Category: Stupid propositions

Mexico Creates ‘Tequila Cloud’ to Attract German Tourists. Yep.

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This cloud rains tequila, so that more Germans can visit Mexico (or something)

I’m way too busy this week with so-called “real work,” but I just needed to let everybody know that the Mexican government has launched a new tourism campaign that involves a cloud that rains not water but … tequila.

Sí, señor. The campaign — crafted by Lapiz and first demonstrated at a special art exhibit in Berlin — used “ultrasonic humidifiers to vibrate tequila at a frequency that actually turned it into visible mist.” This mist is then condensed into liquid form, which falls as raindrops and basically means you can get your caballito ready, put it under the cloud and drink like there is no mañana. ¡Prost!

The reason behind all this, says the Mexican government, is simple: To tempt rain-soaked Germans to visit sunny Mexico in the dead of winter.

Go figure.

Via: LeoBurnett

No, Twitter, I Don’t Think the ‘Enchilada Bake’ Is a Good Idea

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I cannot unsee this thing!
Someone really wants me to shut down my Twitter account.

For reasons I have yet to understand, my “tailor-made,” “just-for-me” sponsored posts on Twitter have become an endless stream of disgusting “Mexican” concoctions. The latest comes courtesy of SmartMade, a company that prides itself on selling “delicious and nutritional frozen meals inspired by the quality ingredients and smart cooking techniques you use at home.”

I don’t know about you, but there is nothing smart in the so-called Bake Enchilada, a “meal” made of a “soft corn tortilla topped with black beans, roasted corn, red peppers and tomatoes lightly tossed in an enchilada sauce and topped with Monterey jack cheese.”

Oh, and don’t get me started on the Mexican style pulled pork…

So, there’s that, Twitter, not only I will not be clicking on that thing. I think an apology might be in order.

USA vs. Mexico: Who Is Sending their ‘Best’ elsewhere?

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Spring breakers chant ‘Build the Wall’ in Mexico

So much for the Mexican “journalist” who stole Tom Brady’s jersey, got caught and embarrassed an entire nation (this blogger included.)

I would like to turn our attention to this group of young Americans who went to Cancún, got drunk and yelled Build-The-Wall!, Build the Wall! repeatedly… while in — well — Mexico.*

OK, I get your rage, but before you go and vow to kill them all, I’d like for all of us to take a moment and realize that both — Mexico and the U.S. — have our share of morons, starting with the ones leading our respective nations, so really, can anyone blame us for being so obtuse?

I get the rage about the spring breakers, really, but before you go all crazy about them, go read this; then remember the 43 of Ayotzinapa; the blatant violations of human rights in Mexico and the dozens of filthy rich politicians who have vanished in thin air…. Then take a deep breath and maybe you’ll understand. We are all fucked, no matter which side of the border we live in.

Shame on us, really. All of us.

*OK, this happened in Cancún, which is arguably not Mexico anymore, but still…  

Via: SFGate.com

Mexicans in this Disney-Pixar Trailer Sound a lot like Spaniards

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With much fanfare, Disney-Pixar on Wednesday released the first teaser trailer of Coco, an upcoming animated film about “a 12-year-old aspiring Mexican musician, who embarks on a magical trip in the Land of the Dead.”

While many of the voices in the English-language movie will be done by Mexicans or Mexican American actors (including Gael García Bernal, Anthony Gonzalez and Benjamin Bratt) I couldn’t help but cringe at this other “Spanish” version I found on the Web, one apparently hailing from Spain, which makes all these Mexicans sound a lot like coming out of a Marisol movie.

Coco will hit theaters on November 22, 2017 and you’ll be well advised to watch the English-language trailer in this link and NOT the one below.

Penélope Cruz to Peddle non-Alcoholic Beer — for Women, you Know?

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Oh, how I miss the days when Penélope Cruz drank Coke and belched like the guys.

Alas, in this modern, politically-correct times we live, the gorgeous-but-married-mother-of -small-children wants us to drink… non-alcoholic beer, because she’s a lady, you know? and beer is, like, for the dudes.

The following is an ad apparently airing now on Polish television, though several reports say Karmi, the beer for ladies, is making its way to Spain — and beyond.

