Without Borders: Made In Mexico premieres Wednesday, March 1st on TBS and this blogger cannot wait.

Via: Milenio

Texans Want to Make Tacos the National Food of Texas. I’m Totally Cool with that, But…

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tacostexas

A new change.org petition wants Texans to embrace the taco as a new official state symbol, because — as everybody knows — the taco is a waaaay more diverse dish than chili, the state dish of Texas since 1977. (Think about it: You can actually put chili in a tortilla and… call it a taco!)

So, yes, I’m 100 percent behind these folks’ claims about the wonderfulness of tacos (how could I not be?) but before I sign this petition, I just have a quick question:

When are we (the Mexicans) expected to get the state back?**

Via: Dallas Morning News 

Photo: Tacos of Texas/Facebook

** Thank you in advance for your prompt response