Amy Klobuchar Says her Spanish Name Used to be Elena; Hilarity Ensues

During a meeting with a mostly Hispanic crowd, Amy Klobuchar reminded us her Spanish name used to be Elena –for some reason.

During a meeting Tuesday night with Culinary Union members in Las Vegas, Sen. Amy Klobuchar tried to relate to a mostly Hispanic crowd by talking about her fourth-grade Spanish and other Spanish-related anecdotes. According to various reports, Klobuchar kicked off her presentation by saying: “My name is Amy, but when I was in fourth grade Spanish they gave me the name Elena.”

I decided to tweet out a video of the exchage using the hashtag #MyKlobucharEthnicName and what followed was a hilarious thread of people sharing their “ethnic name.” Purely for this blogger’s entertainment (I hope).

WATCH the original video (below) and then scroll down for some hilarious responses:

Hispanics at Starbucks

Shut up, Alicia!

Chomp, chomp!

Lalo is Klobuspeak for AMLO

EMLO, anyone?

JUST FOLLOW #MyKlobucharEthnicName for more entertainment…

Got Milk? Too Bad. This Texas Shop Wants to Know if you Got Papers Instead

As if things were not already difficult for Hispanics living in America these days, local businesses are now trolling us with a supposedly funny t-shirt that takes a jab at Hispanics by questioning their legal status.

The above t-shirt –that takes a page from the popular Got Milk slogan–was spotted a few days ago in Ebony Mart, a popular shopping stop for Hispanics in Port Arthur, Texas, by local residents who found it outrageous –and definitely not funny.

As of this writing, the store owner had apologized and reportedly stopped selling said t-shirts, which I’m willing to bet are Made in either Mexico or El Salvador, two of America’s main exporters of cotton apparel.  🤷🏽‍♀️

Via: Local 12 News 

 

 

Being Hispanic in America Used to Be Challenging; Now It’s Outright Dangerous 😱

I’m not going to lie: These days –after many, many years living on this side of the border– I’ve become increasingly uneasy about doing things that I normally would do in public: Speak Spanish, wear hoop earrings, say outloud I’m Mexican a mucha honra, etc. etc.

The reason? As I keep saying on Twitter, being a minority in America used to be difficult, yes, but now it’s just plain dangerous.

Barely days after an anti-Mexican nutcase shot dozens of people in a Walmart in El Paso, Texas, many of them fatally, another member of the “I Am a White Dude Who Hates Hispanics” clan was arrested after making a series of social media threats against Hispanics in the Miami area.

According to multiple press reports, Eric Lin, a Maryland native, sent a bunch of threatening messages on Facebook professing his nazi beliefs, and vowing to exterminate the entire “Latin Race” [sic] which he also referred to as “rabid dogs.”

Unsurprisingly, Mr. Lin then went on to praise the “great president” of this nation, who as we all know kicked off his presidential campaign by calling us criminals, drug-dealers and rapists.

Coincidence? Ummmmmm….

The Mexican Hat Chips & Salsa Bowl Is All I Need for Christmas

My birthday is not until May, but if you find it in your heart to give this blogger one of these for Christmas and/or Black Friday, I’ll be forever grateful.

See? It’s not only a convenient way to serve your chips & salsa without making a soggy mess, but it closes automatically *and* it plays MEXICAN HAT DANCE MUSIC! (whatever that means).

WATCH this thing in action here and please, please, please, send one over!

Hat tip: @lechancle

This Super PAC Claims Hot Latinas are ‘Huge’ Fans of Trump. Fact Check: No, We’re not

A Trump Super PAC is using the hashtag #HispanicsBreakTheInternet to help spread the word that Trump is HUGE among my people (i.e. The Hot Latinas.)

As a spicy member of such a collective, I can tell you that’s simply not true. But I do hope the Latinas that do support the president have had some time to brush up on their Spanish grammar skills. Last time I checked, they were proudly pitching themselves as Latinas para Trump, instead of the accurate Latinas por Trump.

Anyway: What’s with these people *and* their president’s lousy grammar?

¡Pum, pum! NRA Enlists Venezuelan Former Olympic Shooter, so Hispanics Can Love Guns, Too

The huge power of my people (i.e. “The Hispanics”) is not lost on the National Rifle Association (NRA,) which has enlisted a Venezuelan gun enthusiast as part of its national ad campaign: Freedom Safest Place.

In one commercial, former Olympic pistol-shooter Gabby Franco says: “The government took our guns…the biggest mistake Venezuelans made was believing that this would never happen.” And by “this” she means that as a result Venezuela is suffering record violence under criminals who now outgun unarmed citizens.

According to Fox News Latino, while the NRA will not publicly say it is trying to woo Hispanics, experts say “the NRA views the minority group as a potent force to try and grow its aging membership.”

So… ¡Ajúa!…. ¡Pum, pum! ¡Freedom!

WATCH. CRINGE. DO NOT REPEAT

Via: Fox News Latino

This Guy Wanted to Build a Wall in his Restaurant Because Hispanics Don’t Tip 😂

“Give MI a break,” says Wayte.

Poor Steve Wayte.

The owner of a weirdly named sushi restaurant in California is under fire after making a joke that some of my people (i.e. Fast & Furious Hispanics) DID. NOT. FIND. FUNNY.

The joke? Upon realizing that Hispanics tend to not leave tips in his restaurant, Wayte wrote the following on his Facebook page:

As expected, the Fury of Twitter descended on the poor guy, who had to apologize like 100 times, first on social media and then on national television, saying he did not mean any harm.