What a great time to be alive…. NOT.

Via: El Español

Mexicans Are Freaking out about ‘Mexico Is the Shit’ Fashion

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It was bound to happen.

A fashion idea born in Mexico, and crafted by Mexican designer Anuar Layon was meant to show the world (or, more specifically the obtuse Trump administration) that Mexico is… well, the shit (i.e. bien chingón.)

But of course, when you launch an English-language slogan — and movement — in Mexico, you cannot seriously expect everyone to understand exactly what you mean.

See? Not everybody is a European-educated fashion designer down there; so there are some Mexicans who are seriously pissed, thinking that being the shit is something like awful. Take this poor soul who became the butt of the joke Monday night after tweeting the following photo “denouncing” racism at some Mexico City hotel.

So, what the hell is Mexico is the Shit anyhow?

In the words of Layón himself:

It is a tribute to all those mexicans around the world that are shifting global culture with their beautiful hearts and brilliant minds; it’s a way to show that we are many and we are together; that we are raising the standards, reminding the world that our voice matters. “Mexico is the shit” is a community, a support system and a movement inspiring love, respect and trust!

Sure, and also a way for these guys to sell shirts & jackets, which I’m sure cost more than a few bucks. Still, whether you decide to wear one of these things — or not — just chill. Mexico IS the Shit.

Stephen Colbert Calls Mexico about Paying for Trump’s Huge, Beautiful Border Wall

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Stephen Colbert on Friday compiled a team of experts — including an architect, an interior designer and a “concrete guy” — to come up with some rough estimates for Trump’s “big, strong, powerful, yuuuuge” wall.*

After concluding that the wall would have to be at least 100 feet tall, require at least 12,000 skilled laborers and result in roughly 4,800 casualties, Colbert put in a call to the Mexican consulate to see if Mexicans would foot the bill.

Just WATCH:

*Reminder: Trump has about 3 years and 11 months to complete construction if he wants to keep his campaign promise.

 

Mexican Chef Creates $25,000 Taco, Because Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

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How much would you pay for shrimp, caviar, truffle and 24 carat gold flakes stuffed in a corn tortilla?

How about $25,000?

Well, that’s the price of the world’s most expensive taco, a creation of Mexican chef Juan Licerio Alcalá and one no one has ordered — yet.

According to my super secret sources (i.e. Yahoo News,) Licerio, the chef at the ultra luxurious Grand Velas Los Cabos Resort in Baja California, created this thing because he wanted to “think outside the box.”

“People are excited and a little surprised about how you can eat a taco for $25,000 ($497,000 pesos) when you can find one on the street for 10 pesos,” he said.

Well, as a non-wealthy, non-luxurious, taco-loving real Mexican, the explanation is simple: Licerio – and the hotel where he works – cater to a mostly NON-Mexican crowd, the same one that would pay top dollars for a Deluxe Mexican Yoga Mat or a $1,300 Swarovski-embellished Taco Purse. Not my people. I’m sure…

[FACE PALM]

Hat tip: @tropicarlitos

Shazam Joins Cinco de Mayo Bash, Because Tequila!

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¡Ándale, ándale! ¡Arriba, arriba!
¡Ándale, ándale! ¡Arriba, arriba!

It’s too early to start talking about Cinco de Mayo, right?

WRONG!

Shazam, the app that lets you identify and discover songs from a mobile device, is already working on a super duper plan to join the Cinco de Mayou fiesta!

The company said on Monday that it has partnered with Beam Suntory — owners of Sauza and Hornitos tequila — to enter the realm of Augmented Reality (AR) just in time for this blogger’s most despised favorite holiday.

And how does this partnership will work? Well, I’m glad you asked: Using some new technology, users will be able to scan codes from, say, a bottle of tequila to experience all kinds of augmented reality “Mexican” fun and stuff, including “3D animations, product visualizations, mini-games and 360-degree videos. Guac-a-Mole, anyone?

Here’s how the company explained this thing:

“This breakthrough technology offers an accessible, immersive platform with which to engage in a rewarded gamification experience at the point of purchase leading up to Cinco de Mayo. Sauza Tequila and Hornitos Premium Tequila should effectively break through the Cinco de Mayo advertising clutter thanks to this exciting partnership,” said Michelle Cater, Beam Suntory’s senior director of commercial marketing, apparently with a straight face.

