Challenged by some very unorthodox methods to teach English to Latinos (such as this one and this other one) Mexicans have come up with yet the most creative way to teach Spanish to English speaking people (i.e. mostly gringos.)
All you have to do is read the following sentences as if you were reading English.
Check it out. It’s easy, it’s revolutionary and… It’s FREE!
1. Boy As-N-R (Voy a cenar): I’m going to have dinner
2. N-L-C John (En el sillón): On the armchair
3. Be a Hope and Son (Viejo panzón): Fat old man
4. As Say Toon As (Aceitunas): Olives
5. The Head The Star Mall Less Stan Doe (Deje de estar molestando): Stop bugging me
6. Kit At Tell Loss War at Chess (Quítate los huaraches): Take off your sandals
7. Pass a Lass All Saw (Pasa la salsa): Pass the sauce
8. Be Goat Tess The Ran Chair-O (Bigotes de ranchero): Farmer’s mustache
9. Web Us Come Ham On (Huevos con jamón)
10. Does Stack Kit Toes The Car Neat As (Dos taquitos de carnitas): Two pork little tacos
Remember that nonsensical trend of putting “eñes” where they don’t belong just to make something look –and sound– more authentically “Latino?”
Well, it looks like salsa makers and Hispanic journalists organizations are not alone in this thing. The latest to jump on the nonsensical “eñe wagon” (or should I say “wagoñ?”) is The Hispanic Star, a non-for-profit organization that seeks to “raise awareness of the contributions of the Hispanic community to the United States.”
According to its latest mailer, the Hispanic Star wants us to SAVE THE DATE and celebrate the 2020 Hipanic Heritage… Mñnth [SIC] which I believe it’s nonsense English for the word “month”.
I get it. As we approach the dreaded Hispanic Heritage Month, corporations, politicians and NGOs want to sound all cute and Latin in order to properly pander to my people, but how about learning first to put the “eñe” where it DOES belong? Like in “jalapeño?” for example?
Per the above sign, a Mexican small business owner is seeking an “experienced” female employee for a nondescript position. Applicants must be adults and not addicted to social media, including Whatsap [SIC] and [Facebok.]
Filing under: Mexicans, How can anyone not like us?
The owners of the Café Cordial in Paris’ Opera District are very nice people. Not only do they make sure to mumble some English words for the crowds of American visitors who show up there everyday without speaking a word of French; but they even go out of their way to translate their menu not in one but in two languages.
While some of the English translations in their menu is OK (I just said “OK,”) it is clear that they got lost in the [Google] Spanish translation.
Here are some hilarious examples.
BLOGGER’S NOTE: Apologies to the monolingual crowd; this is funny only if you understand both English and Spanish.
1. Croissant = The thing that grows
There’s the translation for croissant as “1 que crece” (literally: one thing that grows) and toast as “brindis,” as in the toast to happiness….
2. Smoked Salmon = The salmon who had too much to smoke
3. The Horny Goat that is served over a salutation
There are several more yet to be highlighted… Be my guest and find them yourselves, will you? I’m too busy dealing with the country’s Happy Hours.
Not content with inventing the Coc Nuts Coold the Apelbii’s and the Crossfit Taquería among many other binational wonders, Mexico is now introducing a new concept in sugary treats: The cupcaky, which I can only guess is a close relative to its gringo counterpart, the cupcake…
Oh, and I’m sure this thing is damn good, since it costs five times more than a conchita and three times more than a dona.
And I say “inexplicably,” because as any bilingual person will tell you, cerdo or puerco would be the correct Spanish translation of the word “pork.” See? Pork is NOT Spanish for Pork, thus the weirdness of the whole Pork-te-inspira-business.
I have no idea why they decided to go that route, but I’ve already sent them a VIT (a Very Important Tweet) asking for a comment or -in the worst case scenario- a clarification.
I suppose El puerco te inspira or El cerdo te inspira would be slogans better suited for the National Porn Board, but we’ll never know for sure until they get back to me (which very likely will be never.)
After almost eight years of blogging about the wonderful world of Spanish-language media, marketing and pop culture, I’ve come across all kinds of weird, poor, lazy, bad and terrible translations from English to Spanish and viceversa.
Some are plain silly, others are just hilarious. But this one above (whose origin is still shady) takes the cake -or should I say ‘se lleva el pastel?’
NOTE: In all honesty, I think the above might just be a case of very witty Photoshop. But… oh, how I wish it were true!