But none of this mattered, of course, because last time I checked, a local politician named Henry Perea was still pretty pissed and calling for a boycott of — are you ready? — Roll One For Mi.

Come on, people. Give Steve a break! Today for MI, tomorrow for USTEDES.

Via: Fresno Bee

You, Guys! ‘Ethnic Halloween’ Season is Here!

Not sure how this qualifies as a 'costume,' but whatev...
Not sure how this qualifies as a ‘costume,’ but whatev…

Somehow the people over at Spirit Halloween think that wearing the Mexican flag or wrapping it around your body is a good Halloween costume idea.

They are wrong.

In fact, you should know that famous Mexican people do that on a regular basis, even if it annoys the hell out of our president and — more importantly — our Director of Democratic Culture and Civic Promotion.

So now you know. Why wait for Halloween when you can be like our celebs and just wrap yourself in the Mexican flag just because?

Blogger’s Note: For other wonderful examples of “ethnic-relevant costumes,” click here, here or here.

Hispanic Heritage Month is Finally Over; Now Back to your Regular Programming

I don’t know you, but I was frankly getting tired of all this “Hispanics are great,” “Hispanics are awesome,” “We are all Mexicans” rhetoric.

Luckily, the month-long marketing fiesta known as Hispanic Heritage Month is finally over, so media can get their butt back to reporting regular Hispanic stories, in which my people are no longer a colorful, boisterous bunch, but simply “probable cause” for traffic stops, frisks, deportation, etc. To wit.

ProbableCause

So enjoy your next eleven months of non-Hispanic-Heritage. See you in 2016!

via: Daily News

Yeah, Hispanic Scholarships Sound like a Swell Idea, but Right Now We Need a ‘Delibrero’

delibrero

Attention, New York Hispanics!

The Hispanic Scholarship Fund is offering help to “prepare, plan and pay for your children’s university,” which is, like, great, but let’s be honest: Chances are you’re going to end up in debt anyhow, and your children, cleaning toilets for Donald Trump.

But don’t despair. You might want to call the number above and get yourself a steady job as a “delibrero,” which I can assure you is an activity in high demand — at least in Hispanic Harlem.

Now, if being a “delibrero” is not your thing, you might want to consider this awesome sandwich opportunity, also in Harlem and — naturally — well paid. (NOTE: little to no English required. Yay!)

But hurry! the American Dream might not wait for you forever.

Photo: Laura Martínez, Harlem, August 2015

This Ad Campaign Features ‘El Trumpo’ under the Threat of Dangerous Latinos

JLOTrump

Miami-based Zubi advertising — which works for clients including Ford, Chase and American Airlines — has been making sure to operate under one simple motto: Erase Stereotypes.

So, in hopes of making the most out of the — still strong — Trump vs. Latinos brouhaha, Zubi has created a hilarious social campaign featuring — who else? — the King of Stereotyping My People (aka El Trumpo.)

VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: Despite my being Mexican and all, I did NOT steal these images. They were graciously offered to me by Zubi’s ECD Iván Calle. So, gracias for avoiding me a trip to the Copyright Infringement Offices. 

He’s not only dangerous; he’s also MEXICAN!

Oscar

Watch out for Colombians. They’re way more dangerous than Columbians

colombian

…And don’t get him started on Mario

Mario

‘Hispanic Democrats for Trump’ Launches Ad Campaign

HispanicDemocrats

Luckily for this blogger, the world has become a much more entertaining place since famous, rich person Donald Trump (aka El Trompo) decided to declare war on my people (i.e. The Mexicans).

Thanks to Mr. Trump, this blog has seen the Trump Piñata, the Trump Corrido and — of course — the Latino car dealership awesome commercial.

So, I couldn’t be happy to introduce you to Hispanic Democrats for Donald Trump, a group that really — really — wants El Trompo to become the GOP candidate in 2016.

I mean… who wouldn’t?

Via: Advertising Age

H is for ‘Hispanics:’ Hillary Really Wants your [Hispanic] Vote

CCei08ZWAAASEm-

Hillary Clinton, aka the wife of the non-inhaler former President of the United States, on Sunday formally announced her second run for the White House. But she did it in the most millennial fashion: through a digital blitz in English — and Spanish — portraying herself as a champion of everyday Americans.

“La Clinton” even posted her now archfamous tweet in a so-so Spanish, in which she claims she wants to be el defensor [SIC] and not “la defensora” of the American people.

I’m not sure if I need Hillary as my defensor or defensora for anything, but I’m pretty damn sure she’s way a better alternative than this guy and certainly this other one.

Awww, if only I could vote…

Via: CNET en Español

Hispanic Jeb Bush Is the Best Thing on Twitter Right Now

Unless you live under a rock, in a detention center in Guantánamo or in a place without access to Twitter (very unlikely), you would have heard by now that Former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush once identified himself as Hispanic in a voter registration application.

50804272According to a Miami-Dade County document published Monday by The New York Times, Bush listed his race/ethnicity as “Hispanic,” in a 2009 voter-registration application, a fact that quickly spread over social media, giving way to some hilarious tweets, starting with Hispanic Jeb Bush himself.

The incident quickly gave way to the creation of the YebBush Twitter account, which promptly began interacting with this blogger.

I say we should cut this guy some slack. He speaks fluent Spanish. His wife, Columba (NOT Columbia) Bush, was born in Mexico and for two years in his 20s, he lived in Venezuela… Besides, his Spanish is WAY better than that of many “Hispanics” I know. I promise.