¡Ajúa!

Via: CNET en Español

Bride Makes Wedding Gown out of Taco Bell Burrito Wrappers, Because some People Want me Dead

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These "Burritos" are in Love
Burritos in Love

Some people want to watch the world burn — and/or see this blogger jump from the highest building in Manhatitlán.

Here’s the scoop: Bride-to-be Diane Nguyen posted the above photo on her Instagram feed showing a wedding gown made out of … Taco Bell burrito wrappers (hopefully unused.)

And no, apparently she isn’t that crazy; she’s just vying to win a Taco Bell contest where fans of the eatery submit photos or brief videos showing why they should win a free wedding at the Taco Bell Cantina in Las Vegas. (Oh, OK I take that back. She is crazy.)

You guys know how I feel about Taco Bell, but I confess this bride’s writing was actually not as bad as her taste in food:

“Our love for each other is as cheesy as a quesadilla,” she wrote. “We’re nachos getting married, it’s going to be a Las Vegas tacover. Lettuce celebrate our love at the Taco Bell Chapel in Vegas, cuz we are ready to guac and roll.”

Via: CNET en Español

Toys R Us Portugal Features Border Wall, other ‘Typically Mexican’ Fun Toys and Stuff!

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I couldn’t make this shit up even if I tried…

According to archfamous Mexican professional footballer Miguel Layún, Toys R Us Portugal has a dedicated Mexico section, where kids can do so many fun things, including getting acquainted with Trump’s Border Wall.

The above photo was taken by Layún, who tweeted (in Spanish): “It is so sad that @ToysRUS in Gaia features this type of decoration; we decided to leave upon seeing this joke.”

I only wonder if they sell fun family board games like The Illegal Game and the like…

SIGH…

Via: Miguel Layún/Twitter

Texans Want to Make Tacos the National Food of Texas. I’m Totally Cool with that, But…

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tacostexas

A new change.org petition wants Texans to embrace the taco as a new official state symbol, because — as everybody knows — the taco is a waaaay more diverse dish than chili, the state dish of Texas since 1977. (Think about it: You can actually put chili in a tortilla and… call it a taco!)

So, yes, I’m 100 percent behind these folks’ claims about the wonderfulness of tacos (how could I not be?) but before I sign this petition, I just have a quick question:

When are we (the Mexicans) expected to get the state back?**

Via: Dallas Morning News 

Photo: Tacos of Texas/Facebook

** Thank you in advance for your prompt response

Sorry, Folks, the $40 Burrito Yoga Bag Is Sold Out, but…

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yogaburrito

Fear not: I’m pretty sure the folks over at Brogamats are working on it.

In the meantime, you can always use your tortilla towel  or — of course — a Deluxe Mexican Yoga Blanket as an OK substitute to wrap your existing yoga mat.

PLUS… Last time I checked, the $1,300 taco bag was still available, so you can still enjoy a tortilla-filled life until the burrito yoga bag is in stock again.

Hat tip: Begoña Lozano

Florida Woman Sues Mexican Restaurant After Falling off a Fake Donkey, Because Florida

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burro

What happens when Americans go to a Mexican restaurant in… America? They climb on fake donkey; attempt to take picture; fall off said donkey; file lawsuit.

According to local media, Kimberly Bonn was dining at the El Jalisco restaurant in Tallahassee when she attempted to climb atop a built-to-scale burro statue to pose for a picture. But as she attempted to mount it, Bonn slipped off the statue and broke her back. She is claiming that the restaurant as it fault for the accident due to a lack of safety features, such as a “steps, a ladder, or a non-slip saddle.”

Bonn is now seeking damages of more than $15,000, but it’s not going to be an easy battle.

The restaurant’s most loyal customers have launched a social media campaign in support of the burro: The campaign, under the very appropriate banner of “Just Because I’m an a**, it doesn’t mean I have to be treated like one,” is quickly gaining supporters, including this blogger, of course.

Because, really, how can you not be with El burro on this one?

Via: Periódico ABC

Hat tip: @SaltaSolt